第一篇:历年高考生清明节生清明节作文3
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..。..小学生清明节作文3
古人云:“清明时节雨纷纷,路上行人欲断魂,借问酒家何处有,牧童遥指杏花村。”当我想起唐代大诗人的这句诗歌时就想到好像清明节快要到了,清明的脚步已经不远了,只剩下了一步之差。
由于,清明节是在学校过的不能在家里过。在家里,吃上那平时吃不到的的清明果,那可真是佳肴啊!而且不能在家里和家人一起去乡下扫墓(踏青),给死去的故人请安,给他们拜年,送上家中做出来的佳肴——清明果让他们保佑我的学习更好,学业成功。
于是,星期六爸爸在家很空,决定带我回乡下去给奶奶扫墓。我立即拿来自己家里做出来的清明果,拿来一个篮子在下面铺了一张干净的报纸,然后小心翼翼的把清明果平铺在里面,以免发生一想不到的“事故”。最后,我把篮子放在车子的后备箱中。一切准备就绪,我们全家就坐上了车子。在坑坑洼洼的山路上车子不停的颠簸,这时我想起了后备箱中的佳肴非常担心,心急如焚。我叫爸爸开慢些特别是有坑的地方。我们就慢慢悠悠的坐车,就像老牛拖慢腿。
经过,半个小时的颠簸,我们终于到了奶奶的坟前,我拿出清明果放好,拿香深深的鞠了一个躬,拜了几拜。给奶奶请了安,向他问优秀范文版权所有好。对他行完了中华民族的礼仪以后,就拿出鞭炮“劈劈啪啪”的响了起来。那声音震耳欲聋,就像天上打雷一样。把弟弟吓的呜呜大哭起来。后来我又默默的在坟墓前许愿“希望奶奶能保佑我学习快些进步,全家生活快乐,身体健康,学业有成”。(上坟的经过不具体)
不愧这是我们中华民族的一种传统节日啊,是那么的有意义,比平常好多了了,是那么的有趣不同寻常。又有活动,又有学问,还有佳肴。是一个与其他节日不同的节日。比西方节日有趣多,有深刻的意
义。春节作文
写春节作文前,我们可以先回忆下过春节是我们参加过的活动,如贴倒福、分压岁钱、吃饺子、掸扬尘、贴年画、贴剪纸、放鞭炮、守岁、给压岁钱、挂千千结、贴春联等,然后挑一个我们印象深刻的上网查些资料,可以到百度搜春节的八个习俗,春节的由来与传说等,也可以上作文网作文素材频道找到相关资料再进行介绍。
作文题目可以自拟,如欢度春节,春节游文庙,除夕之夜,美丽的春节,春节花会
开头部分:大致介绍一下春节,及春节的一些习俗,点明你所要介绍的习俗。(略写)
第二部分:介绍这一习俗的来历、象征意义等,像剪纸、年画、千千结等还可以写写这些物品的种类、样子等。(详细)
第三部分:回忆自己参与这一活动的情景。(详细)
结尾结尾部分:写写自己对这一习俗的感受。
每个部分举例:
开头部分:大致介绍一下春节,及春节的一些习俗,点明你所要介绍的习俗。(略写)
例:元宵节是我国的四大节日之一,元宵节一过,春节也就算过完了,所以这一天是非常隆重和热闹的。过元宵节的节目丰富多彩,有充满乐趣的看花灯猜灯谜,有喜气洋洋的舞龙,还有热闹非凡的赛龙船。不过,最吸引我们小孩子的却是那多姿多彩的烟花。
第二部分:介绍这一习俗的来历、象征意义等,像剪纸、年画、千千结等还可以写写这些物品的种类、样子等。(详细)
例:春联代表着欢乐祥和。在我们中国,每逢春节,无论城市还是农村,家家户户都要精选一副大红春联贴在门上,为节日增加喜庆的气氛。一幅幅春联不仅带来了吉祥和祝福,还带来了中国古老的浓浓的文化气息。瞧!“大地春光好,长天晓日红”、“岁岁皆如意,年年尽平安”、“江山万里如画,神州四时皆春”、“春风送春处处***美,喜鹊报喜家家喜事多”…… 幅幅春联让千家万户喜气盈门。春联的种类比较多。按照使用场所,可分为门心、框对、横批、春条、斗方等。因此,贴的位置也不同,如“门心”贴在门板上端中心部位;“横批”贴在门楣的横木上。
第三部分:回忆自己参与这一活动的情景。(详细)
例:记得去年元宵节的晚上爸爸妈妈带我去工人体育馆看烟花。八点整,只听见几声沉闷的声音,一个个烟花带着红红的火星窜上了天空,几声脆响,夜空绽放出几朵美丽的花朵。它们的形状和颜色各不相同,有五颜六色的满天星,金黄色的蒲公英,紫色的牵牛花,火红的玫瑰花,粉红的月季、银色的百合,真是绚丽多彩。随着一声声的炮响,人们在惊呼,在赞叹,夜色中,人们微微扬起的脸上也变幻着多姿的色彩,露出了幸福的笑容……
结尾结尾部分:写写自己对这一习俗的感受。
例:我看着那散发着传统文化芳香的中华结,仿佛品味到了中华民族远古的神秘和东方的灵秀。它的古香古色,它的千变万化,让我神往,让我遐想……
《春节的街头》
今天,是中国传统节日——春节。早晨我还没醒,就听到了鞭炮的声音。平静的社区,今日显得热闹非凡。这热闹的喧嚣,把我的睡意一股脑的全都打撒开来。于是,起床穿上了新衣服连早饭都来不及吃就冲到门外,看着各家各户的炮竹,烟花。接着就是跟爸爸妈妈一起去走街串巷——拜年!
“李伯伯,新年快乐”“王阿姨,工作顺了”“刘奶奶,身体健康”〃〃〃跟所有的长辈们拜过年之后,妈妈提议说:一会,去街上看看,感受下新年的气氛。一上街,街上可就更热闹了。人们手里有提着大袋大袋的菜,身边的孩子手上握着一大把小花炮,蹦蹦跳跳地跑着。看!我左边的一位四、五岁左右的小女孩,跑到前面去。一下子又转过头对一位满手是鼓鼓的袋子的大人喊着:“爸爸,快点!我要回去放炮玩呢!”。有拿着那边超市发的小气球的,红的,黄的,绿的,还有蓝的。也有三五成群,手挽着手说说笑笑的姑娘们,小伙子们,忙绿了一年,辛苦了一年,我想这个时候应该是大家最放松,最高兴的时候。你看,路灯上还挂着两个小红灯,喜气洋洋的。就像在说,“我们也要过新年,我们也要过新年”。
一进菜市场,那才更热闹呢!人流窜动,一眼望去,什么也看不见,全是人。还有那翠绿的黄瓜,可真新鲜哪,你看,那金黄色的小花在太阳的照射下显得多么的生机勃勃啊。那鲫鱼,鲢鱼,青鱼,草鱼等等在水里游来游去,真是印证了我们中国的老话:年年有鱼(余)!黄的韭菜,红的番茄,黑的木耳,白的萝卜〃〃〃真是要什么有什么呀。“哎哟!可真够挤的。”我嘀咕了一句。跟着妈妈买了几个我爱吃的菜,结完帐就走出了菜场。超市里的收银台前也早已排起了长龙。傍晚时分,街上,又渐渐安静下来。店主们把店子关了,超市也比往常早了些许关门。大家都提着东西回家过年去了。
到了晚上6点左右,社区渐渐安静,孩子们都回家吃团圆饭去了。吃完团圆饭7、8点的样子社区又重新热闹起来。孩子们全都出来放花炮了。这个放个“降落伞,”那个又放个“天女撒花”〃〃〃〃各式各样的花炮全有。每放完一个都会聚集好几个孩子,他们在讨论谁的花炮最美丽,谁的花炮颜色最多,之后又是阵阵欢笑。大人们或几个坐在一起打牌,打麻将;或几个坐在一起嗑瓜子,剥花生;或看着自己的孩子放花炮,偶尔还要帮他们一下。大多数的孩子,都是自己独立操作完成。
夜,更深了。人们陆陆续续的回家了,有些不肯回家的孩子也在父母的劝说下,不情愿的回了家,一天的热闹景象渐渐被夜幕包围。我不禁感叹又是一年到,时间过得可真快呀!
春节见闻
“当、当、当”新年的钟声敲响了,家家户户的门上早已贴上了或火红或金黄的对联,每一家的老老少少都乐得合不拢嘴。兴奋的孩子们有的目不转睛地盯着电视,品尝着一年一度的晚会大餐――春节晚会;有的急着给自己的长辈拜年,发短信,打电话,所有新年的祝福话语仿佛怎么也说不完;调皮的孩子正在向自己的父辈们 “讨要”压岁钱;屋外的鞭炮声此起彼伏,炸开了锅,五彩的烟花更是把这个特殊的夜晚点缀得绚丽多姿。
正月初一,农历新年的第一天迎着人们的喜悦祥和而来。我这个平时最赖床的懒汉,今天却起了个大早,因为我极想穿上我那美丽的新衣,出去好好炫耀一
翻。我要去走亲访友拜新年了,这无疑也是一件高兴的事。我们小孩子走在拜年队伍的前面,见到长辈们拜个年,说几句吉利话,就可以收获一大把的压岁钱,然后拿到街上去买自己喜爱的东西――玩具、零食、鞭炮……,家长好像变了个人似的,对我们的放纵是那么的宽容,一切都有了!这就是过年的感觉。
“放鞭炮喽!”不知是谁喊了一声,小孩子们很快都聚在了一起。一串串鞭炮在人们手中点燃,响声震天,四处飞溅,仿佛要把一个个美好的愿望送到千家万户。一阵阵炮竹声接连不断,热闹非凡。
到了吃饭的时候,望着满桌子平时最爱吃的菜肴,我们小孩子却一点儿也不觉得饿。大人们在推杯换盏之间,谈论最多是:今非昔比啊!今天的幸福生活从餐桌上最能说明问题,现在人们生活好了,天天就像在过年!
奔波在走亲访友的路途上,我见到了春意盎然的田间大地,一条条新修的高速公路缩短了我们的行程,通往乡村的泥巴路也被“村村通”的水泥路所覆盖,城市高楼大厦像雨后春笋,一年一个变化……
春节对于我们小孩子来说,那就是一切都在变化,一切都是新的!
第二篇:小学模拟生清明节作文3
小学生清明节作文3
古人云:“清明时节雨纷纷,路上行人欲断魂,借问酒家何处有,牧童遥指杏花村。”当我想起唐代大诗人的这句诗歌时就想到好像清明节快要到了,清明的脚步已经不远了,只剩下了一步之差。
由于,清明节是在学校过的不能在家里过。在家里,吃上那平时吃不到的的清明果,那可真是佳肴啊!而且不能在家里和家人一起去乡下扫墓(踏青),给死去的故人请安,给他们拜年,送上家中做出来的佳肴——清明果让他们保佑我的学习更好,学业成功。
于是,星期六爸爸在家很空,决定带我回乡下去给奶奶扫墓。我立即拿来自己家里做出来的清明果,拿来一个篮子在下面铺了一张干净的报纸,然后小心翼翼的把清明果平铺在里面,以免发生一想不到的“事故”。最后,我把篮子放在车子的后备箱中。一切准备就绪,我们全家就坐上了车子。在坑坑洼洼的山路上车子不停的颠簸,这时我想起了后备箱中的佳肴非常担心,心急如焚。我叫爸爸开慢些特别是有坑的地方。我们就慢慢悠悠的坐车,就像老牛拖慢腿。
经过,半个小时的颠簸,我们终于到了奶奶的坟前,我拿出清明果放好,拿香深深的鞠了一个躬,拜了几拜。给奶奶请了安,向他问优秀范文版权所有好。对他行完了中华民族的礼仪以后,就拿出鞭炮“劈劈啪啪”的响了起来。那声音震耳欲聋,就像天上打雷一样。把弟弟吓的呜呜大哭起来。后来我又默默的在坟墓前许愿“希望奶奶能保佑我学习快些进步,全家生活快乐,身体健康,学业有成”。(上坟的经过不具体)
不愧这是我们中华民族的一种传统节日啊,是那么的有意义,比平常好多了了,是那么的有趣不同寻常。又有活动,又有学问,还有佳肴。是一个与其他节
日不同的节日。比西方节日有趣多,有深刻的意义。
第三篇:清明节演讲稿3
《革命烈士永垂不朽》
尊敬的老师们、亲爱的同学们:
我是来自五年级二班的,今天我演讲的题目是《革命烈士永垂不朽》
时届清明,日暖风熏,翠柏凝春,更显得郁郁葱葱。今天我们怀着无比崇敬的心情,深切缅怀革命先烈们的丰功伟绩和音容笑貌,表达我们的思念之情,告慰他们的在天之灵。
忆往昔,在血雨腥风的战争岁月里,中华大地上无数优秀儿女为了民族的解放事业,为了国家的和平统一,为了实现最广大人民群众的根本利益,不惜抛头颅,洒热血,赴汤蹈火,舍身取义,矢志不渝,用他们宝贵的青春和热血,谱写了可歌可泣的壮丽诗篇,为我们创造了美好的生活和发展环境,可以说,为了民族的解放和社会主义建设事业,无数英勇的儿女不畏艰难,前仆后继,抛头颅,洒热血,献出了宝贵的生命和青春年华,他们是中华民族的骄傲,是中华民族的宝贵精神财富,在他们身上体现了崇高的爱国主义精神,体现了英雄斗争坚贞不屈的革命气节,体现了勇于献身、甘于奉献的大无畏精神,是我们学习的榜样,这种精神在祖国建设发展的各个时期显示了极大的凝聚力和号召力,也为实现国家发展提供了巨大精神动力。
缅怀先烈、不忘历史、珍惜现在、走向未来,意义更是十分重大。今天站在庄严肃穆的烈士墓前,我们每一个小学生更应深深的思考:清明节应该怎么过?祭扫的意义何在?是的,祭扫不是休闲活动,不是封建迷信,而是一种缅怀,是为了对先人好思想好作风好品质的传承。缅怀先烈,更是为了弘扬伟大的爱国主义精神。从这个意义上来说,当我们站在先烈们的墓前,献一束鲜花,捧一把土,决不单是为了行使一种仪式、做出一种姿态,而是为了唤回我们不该失去的记忆,找到继续前进的动力。毛泽东主席的一段话今天想来仍然回味无穷,颇受教育:无数革命先烈,为了人民的利益牺牲了他们的生命,让我们每个活着的人民想起他们就心里非常难过,难道我们还有什么个人利益不能牺牲,还有什么错误不能抛弃吗?祭扫,意味着什么?我想,只要这个答题做得好,我们的爱国主义教育、传统教育就会从一般性的号召而变成实实在在的行动,那样,我们的校风、教风、学风就会更好!缅怀先烈的丰功伟绩,憧憬着美好的将来,我们必定会以自己的实际行动来证明一切。时光漫漫,许多东西都会如同过眼浮云,稍纵即逝,但祭扫烈士墓所激发出来的坚定信念必将永远铭刻在我们心间,终生不灭!革命烈士永垂不朽!我的演讲完毕!谢谢大家!
第四篇:关于清明节扫墓作文300字.3
愚人节英语作文1000字
Media April Fool's Day Ten classic prank
From television revealing that spaghetti grows on trees to advertisements for the left-handed burger, the tradition of April Fool's Day stories in the media has a weird and wonderful history.Here are several of the top ten April Fool's Day pranks ever pulled off, as judged by the US website of Museum of Hoaxes for their notoriety, absurdity, and number of people duped.Swiss spaghetti harvest tops the hoax list.In 1957, a BBC television show announced that thanks to a mild winter and the virtual elimination of the spaghetti weevil, Swiss farmers were enjoying a bumper spaghetti crop.Footage of Swiss farmers pulling strands of spaghetti from trees prompted a barrage of calls from people wanting to know how to grow their own spaghetti at home.Instant color TV sets in Sweden comes as the third.Sweden in 1962 had only one television channel, which broadcast in black and white.The station's technical expert appeared on the news to announce that thanks to a newly developed technology, viewers could convert their existing sets to receive color pictures by pulling a nylon stocking over the screen.US ex-president Nixon's comeback is placed at sixth.In 1992, US National Public Radio announced that Richard Nixon was running for president again.His new campaign slogan was, “I didn't do anything wrong, and I won't do it again.” They even had clips of Nixon announcing his candidacy.Listeners flooded the show with calls expressing their outrage.Nixon's voice actually turned out to be that of impersonator Rich Little.In 1998, a newsletter titled New Mexicans for Science and Reason carried an
article that the state of Alabama had voted to change the value of pi from
3.14159 to the “Biblical value” of 3.0.Burger King, an American fast-food chain, published a full-page
advertisement in USA Today in 1998 announcing the introduction of the “Left-Handed Whopper,” specially designed for the 32 million left-handed
Americans.According to the advertisement, the new burger included the same ingredients as the original, but the condiments were rotated 180 degrees.The chain said it received thousands of requests for the new burger, as well as orders for the original “right-handed” version.Discover Magazine announced in 1995 that a highly respected biologist, Aprile Pazzo(Italian for April Fool), had discovered a new species in Antarctica: the hotheaded naked ice borer.The creatures were described as having bony plates on their heads that became burning hot, allowing the animals to bore through ice at high speed.Noted British astronomer Patrick Moore announced on the radio in 1976 that at 9:47 am, a once-in-a-lifetime astronomical event, in which Pluto would pass behind Jupiter, would cause a gravitational alignment that would reduce the Earth's gravity.Moore told listeners that if they jumped in the air at the exact moment of the planetary alignment, they would experience a floating sensation.Hundreds of people called in to report feeling the sensation.愚人节英语作文400字
celebrate April Fools' Day
In the 16th century, people celebrated New Year's Day from March 25 to April
1.In the mid—1560s King Charles IX changed it from March 25 to January 1.But some people still celebrated in on April 1, so others called them April Fools.Each country celebrates April Fools' Day differently.In France, people call the
April Fools “April Fish”.They tape a paper fish to their friends' backs to fool them.When he or she finds this , they shout “April Fish!”
In England, people play jokes only in the morning.You are a “noodle” if
someone fools you.In Scotland, April Fools' Day is 48 hours long.They call an April Fool “April Gowk”.Gowk is another name for a cuckoo bird.In the America, people play small jokes on their friends and any other people on the first of Aprol.They may point down to your shoe and say, “ Your shoelace is untied.” If you believe them and look down to see, you are an April Fool then.愚人节英语作文800字
April Fools'Day:A Great Trick
April 1st or“April Fools' Day” is a day of trickery? in the United States.Young students to older professionals? will use this day as a time to play funny tricks? on their fellow students and colleagues?.While sometimes these tricks get a bit mean, the day is really meant for playing light-hearted jokes on other people.One of the best April Fools' jokes I have ever seen was at my university.My English professor? came into the class two days after we had all taken an exam and said“I have some very bad news for everyone.It seems that either I am not a good teacher or no one in this class is studying hard enough.I regret ?to inform? you that everyone in this class has failed the exam.” Since this was one of three major? exams we had to take in the class, failing the test meant that our final? grades would be very low.Everyone in the class had this near death look on their face?.The rest of the class-45 minutes to be exact?-everyone just sat shocked? waiting for the period to end.Just to note, I had studied several days for the exam and felt confident? I was going to do very well.At the end of the class, our English professor said, “You guys? need to study
harder next time.This class is not a joke.“ With that everyone walked out not saying a word.Later that evening, I checked? my universities telephone message system? and there was a message from my professor.I was really nervous? thinking that he would ask me to visit him in his office(maybe I did worse than everyone else I thought).I clicked #1 on the message system? and waited to hear what he had to say.His message was simple,”April Fools' Ladies and Gentleman.I can't believe you all feel for it.Hahaha.You all did well on the exam and I am proud of? you.Hahaha!“
Happy April Fools' Day Everyone!
愚人节英语作文600字
The History of April Fools Day
”The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.“--Mark Twain
How do you think April Fools' Day originated? Did some joker in biblicaltimes decide to switch the frankincense and the myrrh? Was there a historicepidemic of spring fever-tomfoolery in a tiny Finnish town in the early1800s? Did a New Yorker in 1910 find a cockroach in his coffee cup anddecide to recreate the experience for his officemate, thereby sparking afamous April 1 lawsuit? In a convincing testimonial to the saying thattruth is stranger than fiction, we'll tell you the story, or at leastpresent the most viable theory, of how April Fools' Day came to be.Once upon a time, back in 16th-century France, before computers, people celebrated New Year's Day on March 25, the advent of spring.It was afestive time.They partied steadily until April 1.In 1564, when the calendar reformed and became Gregorian, King Charles IXproclaimed, perhaps pompously, that
New Year's Day should be celebrated on January 1 instead of in the spring.Diehard conservatives resisted the change(or perhaps didn't hear about it due to the absence of e-mail)and continued to celebrate New Year's from March 25 to April 1.During this period of spring festivity, the more flexible French mocked the rigidrevelers by sending them foolish gifts and invitations to non-existent parties.The victim of an April Fools' Day prank was called a ”poisson d'avril,“ or an ”April fish,“ because at that time of year, the sun was leaving thezodiacal sign of Pisces.April Fools' Day hit its stride(avoiding thebanana peel)in England in the 18th century, and was brought to colonial America by the English, Scottish, and French.No fooling.愚人节英语作文600字
About April Fools Day
What is April Fools Day and how did it begin? Well, that is a very good question.The origin of this holiday is rather uncertain.However, the common belief holds that during the reformation of the calendar the date for the New Year was moved from April 1st to January 1st.During that time in history there was no television and no radio so word spread slowly.There were also those who chose to simply ignore the change and those who merely forgot.These people were considered ”fools“ and invitations to non-existent parties and other practical jokes were played on them.”All Fools' Day“ is practiced in many parts of the world with practical jokes and sending people on a fool's errand.Another thought is that the origin began with the celebrations of the Spring Equinox.While some believe it has to do the a Roman festival known as Hilaria, the end of the Celtic new year.In Scotland, April Fools Day lasts 48 hours, day two is know as Taily Day and pranks involving the posterior are played.The victim of the practical joke is
referred to as ”hunting the gowk“;the gowk is an extinct cuckoo bird.In France, he is the ”poisson d'Avril“ or ”fish of April.“ The fish in April are newly hatched and easily caught.French children enjoy taping a picture of a fish on their friends back and yelling out ”Poisson dAvril!“ when it is found.Da de los Santos Inocentes is held in Spain on December 28th.This is The Feast of the Holy Innocents.It's celebrated similarly to April Fools' Day with practical jokes.In the United States, pranks are played on just about everybody.Pranks range from the standard ”Your shoe is untied“, to some very creative and
elaborate ideas.The only ”rule" is that no one should be harmed.The best jokes are when everybody including the victim laughs.
第五篇:历年高考生爆笑的妙语录
1。在过去,这样的猛士如雨后春笋般出现在我们的教材上,如炸碉堡的董存瑞,在寒风刺骨的冬天,跳进冰湖去救人的黄继光等。[黄继光不去堵枪眼,跑到冰湖里逞什么能啊?]
2。李煜在唱:载不动,许多愁,恰似一江春水向东流。[是李清照和李煜一起唱的吧?]
3。倘若不是蒙哥马利将军从失败中作出反省继续努力,又怎能在滑铁卢战役中大败拿破仑呢?[拿破仑对蒙哥马利,关公战秦琼。]
4。看着天上阴沉沉的天……[天外有天!]
5。岳飞选择精忠报国,死而后已。他一生征战无数,以至于匈奴兵对他闻风丧胆。[汉时明月宋时关。]
6。战国时期的孟子,早在三千多年前就为我们阐述了怎样选择的关键。[孟子真乃圣人,生在2000多年前,居然可以训示3000多年前的古人。]
7。登山者在暴风雪中作出了自己心灵的选择,拯救了一个濒临死亡的遇难者。[华佗再世,妙手回春!]
8。中国近代史上,被国民party残杀的那一批高级干部……[国民party残杀的不是太平天国的高级干部吧?]
9。考场上,每个考生拿到试卷后都必须做答,其中就有不少选择题……但是不管考场气氛是如何的紧张,心灵受到的压力多么巨大你都必须作出选择,像作出生死抉择一样,你将作出心灵的选择。[惨无人道的考试!]
10。就在这时,一俩[注:原文如此]“中风”牌汽车,正好撞到了丈夫身上。[“中风” 牌汽车?不是拉登驾驶的吧?]
11。适食物者为俊杰,适者生存。[牙好,胃口就好,身体倍儿棒!挑肥拣瘦,不是养生之道。]
12。一位猎人正在森林中追捕一只藏羚羊,肥硕、笨掘的羚羊已经在森林里舍生逃命,周旋了不知多少圈。[舍生逃命?藏羚羊到底是想死还是想活?]
13。映入眼帘的是方格子床单,白色的墙,以及一点一点往下滴的药瓶。[药瓶莫非是沥青做的?]
14。然天公不作美,小小年纪患上了尿毒病。[难怪南方地区洪水连连,原来是天公患了尿毒症。]
15。有一天,母亲高兴的从医院回来,他得知,可以通过换肾手术,使(尿毒病的)儿子重见光明。[您失明了吗?去换肾吧!]
16。“唧”的一声,我来了个紧急刹车,可还是把老太太碰了飞了起来,当中满篮子鸡蛋亦随风飘舞。[好美的鸡蛋!]
17。看过《生死抉择》的人都会被那一幕幕扣人心弦的场面所触动。作为一个Communistparty员的李嘉诚,他为了维护国家利益不受损失,保持一个Communistparty员的忠诚,毅然的作出 “生死抉择”。[红色资本家——李嘉诚]
18。而被流放的屈原,时时不忘报国,终因报国无门,而自吻[注:原文如此。]于乌江。[至今思项羽,不肯过江东!]
19。面对即将冻死而又素未蒙面的人,登山者,放弃了独个人离开的想法。[今天,你蒙面了吗?]
20。假如你面对的是一位美女,请不要选他,因为她身后就是那可怕的野兽。[深刻!]
21。要瓦解台湾还不容易,派他几十万Communistparty去,吃也要吃穷他们![好办法!]
22。让爱充溢我们的心灵,它会让我们叫老乞丐一声“爷爷”。[多有礼貌的孩子!]
23。邓稼先的历尽千辛也毅然回国的“恋母情结”……[弗洛伊德的传人!]
24。大地震来临的时候……昏天黑日,砂尘飞暴,鸡犬狗鸣,乱七八九糟。[我的头有点乱!]
25。小舅子痛我,经常给我买礼物,这时小舅子掉转话题对我爸说:“岳父,这个工程…… ”[我没看懂,您搞清其间的关系了吗?]
26。解放军官兵……与洪魔抗争,往往是大堤一决口,他们就开工。[解放军官兵是包工头手下的工程队啊?]
27。突然,见一辆摩擦车冲了过来,那车上没人,司机死死地拉着车跑,我把朋友摔到一旁,猛冲过去,把油门关了,车马上就停了。[生死时速!]
28。面黄肌瘦的她妈三十多岁就如五岁的外形。[浓缩才是精华!]
29。让人伤痛欲切的是,在一个寒冷的冬夜,她父亲深夜从工地返回而遭车祸,不久后长睡下去了。[叫醒他!]
30。“汉奸”是xx时期为中国人民丢脸、完全丧失尊严的人,但现在出现了一些“新时代汉奸”——服务小姐,她们为了向一些外国人索要小费竟无顾自己的尊严、民族的尊严。[哦,原来我们身边隐藏了这么多敌人!]
31。2060年早晨,太原九泉太空装置发射基地。[是阎罗王建立的吧!]
32。我现在回想,我国的素质太差了,我不是讲我国差,这是有些地方的弊端,也是国民的一个先例。[您到底在说什么?]
33。一位病人,他的骨髓出问题,但是又没有抓到一位合适的人给他贡献骨髓。[继续抓,派pol。ice守住车站、码头、路口,直到抓到合适的为止。]
34。一个萧条的年轻人孤独的走在寒冷的大街上。[可怜的孩子!]
35。忽然,汽车停了下来,上来了三个年青年,一脸的不正气……这时,列车员也发出了警告:“小心扒手……”[不知道作者坐的到底是火车还是汽车!]
36。记得鲁迅先生曾说过这样一句话:走自己的路,让别人去说吧。[不要载赃,但丁会有意见的!]
37。他白天上学和打工挣钱,晚上就在阳光下偷看书……最后,它成为俄国的奠基人——高尔基。[晚上的阳光不知道晒不晒人?]
38。一切都明白了,明白了,原来妈妈的病根就在于环境的破坏……没有我们的乱排乱放,妈妈的眼睛会变得模糊不清、布满血丝吗?没有我们子女的破坏植被,妈妈的脸会被日光暴晒、风侵雨蚀而变得皱纹满面?没有我们的砍伐森林,树林光合作用产生的氧气会变少吗?妈妈会感到呼吸困难,心慌气短吗?…… [孩子,你不要自责了,没必要所有问题都自己扛!]
39。中国人的综合素质在降低,罪魁祸首为计划生育。[高见!报告国务院,取消“计划生育”这一基本国策!]
40。这天,我和他来到经常光顾的“琴河”游泳……我被海草绊住了。[海草长到内河里,生态失衡了。]
41。古人云:送之毫厘,收之东隅。[看不懂!]
42。纵然古今,为艺术而终珍不昧的贝多芬,舍身zhadiao堡的董存瑞,为现代建设的Dengxp,为科学事业奉献的孔繁森等人的人物形象限入我的眼帘,我的心开始巨痛了。[孔繁森不是研究*********献身的吧?]
43。在秦朝时,秦孝公运用管仲的“商鞅变化[注:原文如此]”使国富兵强。[到底谁在变法?]
44。(911事件中)眼睁睁的看着白宫倒闭,是多么的神秘。[白宫倒闭,多么伟大的预言!]
45。突然,乘客中走出一位军人,他向机长走去,并从腰中掏出一把手机,对准机长的胸口 ……[我一直想不通为什么乘飞机不能开手机,原来是怕乘客用它来劫机啊!]
46。起初,我的心降到了珠穆朗玛峰最底峰……[珠穆朗玛峰最底峰在哪里?东经?北纬?]
47。在某戒毒所,一位戒了毒的年青人对长官说……[这是国民party的戒毒所吧?]
48。我和大伯分手时大伯对我说了一句:您真是个好孩子……[这个大伯还真有礼貌!]
49。那些选择了金钱美色的人们,你们扪心自问一下,你们快乐嘛!你们高兴嘛!如果你的回答是肯定的,那你一定不是人……[如此斩钉截铁,令我非常惭愧!不瞒您说,面对金钱美女,我也动心啊!]
50。孔子小时候,它与哥哥分梨子,一个大的,一个小的,他妈妈让他选择,他只拿了一个小的,这就是有名的孔融让梨的故事,并非孔子只不完那个大梨子,而是他自小就有着这种正确的选择,以至后来,成为了中国历史上伟大的思想家。[我明白了,孔融原来就是孔子!]