第一篇:5人英语话剧剧本
5人英语话剧剧本-Yes Means No(似是而非)Teddy Lawson is going to marry Edith Merrill and he asks his father, Mr.Lawson, to finance his honeymoon.However, Teddy's father wants him to learn to say NO first because Teddy always says YES to everyone who makes a request.They make a deal that Mr.Lawson will give Teddy one hundred dollars for every time Teddy says NO in half an hour, but if Teddy says YES just once, Teddy forfeits every NO-Mr.Lawson's secretary, Miss Collins, will make the strict account of every NO.In order to have a nice honeymoon, Teddy tries hard to carry out his father's orders and answer NO as many as possible to everything asked, even though he is running the risks of breaking his father's deal with T.J.Morgan and losing his own sweet heart,Edith Merrill...TEDDY:(Coming to his father's desk L.)Dad, there's something I want to tell you.LAWSON: Oh, is that so!What is it?
TEDDY: Well, Dad, I've just proposed to Edith Merrill and she's accepted me.LAWSON: Going to get married, eh? When do you intend doing this?
TEDDY: Right away.That's why I wanted to see you, and of course I know you'll finance the honeymoon.LAWSON: Oh...I will, will I?(Pounds desk, rises and comes to Teddy C.)I'll tell you that I'm ashamed of you.You haven't any backbone...you can't say NO!I left you in charge of my business last week just to see how you'd conduct it.And you did great.Ha!...If I'd stayed away another week, you'd have ruined me(Strolls up C.)TEDDY: I did the best I could!
LAWSON: Then you'd make a fine business man.(Coming down C.)The most essential thing in a business man's life is to be able to say “NO.” At all times NO.Especially in a credit business like mine.But you said YES to everyone who asked for extra time.(Takes a few steps L.)TEDDY: But they always cried to me and I just couldn't say “no.”
LAWSON: Well, you'll learn to say “no” before I finance any honeymoon.(Lawson is below desk L.Phone rings, Lawson turns to his desk, grabs phone quickly and sits down.)Lawson talking...!(Listens a second.)NO!!I...said...NO.(Listens again.)Then I'll foreclose.That's final..NO!(Lawson hangs up receiver.Turns to Teddy.)That's how I make my money..being able to say NO..NO..NO.(Pounds desk with each “No!” Rises and comes to Teddy C.)And that's the way I want my son to be before he shoulders the responsibility of marriage.TEDDY: Well, give me another chance, Dad...and I'll try to make good.LAWSON:(He sneers the last word and takes a stroH up C.)Do you mean it?
TEDDY: You betl do
LAWSON:(Coming down L of Teddy.)
TEDDY: All right...I'll give you another chance.You want money for a honeymoon?...Very well!You take charge of this office while I go to lunch and I'll give you one hundred dollars for every time you say NO.LAWSON: One hundred dollars?
TEDDY: Right!Do you think you can do it? LAWSON: I'll try.TEDDY:(Crosses R to Miss Collins.)Miss Collins, I want you to remain in this office with my son while I'm gone.You can sit at my desk.(Miss Collins doesn't move immediately.)NOW!(She jumps and crosses stage.)COLLINS: Yes, sir!
LAWSON:(Crosses L.)And I don't want you to leave it for a second.Understand?(Miss Collins nods.)And I want you to keep strict account of every time my son says NO.But remember, if he answers YES just once...he forfeits every “NO.”(Turning to Teddy.)Are you on? TEDDY: Yes.(He realizes what he has said and clasps hand over his mouth.)
LAWSON:(Crossing R to door, taking coat and hat from hall-tree.)Very well.You'll be in charge here for one-half hour...(Looks at watch.)Now remember...not one “Yes.”...It must be “NO” to everything.(Lawson exits and slams door.)(Teddy stands for a second smiling.Phone rings, and he rushes across stage to phone on desk L, and picking it up shouts into it.TEDDY: NO..POSITIVELY NO!(Hangs up.Strolls across stage, grinning at Miss Collins, who is amazed.)That's two...put them down.COLLINS:(Writing.)Yes, sir.(Phone rings.Teddy grabs it again, while Miss Collins warns him to be careful.)You better hear who it is, sir.It may be important.TEDDY: Hello?(Repeating what is said to him.)Is Mr.Lawson in? NO!Do I mind speaking for him? NO!What?...NO!
COLLINS:(Rising and pleading.)Don't you think you'd better hang up, sir?
TEDDY:(To Miss Collins.)No.Put them all down...there were five of them.(Into phone.)No, no, no!(Raising three fingers to Miss Collins.)I wasn't talking to you...I was talking to Mr.Lawson's secretary.What? No!I should worry? No!(Hangs up.Laughing heartily at his results so far.)COLLINS:(Fearfully.)Aren't you going a little too far, sir?
TEDDY: No!There's another.Are you keeping strict account of them?(Crosses to desk L.)How many are there?
COLLINS: Just...just thirteen, sir.TEDDY:(Taking C and dancing a step.)Thirteen, eh? COLLINS: But isn't that an unlucky number, sir?
TEDDY: No!That makes fourteen!(Teddy crosses to desk R.)Well, that's a trip to California, anyway.(Phone rings.But this time Miss Collins gets it first.)
COLLINS: Hullo? Just a second, please.(Now to Teddy in a whisper.)It's T.J.Morgan to see your father.TEDDY: No!
COLLINS: Shall I tell him to come back?
TEDDY: No!
COLLINS: But he wants to know if he can see Mr.Lawson? TEDDY: Tell him NO!(Emphatically.Crosses R.)
COLLINS:(Into phone.)No!(Hangs up.)
TEDDY:(Enjoying it all immensely.)Add three more to the list.How many is that now?(Teddy crosses to desk L.)(At this point T.J.Morgan rushes into room unceremoniously.)
MORGAN: What's the idea of telling me I can't see Lawson? Is he in?(Comes C as Teddy circles below him to R.)
TEDDY: No!(Miss Collins keeps marking every “no.”)MORGAN:(Turning to Miss Collins L.)Then who said Lawson wouldn't see me? Was it you?(Mill Collins starts to answer but Teddy butts in.)
TEDDY: No!(Hoists a finger for Miss Collins to get the additional “no” on the record.)
MORGAN:(Turning back to Teddy R.)Oh, then it was you? TEDDY:(Gulping.)No!
MORGAN:(Confused.)Then who was it? Was there anybody else in the office? TEDDY: No!
MORGAN: Can't you say anything but “NO-O-O!?” TEDDY:(Imitating his dragged out “No.”)“NO-O-O!”
MORGAN:(Waving his hand in disgust.)You're a silly ass...Will you deny that? TEDDY: For a hundred dollars?..NO!(Signals Miss Collins to add it on the list.)
MORGAN: You're impossible.You tell him that T.J.Morgan was here to see him about that lumber deal.He likes to make money the same as everybody, doesn't he? TEDDY: Why...er..NO!
MORGAN: What?(He shakes his finger in Teddy's face.)Do you mean to tell me he's not interested in that lumber deal any more?(Miss Collins tries to speak.Morgan turns to her quickly.)Were you going to say something? TEDDY: No..Shefifteen-TEDDY: Don't skip any.COLLINS: Just forty-six, sir.TEDDY:(Excitedly, taking stage.)Forty-six? Why, it'll be a trip around the world.I must make it an even fifty.(Offstage R, Lawson's voice is heard in warm argument.)
LAWSON: You just come in here with me.We'll see what this is all about.(He enters swiftly, followed by Edith and Mr.Morgan.They surround Teddy who has sneaked to C, half frightened.)Now Miss Merrill, ask him before me.EDITH:(Half crying.)Didn't you tell me your father paid you to break off our engagement? TEDDY: NO!(She staggers back amazed.)
MORGAN: When I asked you about the lumber deal, what did you say? TEDDY: NO!
LAWSON:(Coming toward Teddy and shaking his fist.)Don't you know any better than that? TEDDY: NO!(Calling to Miss Collins on opposite side.)That makes fifty!!LAWSON:(Bewildered)What's the idea?
TEDDY: The idea is that I've carried out your orders...I haven't said one...(Catches himself.)what you said not to say.LAWSON:(Shaking fist in Teddy's face.)Do you think I'm a complete idiot? TEDDY: No!(To Miss Collins.)There's another one...put it down.LAWSON:(To Miss Collins.)Don't you DARE put that down.I've had enough of this.MORGAN:(Approaching Lawson L, and brushing Teddy aside.)I think I understand it all now.It was ajoke.LAWSON: Absolutely!(Going to door R with Morgan.)We'll talk it over at the club tonight.(Morgan exits R.)
TEDDY:(Meeting his father C, and grasping his coat lapel.)Make a check for me...for five thousand dollars.Fifty “No's,” you know.LAWSON:(Crossing to desk L.)How could anyone say fifty “No's” in fifteen minutes? Imagine what I could do in an hour.My middle name is Speed.LAWSON: All right, I'm the goat.I'll give you the check.Then use some of that speed in getting out of here.(He turns to desk L, and sees Miss Collins seated at it.)Well, what are you doing at my desk?
COLLINS:(Rising, frightened.)Why, you told me to sit here, sir.Shall I go to my own desk, sir? LAWSON:(Shouting.)YES!(Miss Collins crosses R, to her own desk.)TEDDY:(Crossing to his father's desk.)Did I hear you say YES? LAWSON: NO!(Writes in checkbook.)
EDITH:(Coming to Teddy C.)Oh, Teddy, I see it all now.“No” meant “Yes”..when you said “no.”
TEDDY: “No”..“Yes”...wait...When I said “No”...when I said...I...(Conflised.)Oh, I only know we are going on a honeymoon.(They kiss and embrace.)
LAWSON:(Rises with check in hand and comes C.)Here's your check.I made it out for ten thousand instead of five, because ten will take you farther away and keep you away longer.TEDDY:(Taking check and looking at it.)Why, Dad!You're wonderful..you're marvelous..you're...(Changing tone.)IS IT GOOD?(Father swells with satisfaction on praise, but turns furiously on last line.)Well, come on, darling.Good-bye, Dad...(They both start for door R.)(Teddy catches hand of Edith who waits for him in door R, and they plunge off happily together.)(Lawson and Miss Collins stare after them, Miss Collins chuckling with delight.)The End
第二篇:英语话剧剧本
英语话剧剧本:4人英语话剧 Another day in paradise 场景简单,语言适中,4个主要人物,推荐。适合课上演出,很有意义,关于亲情
Characters: Angel: A chief broadcaster.Anny: A primary school girl who had called so much in order to look for her mother.Anny’s father Anny’s teacher Anny’s classmates Divide the stage into two parts.On the left: Children’s ward, a chair, some flowers.On the right: A desk, a chair, a lamp, some books.(幕启,舞台左半亮,右半暗)(The phone is ringing)Old woman: Hello!Anny(怯生生地): Hello, I, I want mum.Is that mum? Old woman: Oh, I’m granny.I’m not mum.Anny: I’m sorry.(电话挂断声,拨号声又起)A young woman: Hello!Anny(怯生生地): Hello!I want mum.Is that mum? Young woman: Are you joking? I’m not married.(电话继续响,右半舞台亮)Angel: Hello!Anny(鼓起勇气): I want mum.Is that mum? Angel: Who’s that speaking? Anny: I’m Anny, your Anny.Angel: Anny?(充满疑惑)。(略为思索后,用母亲的声调)Where are you? Anny(仿佛遇见母亲,忍不住哭起来): Mum,(哭声,欲语泪先流,又猛然惊觉)Mum, mum, I’m not crying.Angel(安慰地,担心地): You are a nice little girl.Anny: Mum, why don’t you come to see me? Dad says you will come back if I am well behaved.Mum, don’t you miss me? Angel(慈爱地): Of course, I do.I do miss you? Anny: Really? Angel: Yes.I miss you so much.Anny: Mummy!Angel: En„ Anny: Mummy!Angel: Yes? Anny(笑若银铃)(Angel 慈爱地笑,心略有所安)Anny(突然又哭了): But mummy, why don’t you come back? I’m ill.Angel(关切地): Anny, where are you? Tell me, where are you? Anny: Mummy, I’m in hospital now.I felt pain, but I didn’t cry.Dad says the one who cries is not a good girl.Then you won’t come back.Mummy, can you come back to see me? I’m waiting for you with no tears.Angel: Anny, I’m, I’m not„ Oh, yes, mummy will come back to see you(Dad推门入,见Anny在打电话,连忙夺过)Dad: I’ve told you not to call anybody else.(对着电话)Sorry, I’m really sorry.The child has disturbed you.Angel: Never mind.I’m a mother, too.I understand her.May I know the truth? Dad: Eh„, her mum isn’t here.So she called and called.Angel: Where’s Anny’s mother? You divorced? Dad: No, no.I hope she would come back.But„
Angel: You don’t trust in me? I’m Angel, the chief broadcaster of the hot line.Dad(回头看Anny): Then, I’ll tell you the truth some other day.Angel:All right.(灯暗景换)On the left: Anny’s sitting room.On the right: Anny’s classroom.(左右同时演绎)Left: Dad: Anny’s mum passed away in a tracffic accident six years ago.She told me to hide the truth.This is the letter for Anny.Right: Teacher: Children, in this class.Let’s enjoy Anny’s composition “A letter to mummy”.Angel, Anny同时,时空错接,音乐起)Angel: Anny, my dearest baby!Anny: Mummy, my dearest mummy!Angel: When we played hide and seek, I was found easily.Anny: When we played hide and seek, I could found you easily.Angel: But this time, you can’t find me.Anny: But this time, I can’t find you.Angel: Baby, we have a date.When you are 14, you can find me.Anny: Mummy, we have a date.Dad says when I am 14, I can find you.Angel: Baby, the game lasts so long.I wonder if you have the courage to go on.Anny: Mummy, don’t worry.I grow up with your arms around me in my dream.Angel: Anny, if the time is so long, mummy will talk with you when you are looking at our photo.Anny: Mum, the letter you left to me is so long.I read it every night, again and again.Angel: Anny, your birthday present is on the wardrobe.Anny: Mummy, I’ve known the truth.Every time I take a bus, I can see your dad eyes.Angel: Anny, I’m really worried if you will be so sad after your 14th birthday.Is there anyone to love you all his life? Anny: Mummy, I’ll never give up.I believe there is a call to the paradise.I will love Dad.I will love myself.I can fly with my own wings one day.Angel: Anny, my dear.Anny: Mummy, be safe all the way.There are no tears in paradise.(灯亮,谢幕)
第三篇:英语话剧剧本
英语话剧剧本
在一个鸟语花香的一个早上,站长一如既往地坐在办公室,一边翘着二郎腿,一边单手拿起一本咖啡喝。在他的眼里,他觉得,今天又是一个休闲的日子,只要坐在办公室,有空出去外面巡查一下环境,就可以回家看电视去了。但他没有想到,今天在他的身边竟然会发生一些令他抓破头皮的事情。
他喝完咖啡,慢悠悠地走出值班室,挺着一个大肚子,威武地巡视着地铁站内的人群。每个人都匆匆地来匆匆地去,从来没有留意过身边的人和事。站长这个时候伸伸懒腰,正准备回值班室大睡一觉的时候,突然不知道哪里出来的一个人把他撞倒了。站长甩了一个跟头,挺笨拙地爬起来刚想大骂一顿的时候,却首先听到一把声音,有点怯懦地说:“对不起对不起” 站长这个时候擦擦眼睛,开始打量眼前的这个人:他的衣着很随意,脏兮兮的样子,而且还带着一副墨镜。站长就开始骂了:“你没长眼睛吗?这样也能撞上我!”然后那个人就回答说:“我是一个盲人,我都看不到要在哪里候车了。”站长听了之后,也见到他是一个残疾人,便说:“没事啦,我是这里的站长,如果你不知道哪里候车的话,可以咨询一下当班的值班员嘛。不过既然你遇上了我,我就帮你带路吧。”这时候盲人也说了一声:“好的,非常感谢你。”于是,站长让盲人一手牵着他,一手摸着扶手,慢慢地下楼梯到乘车站台。站长拖着盲人慢慢地走,突然脚底下一绊,整个人又甩了一跤,幸好盲人一手扶着墙壁没有摔倒。这时候站长发火了,起来就说一句:“特么的是谁!”这一次没有人回答他。于是站长低头一看,有一个乘客正躺在地上一动也不动了。站长于是就怕了,马上松开牵着盲人的手,盲人觉察到不对劲,就问:“发生什么事了”站长结结巴巴地回答:“地…地上…躺…躺着…一个人啊!!”盲人显然要比站长冷静:“快去看一下他是否还活着”于是站长弯下腰,问一句:“先生请问你还清醒吗?”没有回应。于是站长又弯下腰用耳朵贴着他的胸口听他的心跳声,可是出人意料地听不到。站长这时候怕了,他用手擦了一下额头的汗,然后又颤抖地把手伸向躺着的人鼻子,谁知道这时候传来呼呼的鼻鼾声。站长定了一下惊,然后又闻了一下他的衣服,一股很浓烈的酒精味,大概是喝醉酒了吧。于是站长让醉酒的人继续躺着,扶了盲人上车之后,然后就来看了一下醉酒的人,结果发现还没醒。站长本来想着呼叫值班员前来帮忙,但正是午饭时间,值班室空无一人,又不能置醉酒人一直在这里,于是自己便背起醉酒人爬上楼梯直到回到值班室。此时的站长已经气喘吁吁地,累个半死之下于是什么都不管了,躺在地上呼呼地睡着了…
第四篇:英语话剧剧本
Have you finished packing? 情景一
Mike :Hi, we are going to take advantage ofour two weeks vacation to have a relaxed trip.So where do you want to go for our trip?
Mina :Awesome!I am looking forward to going to London.!we are going to take advantage of the beautiful London’s scenery in the winter and have a” winter date week”Dave : Oh, that sounds nice!London is always extremelypretty this time of year.I just love it!
Mike: Nice , but this long distance trip is starting to wear me down.I amthinking that we’d do a little hiking.No matter where we gobut there is a really nice trail about five hour away from our house.It’s through the woods and so I’m sure it will look beautiful.Mina: Oh ,brother, You know that London is the place where I really want to go.I had read online that it was a decent place ,and I can’t forget how beautiful that is!
Dave : I agree with Mina.We have two weeks vacation not two days, sowe should have a long trip.Mike: Ok, ok, I guess I’ll agree to that , but only on one condition.市销话剧第二组
Mina and Dave: what’s that?
Mike: I want take some beautiful photos in this vacation ,so you must promisethat there are many beautiful sceneriesin the place where we go for trip.Mina: London is home to some of the most iconic attractions in the word from historic landmarks such as the Tower of London to more recent constructions likes the London Eye.So there is no need to worry about that.Dave: I believe that you will be snapping away like crazy.So we will go to London.情景二
Mike : what should we prepare for our trip? We should make a plan before we start packing.Mina :Sounds like a good idea.We should get the tourist visa and book plane tickets.Dave :Oh ,dear, How about my plants and dog?
Mike : Don’t worry ,how about give our house key to Haining Zhang, and she will take care of our house when we out.Mina : That sounds great.What’s more don’t forget to unplug TV and electrical stuff.Mike :So I will call Haining zhang.But where is my cell phone?市销话剧第二组
Oh, my cell phone!I lost my cell phone!
Dave :The kitchen.It’s in the kitchen.I saw it this morning.Mike :I get it.Ta-dah
Mina and Dave are packing.Haining: Hi, Mike ,this is Haining Zhang, how are you ? Mike : I am fine ,and you ?
Haining: I am fine , anythingalse?
Mike : Dear, we well have a two weeks trip, could you take care of our house in that time.Haining : Ok, no problem.What can I do for you?
Mike : Could you water my plants and feed my dog? I don’t want to put the dog in the kennel.Haining : Sure, it’s my pleasure.Have you finished packing? Mike : yeah , I have finished everything.Dave and Mina are packing now.these two they’re never prepared.Mina : Oh my god, where is my wallet!I can’t find it anywhere.Mike Bathroom.Mina : Are you sure? So strange.(hold up he wallet)I get it.Dave : Where is the tourist visa and tickets, and do you know where I put it ?
市销话剧第二组
Mike : Here, on the table.Dave get it.Mina :Mike!we’ll be late!Let’s go!
Haining :Have a great trip!
Mina ,Mike ,Dave, Bye , Haining.Mike : Does everyone have everything?
Mina , Dave: Yep!
Mike , Let’s go!
情景三
Dave :I don’t remember where I put the tourist visa and plane tickets.Mike: Oh ,no!there are only one hour left.Dave : Let me think, oh ,there it is ,I put it on the dresser.Mike ,Mina : what a relief!now ,London here come!
市销话剧第二组
第五篇:英语话剧剧本
英语话剧剧本:5人英语话剧剧本-Yes Means No(似是而非)本文来自: 教客网剧本大全(http://)详细出处参考:http:// Summary:
Teddy Lawson is going to marry Edith Merrill and he asks his father, Mr.Lawson, to finance his honeymoon.However, Teddy's father wants him to learn to say NO first because Teddy always says YES to everyone who makes a request.They make a deal that Mr.Lawson will give Teddy one hundred dollars for every time Teddy says NO in half an hour, but if Teddy says YES just once, Teddy forfeits every NO-Mr.Lawson's secretary, Miss Collins, will make the strict account of every NO.In order to have a nice honeymoon, Teddy tries hard to carry out his father's orders and answer NO as many as possible to everything asked, even though he is running the risks of breaking his father's deal with T.J.Morgan and losing his own sweet heart--Edith Merrill...TEDDY:(Coming to his father's desk L.)
Dad, there's something I want to tell you.LAWSON: Oh, is that so!What is it?
TEDDY: Well, Dad, I've just proposed to Edith Merrill and she's accepted me.LAWSON: Going to get married, eh? When do you intend doing this?
TEDDY: Right away.That's why I wanted to see you, and of course I know you'll finance the honeymoon.LAWSON: Oh...I will, will I?(Pounds desk, rises and comes to Teddy C.)I'll tell you that I'm ashamed of you.You haven't any backbone...you can't say NO!I left you in charge of my business last week just to see how you'd conduct it.And you did great.Ha!...If I'd stayed away another week, you'd have ruined me(Strolls up C.)TEDDY: I did the best I could!
LAWSON: Then you'd make a fine business man.(Coming down C.)The most essential thing in a business man's life is to be able to say “NO.” At all times NO.Especially in a credit business like mine.But you said YES to everyone who asked for extra time.(Takes a few steps L.)
TEDDY: But they always cried to me and I just couldn't say “no.”
LAWSON: Well, you'll learn to say “no” before I finance any honeymoon.(Lawson is below desk L.Phone rings, Lawson turns to his desk, grabs phone quickly and sits down.)Lawson talking...!(Listens a second.)NO!!I...said...NO.(Listens again.)Then I'll foreclose.That's final..NO!(Lawson hangs up receiver.Turns to Teddy.)That's how I make my money..being able to say NO..NO..NO.(Pounds desk with each “No!” Rises and comes to Teddy C.)And that's the way I want my son to be before he shoulders the responsibility of marriage.TEDDY: Well, give me another chance, Dad...and I'll try to make good.LAWSON:(He sneers the last Word and takes a stroll up C.)Do you mean it?
TEDDY: You bet I do
LAWSON:(Coming down L of Teddy.)
TEDDY: All right...I'll give you another chance.You want money for a honeymoon?...Very well!You take charge of this office while I go to lunch and I'll give you one hundred dollars for every time you say NO.LAWSON: One hundred dollars?
TEDDY: Right!Do you think you can do it? LAWSON: I'll try.TEDDY:(Crosses R to Miss Collins.)Miss Collins, I want you to remain in this office with my son while I'm gone.You can sit at my desk.(Miss Collins doesn't move immediately.)NOW!(She jumps and crosses stage.)
COLLINS: Yes, sir!
LAWSON:(Crosses L.)And I don't want you to leave it for a second.Understand?(Miss Collins nods.)And I want you to keep strict account of every time my son says NO.But remember, if he answers YES just once...he forfeits every “NO.”(Turning to Teddy.)Are you on? TEDDY: Yes.(He realizes what he has said and clasps hand over his mouth.)
LAWSON:(Crossing R to door, taking coat and hat from hall-tree.)Very well.You'll be in charge here for one-half hour...(Looks at watch.)Now remember...not one “Yes.”...It must be “NO” to everything.(Lawson exits and slams door.)(Teddy stands for a second smiling.Phone rings, and he rushes across stage to phone on desk L, and picking it up shouts into it.TEDDY: NO..POSITIVELY NO!(Hangs up.Strolls across stage, grinning at Miss Collins, who is amazed.)That's two...put them down.COLLINS:(Writing.)Yes, sir.(Phone rings.Teddy grabs it again, while Miss Collins warns him to be careful.)You better hear who it is, sir.It may be important.TEDDY: Hello?(Repeating what is said to him.)Is Mr.Lawson in? NO!Do I mind speaking for him? NO!What?...NO!
COLLINS:(Rising and pleading.)Don't you think you'd better hang up, sir?
TEDDY:(To Miss Collins.)No.Put them all down...there were five of them.(Into phone.)No, no, no!(Raising three fingers to Miss Collins.)I wasn't talking to you...I was talking to Mr.Lawson's secretary.What? No!I should worry? No!(Hangs up.Laughing heartily at his results so far.)COLLINS:(Fearfully.)Aren't you going a little too far, sir?
TEDDY: No!There's another.Are you keeping strict account of them?(Crosses to desk L.)How many are there?
COLLINS: Just...just thirteen, sir.TEDDY:(Taking C and dancing a step.)Thirteen, eh? COLLINS: But isn't that an unlucky number, sir?
TEDDY: No!That makes fourteen!(Teddy crosses to desk R.)Well, that's a trip to California, anyway.(Phone rings.But this time Miss Collins gets it first.)
COLLINS: Hullo? Just a second, please.(Now to Teddy in a whisper.)It's T.J.Morgan to see your father.TEDDY: No!
COLLINS: Shall I tell him to come back?
TEDDY: No!
COLLINS: But he wants to know if he can see Mr.Lawson? TEDDY: Tell him NO!(Emphatically.Crosses R.)
COLLINS:(Into phone.)No!(Hangs up.)
TEDDY:(Enjoying it all immensely.)Add three more to the list.How many is that now?(Teddy crosses to desk L.)(At this point T.J.Morgan rushes into room unceremoniously.)MORGAN: What's the idea of telling me I can't see Lawson? Is he in?(Comes C as Teddy circles below him to R.)
TEDDY: No!(Miss Collins keeps marking every “no.”)
MORGAN:(Turning to Miss Collins L.)Then who said Lawson wouldn't see me? Was it you?(Mill Collins starts to answer but Teddy butts in.)
TEDDY: No!(Hoists a finger for Miss Collins to get the additional “no” on the record.)
MORGAN:(Turning back to Teddy R.)Oh, then it was you?
TEDDY:(Gulping.)No!
MORGAN:(Confused.)Then who was it? Was there anybody else in the office? TEDDY: No!
MORGAN: Can't you say anything but “NO-O-O!?” TEDDY:(Imitating his dragged out “No.”)“NO-O-O!”
MORGAN:(Waving his hand in disgust.)You're a silly ass...Will you deny that? TEDDY: For a hundred dollars?..NO!(Signals Miss Collins to add it on the list.)
MORGAN: You're impossible.You tell him that T.J.Morgan was here to see him about that lumber deal.He likes to make money the same as everybody, doesn't he?
TEDDY: Why...er..NO!
MORGAN: What?(He shakes his finger in Teddy's face.)Do you mean to tell me he's not interested in that lumber deal any more?(Miss Collins tries to speak.Morgan turns to her quickly.)Were you going to say something? TEDDY: No..Shefifteen-
TEDDY: Don't skip any.COLLINS: Just forty-six, sir.TEDDY:(Excitedly, taking stage.)Forty-six? Why, it'll be a trip around the world.I must make it an even fifty.(Offstage R, Lawson's voice is heard in warm argument.)
LAWSON: You just come in here with me.We'll see what this is all about.(He enters swiftly, followed by Edith and Mr.Morgan.They surround Teddy who has sneaked to C, half frightened.)Now Miss Merrill, ask him before me.EDITH:(Half crying.)Didn't you tell me your father paid you to break off our engagement? TEDDY: NO!(She staggers back amazed.)
MORGAN: When I asked you about the lumber deal, what did you say? TEDDY: NO!
LAWSON:(Coming toward Teddy and shaking his fist.)Don't you know any better than that? TEDDY: NO!(Calling to Miss Collins on opposite side.)That makes fifty!!
LAWSON:(Bewildered)What's the idea?
TEDDY: The idea is that I've carried out your orders...I haven't said one...(Catches himself.)what you said not to say.LAWSON:(Shaking fist in Teddy's face.)Do you think I'm a complete idiot? TEDDY: No!(To Miss Collins.)There's another one...put it down.LAWSON:(To Miss Collins.)Don't you DARE put that down.I've had enough of this.MORGAN:(Approaching Lawson L, and brushing Teddy aside.)I think I understand it all now.It was a joke.LAWSON: Absolutely!(Going to door R with Morgan.)We'll talk it over at the club tonight.(Morgan exits R.)TEDDY:(Meeting his father C, and grasping his coat lapel.)Make a check for me...for five thousand dollars.Fifty “No's,” you know.LAWSON:(Crossing to desk L.)How could anyone say fifty “No's” in fifteen minutes?
Imagine what I could do in an hour.My middle name is Speed.LAWSON: All right, I'm the goat.I'll give you the check.Then use some of that speed in getting out of here.(He turns to desk L, and sees Miss Collins seated at it.)Well, what are you doing at my desk?
COLLINS:(Rising, frightened.)Why, you told me to sit here, sir.Shall I go to my own desk, sir? LAWSON:(Shouting.)YES!(Miss Collins crosses R, to her own desk.)TEDDY:(Crossing to his father's desk.)Did I hear you say YES?
LAWSON: NO!(Writes in checkbook.)
EDITH:(Coming to Teddy C.)Oh, Teddy, I see it all now.“No” meant “Yes”..when you said “no.”
TEDDY: “No”..“Yes”...wait...When I said “No”...when I said...I...(Conflised.)Oh, I only know we are going on a honeymoon.(They kiss and embrace.)
LAWSON:(Rises with check in hand and comes C.)Here's your check.I made it out for ten thousand instead of five, because ten will take you farther away and keep you away longer.TEDDY:(Taking check and looking at it.)Why, Dad!You're wonderful..you're marvelous..you're...(Changing tone.)IS IT GOOD?(Father swells with satisfaction on praise, but turns furiously on last line.)Well, come on, darling.Good-bye, Dad...(They both start for door R.)(Teddy catches hand of Edith who waits for him in door R, and they plunge off happily together.)(Lawson and Miss Collins stare after them, Miss Collins chuckling with delight.)The End
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