TED英语演讲稿：解密爱情与出轨

第一篇：TED英语演讲稿：解密爱情与出轨

I'd like to talk today about the two biggest social trends in the coming century, and perhaps in the next 10,000 years.But I want to start with my work on romantic love, because that's my most recent work.What I and my colleagues did was put 32 people, who were madly in love, into a functional MRI brain scanner.17 who were madly in love and their love was accepted;and 15 who were madly in love and they had just been dumped.And so I want to tell you about that first, and then go on into where I think love is going.“What 'tis to love?” Shakespeare said.I think our ancestors--I think human beings have been wondering about this question since they sat around their campfires or lay and watched the stars a million years ago.I started out by trying to figure out what romantic love was by looking at the last 45 years of research on--just the psychological research--and as it turns out, there's a very specific group of things that happen when you fall in love.The first thing that happens is what I call--a person begins to take on what I call, “special meaning.” As a truck driver once said to me, he said, “The world had a new center, and that center was Mary Anne.”

George Bernard Shaw said it a little differently.He said, “Love consists of overestimating the differences between one woman and another.” And indeed, that's what we do.(Laughter)And then you just focus on this person.You can list what you don't like about them, but then you sweep that aside and focus on what you do.As Chaucer said, “Love is blind.”

In trying to understand romantic love, I decided I would read poetry from all over the world, and I just want to give you one very short poem from eighth-century China, because it's an almost perfect example of a man who is focused totally on a particular woman.It's a little bit like when you are madly in love with somebody and you walk into a parking lot--their car is different from every other car in the parking lot.Their wine glass at dinner is different from every other wine glass at the dinner party.And in this case, a man got hooked on a bamboo sleeping mat.And it goes like this.It's by a guy called Yuan Chen: “I cannot bear to put away the bamboo sleeping mat.The night I brought you home, I watched you roll it out.” He became hooked on a sleeping mat, probably because of elevated activity of dopamine in his brain, just like with you and me.But anyway, not only does this person take on special meaning, you focus your attention on them.You aggrandize them.But you have intense energy.As one polynesian said, he said, “I felt like jumping in the sky.” You're up all night.You're walking till dawn.You feel intense elation when things are going well;mood swings into horrible despair when things are going poorly.Real dependence on this person.As one businessman in New York said to me, he said, “Anything she liked, I liked.” Simple.Romantic love is very simple.You become extremely sexually possessive.You know, if you're just sleeping with somebody casually, you don't really care if they're sleeping with somebody else.But the moment you fall in love, you become extremely sexually possessive of them.I think that that is a Darwinian--there's a Darwinian purpose to this.The whole point of this is to pull two people together strongly enough to begin to rear babies as a team.But the main characteristics of romantic love are craving: an intense craving to be with a particular person, not just sexually, but emotionally.You'd much rather--it would be nice to go to bed with them, but you want them to call you on the telephone, to invite you out, etc., to tell you that they love you.The other main characteristic is motivation.The motor in your brain begins to crank, and you want this person.And last but not least, it is an obsession.When I put these people in the machine, before I put them in the MRI machine, I would ask them all kinds of questions.But my most important question was always the same.It was: “What percentage of the day and night do you think about this person?” And indeed, they would say, “All day.All night.I can never stop thinking about him or her.”

And then, the very last question I would ask them--I would always have to work myself up to this question, because I am not a psychologist.I don't work with people in any kind of traumatic situation.And my final question was always the same.I would say, “Would you die for him or her?” And, indeed, these people would say “Yes!” as if I had asked them to pass the salt.I was just staggered by it.So we scanned their brains, looking at a photograph of their sweetheart and looking at a neutral photograph, with a distraction task in between.So we could look at the same brain when it was in that heightened state and when it was in a resting state.And we found activity in a lot of brain regions.In fact, one of the most important was a brain region that becomes active when you feel the rush of cocaine.And indeed, that's exactly what happens.I began to realize that romantic love is not an emotion.In fact, I had always thought it was a series of emotions, from very high to very low.But actually, it's a drive.It comes from the motor of the mind, the wanting part of the mind, the craving part of the mind.The kind of mind--part of the mind--when you're reaching for that piece of chocolate, when you want to win that promotion at work.The motor of the brain.It's a drive.And in fact, I think it's more powerful than the sex drive.You know, if you ask somebody to go to bed with you, and they say, “No, thank you,” you certainly don't kill yourself or slip into a clinical depression.But certainly, around the world, people who are rejected in love will kill for it.people live for love.They kill for love.They die for love.They have songs, poems, novels, sculptures, paintings, myths, legends.In over 175 societies, people have left their evidence of this powerful brain system.I have come to think it's one of the most powerful brain systems on earth for both great joy and great sorrow.And I've also come to think that it's one of three basically different brain systems that evolved from mating and reproduction.One is the sex drive: the craving for sexual gratification.W.H.Auden called it an “intolerable neural itch,” and indeed, that's what it is.It keeps bothering you a little bit, like being hungry.The second of these three brain systems is romantic love: that elation, obsession of early love.And the third brain system is attachment: that sense of calm and security you can feel for a long-term partner.And I think that the sex drive evolved to get you out there, looking for a whole range of partners.You know, you can feel it when you're just driving along in your car.It can be focused on nobody.I think romantic love evolved to enable you to focus your mating energy on just one individual at a time, thereby conserving mating time and energy.And I think that attachment, the third brain system, evolved to enable you to tolerate this human being--(Laughter)--at least long enough to raise a child together as a team.So with that preamble, I want to go into discussing the two most profound social trends.One of the last 10,000 years and the other, certainly of the last 25 years, that are going to have an impact on these three different brain systems: lust, romantic love and deep attachment to a partner.The first is women working, moving into the workforce.I've looked at 130 societies through the demographic yearbooks of the United Nations.And everywhere in the world, 129 out of 130 of them, women are not only moving into the job market--sometimes very, very slowly, but they are moving into the job market--and they are very slowly closing that gap between men and women in terms of economic power, health and education.It's very slow.For every trend on this planet, there's a counter-trend.We all know of them, but nevertheless--the Arabs say, “The dogs may bark, but the caravan moves on.” And, indeed, that caravan is moving on.Women are moving back into the job market.And I say back into the job market, because this is not new.For millions of years, on the grasslands of Africa, women commuted to work to gather their vegetables.They came home with 60 to 80 percent of the evening meal.The double income family was the standard.And women were regarded as just as economically, socially and sexually powerful as men.In short, we're really moving forward to the past.Then, women's worst invention was the plow.With the beginning of plow agriculture, men's roles became extremely powerful.Women lost their ancient jobs as collectors, but then with the industrial revolution and the post-industrial revolution they're moving back into the job market.In short, they are acquiring the status that they had a million years ago, 10,000 years ago, 100,000 years ago.We are seeing now one of the most remarkable traditions in the history of the human animal.And it's going to have an impact.I generally give a whole lecture on the impact of women on the business community.I'll only just say a couple of things, and then go on to sex and love.There's a lot of gender differences;anybody who thinks men and women are alike simply never had a boy and a girl child.I don't know why it is that they want to think that men and women are alike.There's much we have in common, but there's a whole lot that we do not have in common.We are--in the words of Ted Hughes, “I think that we were built to be--we're like two feet.We need each other to get ahead.” But we did not evolve to have the same brain.And we're finding more and more and more gender differences in the brain.I'll only just use a couple and then move on to sex and love.One of them is women's verbal ability.Women can talk.Women's ability to find the right word rapidly, basic articulation goes up in the middle of the menstrual cycle, when estrogen levels peak.But even at menstruation, they're better than the average man.Women can talk.They've been doing it for a million years;words were women's tools.They held that baby in front of their face, cajoling it, reprimanding it, educating it with words.And, indeed, they're becoming a very powerful force.Even in places like India and Japan, where women are not moving rapidly into the regular job market, they're moving into journalism.And I think that the television is like the global campfire.We sit around it and it shapes our minds.Almost always, when I'm on TV, the producers who call me, who negotiate what we're going to say, is a woman.In fact, Solzhenitsyn once said, “To have a great writer is to have another government.”

Today 54 percent of people who are writers in America are women.It's one of many, many characteristics that women have that they will bring into the job market.They've got incredible people skills, negotiating skills.They're highly imaginative.We now know the brain circuitry of imagination, of long-term planning.They tend to be web thinkers.Because the female parts of the brain are better connected, they tend to collect more pieces of data when they think, put them into more complex patterns, see more options and outcomes.They tend to be contextual, holistic thinkers, what I call web thinkers.Men tend to--and these are averages--tend to get rid of what they regard as extraneous, focus on what they do, and move in a more step-by-step thinking pattern.They're both perfectly good ways of thinking.We need both of them to get ahead.In fact, there's many more male geniuses in the world.When the--and there's also many more male idiots in the world.(Laughter)When the male brain works well, it works extremely well.And what I really think that we're doing is, we're moving towards a collaborative society, a society in which the talents of both men and women are becoming understood and valued and employed.But in fact, women moving into the job market is having a huge impact on sex and romance and family life.Foremost, women are starting to express their sexuality.I'm always astonished when people come to me and say, “Why is it that men are so adulterous?” And I say, “Why do you think more men are adulterous than women?” “Oh, well--men are more adulterous!” And I say, “Who do you think these men are sleeping with?” And--basic math!(Laughter)

Anyway.In the Western world, women start sooner at sex, have more partners, express less remorse for the partners that they do, marry later, have fewer children, leave bad marriages in order to get good ones.We are seeing the rise of female sexual expression.And, indeed, once again we're moving forward to the kind of sexual expression that we probably saw on the grasslands of Africa a million years ago, because this is the kind of sexual expression that we see in hunting and gathering societies today.We're also returning to an ancient form of marriage equality.They're now saying that the 21st century is going to be the century of what they call the “symmetrical marriage,” or the “pure marriage,” or the “companionate marriage.” This is a marriage between equals, moving forward to a pattern that is highly compatible with the ancient human spirit.We're also seeing a rise of romantic love.91 percent of American women and 86 percent of American men would not marry somebody who had every single quality they were looking for in a partner, if they were not in love with that person.people around the world, in a study of 37 societies, want to be in love with the person that they marry.Indeed, arranged marriages are on their way off this braid of human life.I even think that marriages might even become more stable because of the second great world trend.The first one being women moving into the job market, the second one being the aging world population.They're now saying that in America, that middle age should be regarded as up to age 85.Because in that highest age category of 76 to 85, as much as 40 percent of people have nothing really wrong with them.So we're seeing there's a real extension of middle age.And I looked--for one of my books, I looked at divorce data in 58 societies.And as it turns out, the older you get, the less likely you are to divorce.So the divorce rate right now is stable in America, and it's actually beginning to decline.It may decline some more.I would even say that with Viagra, estrogen replacement, hip replacements and the incredibly interesting women--women have never been as interesting as they are now.Not at any time on this planet have women been so educated, so interesting, so capable.And so I honestly think that if there really was ever a time in human evolution when we have the opportunity to make good marriages, that time is now.However, there's always kinds of complications in this.In these three brain systems: lust, romantic love and attachment--don't always go together.They can go together, by the way.That's why casual sex isn't so casual.With orgasm you get a spike of dopamine.Dopamine's associated with romantic love, and you can just fall in love with somebody who you're just having casual sex with.With orgasm, then you get a real rush of oxytocin and vasopressin--those are associated with attachment.This is why you can feel such a sense of cosmic union with somebody after you've made love to them.But these three brain systems: lust, romantic love and attachment, aren't always connected to each other.You can feel deep attachment to a long-term partner while you feel intense romantic love for somebody else, while you feel the sex drive for people unrelated to these other partners.In short, we're capable of loving more than one person at a time.In fact, you can lie in bed at night and swing from deep feelings of attachment for one person to deep feelings of romantic love for somebody else.It's as if there's a committee meeting going on in your head as you are trying to decide what to do.So I don't think, honestly, we're an animal that was built to be happy;we are an animal that was built to reproduce.I think the happiness we find, we make.And I think, however, we can make good relationships with each other.So I want to conclude with two things.I want to conclude with a worry--I have a worry--and with a wonderful story.The worry is about antidepressants.Over 100 million prescriptions of antidepressants are written every year in the United States.And these drugs are going generic.They are seeping around the world.I know one girl who's been on these antidepressants, serotonin-enhancing--SSRI, serotonin-enhancing antidepressants--since she was 13.She's 23.She's been on them ever since she was 13.I've got nothing against people who take them short term, when they're going through something perfectly horrible.They want to commit suicide or kill somebody else.I would recommend it.But more and more people in the United States are taking them long term.And indeed, what these drugs do is raise levels of serotonin.And by raising levels of serotonin, you suppress the dopamine circuit.Everybody knows that.Dopamine is associated with romantic love.Not only do they suppress the dopamine circuit, but they kill the sex drive.And when you kill the sex drive, you kill orgasm.And when you kill orgasm, you kill that flood of drugs associated with attachment.The things are connected in the brain.And when you tamper with one brain system, you're going to tamper with another.I'm just simply saying that a world without love is a deadly place.So now--(Applause)--thank you.I want to end with a story.And then, just a comment.I've been studying romantic love and sex and attachment for 30 years.I'm an identical twin;I am interested in why we're all alike.Why you and I are alike, why the Iraqis and the Japanese and the Australian Aborigines and the people of the Amazon River are all alike.And about a year ago, an Internet dating service, Match.com, came to me and asked me if I would design a new dating site for them.I said, “I don't know anything about personality.You know? I don't know.Do you think you've got the right person?” They said, “Yes.” It got me thinking about why it is that you fall in love with one person rather than another.That's my current project;it will be my next book.There's all kinds of reasons that you fall in love with one person rather than another.Timing is important.proximity is important.Mystery is important.You fall in love with somebody who's somewhat mysterious, in part because mystery elevates dopamine in the brain, probably pushes you over that threshold to fall in love.You fall in love with somebody who fits within what I call your “love map,” an unconscious list of traits that you build in childhood as you grow up.And I also think that you gravitate to certain people, actually, with somewhat complementary brain systems.And that's what I'm now contributing to this.But I want to tell you a story about--to illustrate.I've been carrying on here about the biology of love.I wanted to show you a little bit about the culture of it, too--the magic of it.It's a story that was told to me by somebody who had heard it just from one of the--probably a true story.It was a graduate student at--I'm at Rutgers and my two colleagues--Art Aron is at SUNY Stony Brook.That's where we put our people in the MRI machine.And this graduate student was madly in love with another graduate student, and she was not in love with him.And they were all at a conference in Beijing.And he knew from our work that if you go and do something very novel with somebody, you can drive up the dopamine in the brain, and perhaps trigger this brain system for romantic love.(Laughter)So he decided he'd put science to work, and he invited this girl to go off on a rickshaw ride with him.And sure enough--I've never been in one, but apparently they go all around the buses and the trucks and it's crazy and it's noisy and it's exciting.And he figured that this would drive up the dopamine, and she would fall in love with him.So off they go and she's squealing and squeezing him and laughing and having a wonderful time.An hour later they get down off of the rickshaw, and she throws her hands up and she says, “Wasn't that wonderful?” And, “Wasn't that rickshaw driver handsome!”(Laughter)(Applause)

There's magic to love!But I will end by saying that millions of years ago, we evolved three basic drives: the sex drive, romantic love and attachment to a long-term partner.These circuits are deeply embedded in the human brain.They're going to survive as long as our species survives on what Shakespeare called “this mortal coil.” Thank you.(Applause)

【中文翻译】

我今天要讲俩个下世纪的大趋势 也很有可能是未来10,000年的趋势 但是，我想首先从我对爱情的研究讲起 因为这是我最近的工作。我和我的同事对32个深陷爱情中的人 进行了功能性核磁共振大脑扫描 这些人中的17个人获取了异性的芳心 其他的15个人则刚刚被甩 所以我想先讲一下这个实验 然后是我对爱情的理解

莎士比亚曾经问道：“爱情是什么?” 我想我们的祖先对这个问题的困惑 从一百万年前他们围坐在篝火边或者躺着看星星时就开始了 为了找到浪漫爱情的内涵 我翻阅了45年来心理学方面的研究成果 发现当人们陷入爱情的时候会发生一些特殊的现象 首先会发生的是 另一个人开始被赋予了“特殊意义” 就像一个卡车司机曾经对我说 我的世界有了一个新的中心，那就是Mary Anne

而萧伯纳用不同的方式表达了同样的意思 他说，爱情中的人会夸大一个女人和另外一个女人的差别 而事实也确实是这样的。(笑声)然后你就会把全部的关注放在这个人身上 虽然你也可以列出你不喜欢他/她的地方 但对缺点马上置之不理，然后全力去爱她/他 就像乔叟说的那样，“爱情是盲目的”

为了理解浪漫爱情 我决定阅读来自世界各地的诗歌 现在我想给你们读一首写于八世纪中国的小诗 因为它几近完美的展现了一个男人是怎样全身心的关注一个女人 就像一个人疯狂的爱上一个人的时候，这个人走进停车场。他会觉得这个人的车与其他任何车都不一样 这个人晚宴上的红酒杯也和其他任何的酒杯不一样 在这个故事里，一个男人迷上了一张竹席

这首诗是诗人元稹所写的： 竹簟衬重茵，未忍都令卷。忆昨初来日，看君自施展 他之所以迷上一个竹席，可能跟你我一样，因为头脑里的多巴胺增多而引起的反应

但不管怎么说，不仅这个人对你来说有特殊的含义 你会全身心的关注他或她。你会对他/她极度的吹捧。而且你的精力旺盛异常 就像一个波利尼亚人说的那样：“我觉得仿佛飞到了空中” 你会整晚都睡不着。你会一直走黎明 当事情进展顺利的时候，你会觉得兴高采烈 当事情不顺利的时候，你又会陷入极度的失望和恐慌。你完全依赖于这个人了 就像一个纽约的商人对我说的，“她喜欢的任何东西我都喜欢” 简单，爱情就是那么简单。

你会对性有极强的占有欲。你知道，如果你只是随随便便和一个人上床，你并不会在意他/她是否和其他人上床 但当你陷入爱情的时候 你对性会有极强的占有欲 我想这种现象是遵循尔达文进化论的，也促进了人类的进化 因为爱情让两个人紧紧绑在了一起，这种关系牢固到足以让两个人在一起生儿育女

但爱情最重要的特征是渴望 对某一个人，不仅是性上的，还包括感情上的渴望。当然能和他/她同床共枕是很好的，但你更期待他/她会给你打电话，约你出去，等等 希望他告诉你他爱你 爱情另外一个主要的特征是动机。你已经迫不及待的开始行动，你想得到这个人。

爱情的最后一个也是同样重要的特征是痴迷 当我让他们进入核磁共振机之前 我会问他们各种各样的问题 但最重要的问题始终是一个 “你一天之中有多少时间是在想念这个人的?” 他们会说，“整天整夜。从来没停止过想念”

然后，我会问他们最后一个问题，我经常会想方设法引导他们去回答这个问题 因为我不是一个心理学家 我没法治愈人们心灵的创伤 这个最后的问题也始终是那一个： “你会为这个人去死吗?” 这些人会说“会的!” 就好像我请他们把盐递给我那样理所当然 对这样的回答，我感到很震惊。

我让他们先看一幅爱人的照片，然后再让他们看一幅不相关的照片，并监测了他们大脑的活动 我们会发现同一个大脑在某一时刻达到最强烈的活动状态 又在什么时候处于休息的状态 我们也发现相当多的大脑区域变得活跃 而事实上我们最关注的一个大脑区域 是那个让你对可卡因感到渴求的大脑区域 而这正是人们看到爱人照片时的反应

我开始意识到浪漫爱情并不仅仅是一种情绪 我曾经认为爱情就是一系列的情绪 从非常强烈到非常微弱的 但事实上，爱情是一种驱动力 它来自于心灵深处的动力 来自于我们内心的欲望，一种强烈的愿望 这种动力，就像你想要得到那一块巧克力一样 就像你想要在工作中获得晋升一样 它在驱动我们的大脑活动，它是我们的驱动力

我认为这种动力比性的动力更为的强大 当你问别人是否愿意和你上床，如果这个人说“不” 你肯定不会因为这个自杀或是患上忧郁症 但在全世界范围内，人们如果被爱拒绝，就会为此而轻生 人们为爱而生，为爱而杀，为爱而死 他们为爱创作了歌曲，诗歌，小说，雕塑，画作，神话故事和传奇 在超过175个社会里，人们都用不同的证据证明了这部分大脑组织是如此强大 让人们大喜大悲 所以我认为它是世上最强大的大脑组织

我认为它是从最初的交配和繁殖 发展而来的最基本的三种不同的大脑组织。其中一种是性欲：对性的一种渴望。W.H.Auden称之为：不能忍受的神经性冲动 确实，它就是那样的。它总是不停的烦扰着你，就像饥饿一样。第二个就是浪漫的爱情： 那种让人欢欣鼓舞，使人痴迷的情窦初开。那第三种就是依赖 那是一种从长期伴侣那里才能体会到的宁静和安全。

我认为就是对性的渴望使你 走出去从人群中寻找伴侣 你知道，在你开车的时候你可以感觉到它 它会使人魂不守舍 而浪漫爱情会使你专注 只与一个人发生关系 因此你储蓄着交配的能量，等待着时机 而第三种大脑系统：依赖 则发展成使你能够对他/她很忍耐(笑声)。这种宽容至少可以帮你撑过抚养小孩的这段时间。

开场白之后，我要讨论两个最显著的社会趋势。其中一个产生于10000年前，另一个则是25年前，这两种趋势都对性欲，爱情，和依赖 这三种不同的脑系统产生过影响。

第一个阶段就是女人开始工作，成为劳动力的一部分。我查过联合国的世界人口统计年鉴中的130-150个国家 发现130个中有129个国家的女性在进入劳动市场 过程可能比较缓慢的，但这个趋势确定无疑 男性与女性之间 经济能力，健康和教育方面的距离正在缩小 这个过程同样非常缓慢

对于地球上出现的每种趋势，总会伴随着一种阻力 对此，我们都很了解，但就像古老的阿拉伯谚语 所说的：“狗会叫吠，但是车队仍在前行。” 事实上也的确如此，这一趋势滚滚向前。女性正在重返劳动市场。我之所以说是重返，因为女性劳动这事并不新鲜。在百万年以来的非洲大地上，女性每天往返于牧场种植收割蔬菜。她们带着60-80%的晚餐回到家 双人收入的家庭才是标准家庭 同时，女性也拥有同男性一样的经济能力，社会能力和选择伴侣的权力 简而言之，我们是返璞归真了

然而，女性最差的发明就是犁 随着犁耕农业社会的开始，男性的所扮演的角色变得出奇的强势 女性失去了其作为收割者原始的工作 但是随着工业革命和后工业革命的产生 女性开始重返劳动市场 简而言之，她们正在获得在百万年前就拥的社会地位和身份 甚至早在10000年甚至100000年前就曾拥有过 我们现在看到的是人类历史上最具标志性的传统之一 而且这个传统正在产生影响

通常，我的整个讲演都可以围绕女性对经济领域的影响，这次我只会举其中几件事来讲，接下来讲爱情和性的部分 男性与女性之间存在很多的差异 那那些认为男人和女人很相似的人肯定没有同时抚养过儿子和女儿 我不知道为什么他们会认为男人和女人是一样的 男人和女人是有很多相同的地方，但是 也有很多不同

正如Ted Hughs 所言，“我们就像人的两只脚一样，需要彼此配合才能继续前行。” 但我们的大脑并没有进化成一样的构造 而且现在正发现越来越多在思想上的差异 我只讲其中几点，然后就将进入到性和爱情的部分 其中一个是女性的语言能力。女人是聊天高手

女性可以迅速找到正确的词汇，最清楚的说明事情 这种能力在月经周期中间雌性激素达到顶峰时提高 但是就算是在月经的时候，她们的表现都比普通男性好 女性擅于交谈 她们早在百万年前就如此，语言是她们的工具 她们面对面的抚养教育小孩 她们用语言哄小孩，骂小孩，教育小孩 然而，女性正在成为一股强大的力量

甚至在一些女性进入普通劳动市场 较慢的国家如印度和日本 女性也进入到了新闻行业 我认为电视就像一个全球的篝火晚会 我们围着它，同时它也在影响着我们的思想 每每在我录制节目时，那些给我打电话商量谈话内容的 制片人几乎都是女性 事实上，Solzhenitsyn曾经说过，“拥有一个伟大的作家就像拥有了另一个政府”

如今在美国54%的作家都是女性 这只是女性拥有的众多特性中的一个 这些特点帮助她们进入到劳动市场 女人拥有非凡的人际技巧和谈判技巧 有着丰富的想象力 想象力和长远计划形成的大脑路线 她们是思路缜密的思考者 因为女性大脑各部分联系的更好 在她们思考的时候，能收集更多的数据 组合成更加的复杂的形式，看到更多选择和结果 她们能进行条理清楚、整体性的思考，称为网络思考者而男人会剔除他们认为不相关的事 只专注于他们正在做的事情，思考方式偏向于按部就班式 这两种思考方式都很好 我们需要他们共同发展 事实上，在这个世界上，男性天才还是偏多的 但是，世界上的白痴也是男性偏多的(笑声)当男性的大脑运行好的时候，可以非常的好 我认为我们正在努力地建立一个合作型社会 一个逐渐认同男性和女性才能的社会 并且给予重视和利用

实际上，女性进入到劳动市场 对性，爱情和家庭生活方面都有重大影响 最明显的，女性开始表现出他们的性欲 我总是很惊讶每当人们这样问我： “为什么男性总是那么的花心?” 我就说“你怎么就认定是男性比女性花心呢?” “显然啊，男性就是比较花心!” 我问他们，“那这些男人是和在什么人上床呢?” 结果显而易见吧(笑声)

不管怎样，在西方世界 女性性成熟较早，她们拥有过更多的性伴侣 且并不会因为自己的“博爱”而自责 她们结婚更晚，小孩较少，为了寻找更好的婚姻而离婚 女性有了更多对性的表达和诉求 的确，我们在性表达上再一次 回到了百万年前非洲大地上的情景 因为这就是以打猎和采摘为生活方式的 社会具有的性表达

我们婚姻的平等状况也正恢复原古时代 有个说法就是，21世纪 的婚姻可以被称为“对等婚姻” “纯洁的婚姻”也可以称为“彼此不承担法律义务的婚姻” 一种在平等主体间建立的婚姻 回到了和远古时代人类精神高度一致的形式

我们也看到了人们对浪漫爱情的追求 美国91%的女性和86%的男性 并不会因为对方具有自己心中的所有品质而结婚 如果他/她们不爱对方 对37个国家的研究发现，世界各地的人们 只希望与他们所爱的人结婚 的确，包办婚姻已经开始淡出历史的舞台

我认为婚姻应该变得更加的稳定 因为我们正面临着第二个巨大趋势 第一个就是女性进入劳动力市场 第二个就是人口老龄化 如今在美国 85岁才能被称为中年 因为，在76到85岁的这个年龄段 40%的人们健康是没有任何问题的 所以，我们看到了中年阶层队伍的扩大

我自己的一本书里面有58个国家的离婚率统计 你可以发现，随着年纪的增大，离婚率也随着降低 所以现在美国的离婚率是稳定的 实际上正在逐渐的降低 未来还会继续下降 而且随着“伟哥”，“雌性激素更新”，“臀部改造”等技术的出现 女性也变得越来越有魅力 女性从未像现在这样有吸引力 没有哪个时期的女性像今天这样如此的有教养，有魅力和有能力 所以我非常确信，在人类进化的历史上 最有条件创造完美婚姻的时机，就是现在!

然而，这个过程还是存在着很多复杂问题 在这三个大脑系统中性，浪漫爱情，和依赖 并不总是结合在一起的 顺便说一下，它们是可以同时存在的 这就是为什么偶然的性爱也不是那么的随便的 随着性高潮的到来，你的身体会释放多巴胺 多巴胺是和浪漫爱情联系在一起的 你会爱上那个刚刚和你“一夜情”的人 同时伴随性高潮，身体还会产生“后叶催产素”和“后叶加压素” 这些都是与“依赖”相关的激素 这就是为什么你与别人发生关系之后，你会感觉到 自己和他/她紧紧的联系在一起

但是这三个情感系统 并不总会绑在一起 你对相处了很久的一个伴侣有很深的依赖和责任感 同时你又强烈的爱着另外的人 同时你可能对第三个人产生性欲 简单的说，我们能在同一时间爱很多人 事实上，当我们晚上躺在床上时 我们可以想着对某人的依赖感 再感受着与某人的浪漫爱情 在你头脑中仿佛在开一个小组会议 因为你需要做一个选择 所以我认为，人类并不是一个被创造出来享受快乐的物种 我们是一种被创造出来繁衍后代的物种 我认为幸福是我们发现，我们创造的 我们可以和每个人建立良好的关系

所以我想以两件事来做总结 一件是让我担忧的事 我有一个担忧，和一个精彩的故事 我的担忧是关于抗抑郁药的 美国每年会开出超过一亿份抗抑郁处方 这些药物正变得很普遍 它们渗入到世界各地 我认识一个女孩从她13岁开始就在服用抗抑郁药 一种用于提升血清素的抗抑郁药物 今年她23岁，她从13岁就开始服用这种药

我不反对那些在短期内因为遇到非常 烦恼的事情而服用抗抑郁药的人 对那些想要自杀或者杀人的患者 我是建议他们服用的 但是越来越多的美国人开始长时期的服用抑郁药 这些药物的作用是提高“血清素”的含量 随着血清素含量的上升，抑制了多巴胺的循环 每个人都知道 多巴胺是与浪漫爱情联系的 抗抑郁药不仅抑制了多巴胺的产生，也使性欲下降 当你的性欲下降时，你将失去性高潮 一旦失去性高潮，那些让你产生依赖感的激素就被遏制 神经系统在大脑里都是相互关联的 其中一个大脑系统被破坏的时侯 另一个系统也将紊乱 我只想说一个没有的爱的世界是没有生机的所以(鼓掌)谢谢 我想以一个故事来结束，然后就是一句评价 我对爱情，性和依赖的研究已经有30年了 我是双胞胎，对为什么我们如此的相像很感兴趣 为什么你和我很像，为什么伊拉克人，日本人 澳大利亚土著人，和亚马孙河流域的人都是那么像

大约一年前，一个网络婚介服务公司Match.com找到我 想让我为他们设计一个新的约会站点 我说：“我对性格一点都不了解，你知道吗?” 我不确定你是否找对了人 他们回答：“是的” 这让我开始思考，为什么你会爱上某一个人而不是另外的人

这是我目前正在研究的课题，也是我下本书的内容 你出于各种理由爱上某个人 时机很重要，距离也很重要 神秘感很重要。你可能由于某个人很神秘而爱上他 因为神秘感可以使你脑中的多巴胺上升 让你越过那道闸门而坠入爱河 你爱上那些正好符合你“爱情地图”的人 他符合你在童年时期潜意识里设定的择偶清单 我还认为，你将会被 那些和你有互补特质的人所吸引 这就是我现在正在努力研究的课题

但是我想告诉你一个故事来说明这个问题 我在这儿谈论的是爱情的生理基础 我想再告诉你们关于文化的一些东西 关于爱情的魔力 这是一个听别人转述的故事 应该是一个真实的故事 是关于一个研究生的，我是Rutgers的，我的两个同事 Art Aaron 是 SUNY Stonybrook的 就是我们为那些人做核磁共振扫描的地方

这个研究生疯狂的爱上了另外一个研究生 但是那个女生并不爱他 后来他们一起去参加一个在北京的研讨会 他从我们的工作中得知，如果你与某人一起做一些非常新鲜的事，可以使那人脑中的多巴胺值上升 这样就很可能引致浪漫爱情的出现(大笑)因此他决定把科学应用到实践中去 所以他约这个女孩一起坐黄包车

我自己从来没做过黄包车 他们穿梭于巴士和卡车之间 非常的疯狂，非常的嘈杂也非常的刺激 男生觉得这样会增加女孩脑中的多巴胺 使女孩子爱上他 一路上，那个女孩兴奋的叫着，靠着他 愉悦享受着美好的时光 一小时后他们下了黄包车 那个女孩举起她的双手问道：“太刺激了，感觉太好了!” “那个车夫好帅哦!”(大笑)(鼓掌)

这就是爱情的魔力 在结束时我要说，在百万年前，人类就发展出三个大脑系统 性欲，爱情和对长期伴侣的依赖 这些循环系统深深扎根于人类的大脑中 它们将与人类一起长期共存 这就是莎士比亚说的“尘世的烦恼” 谢谢。

第二篇：TED英语演讲稿

01.Remember to say thank you

Hi.I'm here to talk to you about the importance of praise, admiration and thank you, and having it be specific and genuine.And the way I got interested in this was, I noticed in myself, when I was growing up, and until about a few years ago, that I would want to say thank you to someone, I would want to praise them, I would want to take in their praise of me and I'd just stop it.And I asked myself, why? I felt shy, I felt embarrassed.And then my question became, am I the only one who does this? So, I decided to investigate.I'm fortunate enough to work in the rehab facility, so I get to see people who are facing life and death with addiction.And sometimes it comes down to something as simple as, their core wound is their father died without ever saying he's proud of them.But then, they hear from all the family and friends that the father told everybody else that he was proud of him, but he never told the son.It's because he didn't know that his son needed to hear it.So my question is, why don't we ask for the things that we need? I know a gentleman, married for 25 years, who's longing to hear his wife say, “Thank you for being the breadwinner, so I can stay home with the kids,” but won't ask.I know a woman who's good at this.She, once a week, meets with her husband and says, “I'd really like you to thank me for all these things I did in the house and with the kids.” And he goes, “Oh, this is great, this is great.” And praise really does have to be genuine, but she takes responsibility for that.And a friend of mine, April, who I've had since kindergarten, she thanks her children for doing their chores.And she said, “Why wouldn't I thank it, even though they're supposed to do it?”

So, the question is, why was I blocking it? Why were other people blocking it? Why can I say, “I'll take my steak medium rare, I need size six shoes,” but I won't say, “Would you praise me this way?” And it's because I'm giving you critical data about me.I'm telling you where I'm insecure.I'm telling you where I need your help.And I'm treating you, my inner circle, like you're the enemy.Because what can you do with that data? You could neglect me.You could abuse it.Or you could actually meet my need.And I took my bike into the bike store--I love this--same bike, and they'd do something called “truing” the wheels.The guy said, “You know, when you true the wheels, it's going to make the bike so much better.” I get the same bike back, and they've taken all the little warps out of those same wheels I've had for two and a half years, and my bike is like new.So, I'm going to challenge all of you.I want you to true your wheels: be honest about the praise that you need to hear.What do you need to hear? Go home to your wife--go ask her, what does she need? Go home to your husband--what does he need? Go home and ask those questions, and then help the people around you.And it's simple.And why should we care about this? We talk about world peace.How can we have world peace with different cultures, different languages? I think it starts household by household, under the same roof.So, let's make it right in our own backyard.And I want to thank all of you in the audience for being great husbands, great mothers, friends, daughters, sons.And maybe somebody's never said that to you, but you've done a really, really good job.And thank you for being here, just showing up and changing the world with your ideas.02.The benefits of a bilingual brain

¿Hablas español? Parlez-vous français? ni hui shuo zhong wen ma? If you answered “si”,”oui” or ”hui” and you are watching this in English, chances are you belong to the world bilingual and multilingual majority.And besides having an easier time traveling, or watching movies without subtitles, knowing two or more languages means that your brain may actually look and work differently than those of your monolingual friends.So what does it really mean to know a language?

Language ability is typically measured in two active parts, speaking and writing, and two passive parts, listening and reading.While a balanced bilingual has near equal abilities across the board in two languages, most bilinguals around the world know and use their languages in vary proportions.And depending on their situation and how they acquired each language, they can be classified into three general types.For example, let’s take Gabriella, whose family immigrates to the US from Peru when she was two-years old.As a compound bilingual, Gabriella develops two linguistic codes simultaneously, with a single set of concepts, learning both English and Spanish as she begins to process the world around her.Her teenage brother, on the other hand, might be a coordinate bilingual, working with two sets of concepts, learning English in school, while continuing to speak Spanish at home and with friends.Finally, Gabriella’s parents are likely to be subordinate bilinguals who learned a secondary language by filtering it through their primary language.Because all types of bilingual people can become fully proficient in a language regardless of accent and pronunciation, the difference may not be apparent to be a casual observer.But recent advances in imaging technology have given neurolinguists a glimpse into how specific aspects of language learning affect the bilingual brain.It’s well known that the brain’s left hemisphere is more dominant and analytical in logical processes, while the right hemisphere is more active in emotional and social ones, though this is a matter of degree, not an absolute split.The fact that language involves both types of functions while lateralization develops gradually with age, has lead to the critical period hypothesis.According to this theory, children learn languages more easily because the plasticity of their developing brains let them use both hemispheres in language acquisition, while in most adults, language is lateralized to one hemisphere, usually the left.If this is true, learning a language in childhood may give you a more holistic grasp of its social and emotional contexts.Conversely, recent research showed that people who learned a second language in adulthood exhibit less emotional bias and a more rational approach when confronting problems in the second language than their native one.But regardless of when you acquire additional languages, being multilingual gives your brain some remarkable advantages.Some of these are even visible, such higher density of the gray matter that contains most of your brain’s neurons and synapses, and more activity in certain regions when engaging a second language.The heightened workout a bilingual brain receives throughout its life can also help delay the onset of diseases, like Alzheimers and Dementia by as much as 5 years.The idea of major cognitive benefits to bilingualism may seem intuitive now, but it would have surprised earlier experts.Before the 1960s, bilingualism was considered a handicap that slowed the child’s development by forcing them to spend them too much energy distinguishing between languages, a view based largely on flawed studies.And while a more recent study did show that reaction times and errors increase for some bilingual students in cross-language tests, it also showed that the effort and attention needed to switch between languages triggered more activity in, and potentially strengthened, the dorsolateral prefrontal cortex.This is the part of brain that plays a large role in executive function, problem solving, switching between tasks, and focusing while filtering out irrelevant information.So, while bilingual may not necessarily make you smarter, it does make your brain more healthy, complex and actively engaged, and even if you didn’t have the good fortune of learning a second language like a child, it’s never too late to do yourself a favor and make the linguistic leap from, ”Hello,” to “Hola”, ”Bonjour” or “ninhao’s” because when it comes to our brains a little exercise can go a long way.03.Feats of memory anyone can do

I'd like to invite you to close your eyes.Imagine yourself standing outside the front door of your home.I'd like you to notice the color of the door, the material that it's made out of.Now visualize a pack of overweight nudists on bicycles.They are competing in a naked bicycle race, and they are headed straight for your front door.I need you to actually see this.They are pedaling really hard, they're sweaty, they're bouncing around a lot.And they crash straight into the front door of your home.Bicycles fly everywhere, wheels roll past you, spokes end up in awkward places.Step over the threshold of your door into your foyer, your hallway, whatever's on the other side, and appreciate the quality of the light.The light is shining down on Cookie Monster.Cookie Monster is waving at you from his perch on top of a tan horse.It's a talking horse.You can practically feel his blue fur tickling your nose.You can smell the oatmeal raisin cookie that he's about to shovel into his mouth.Walk past him.Walk past him into your living room.In your living room, in full imaginative broadband, picture Britney Spears.She is scantily clad, she's dancing on your coffee table, and she's singing “Hit Me Baby One More Time.” And then, follow me into your kitchen.In your kitchen, the floor has been paved over with a yellow brick road, and out of your oven are coming towards you Dorothy, the Tin Man, the Scarecrow and the Lion from “The Wizard of Oz,” hand-in-hand, skipping straight towards you.Okay.Open your eyes.I want to tell you about a very bizarre contest that is held every spring in New York City.It's called the United States Memory Championship.And I had gone to cover this contest a few years back as a science journalist, expecting, I guess, that this was going to be like the Superbowl of savants.This was a bunch of guys and a few ladies, widely varying in both age and hygienic upkeep.They were memorizing hundreds of random numbers, looking at them just once.They were memorizing the names of dozens and dozens and dozens of strangers.They were memorizing entire poems in just a few minutes.They were competing to see who could memorize the order of a shuffled pack of playing cards the fastest.I was like, this is unbelievable.These people must be freaks of nature.And I started talking to a few of the competitors.This is a guy called Ed Cook, who had come over from England, where he had one of the best-trained memories.And I said to him, “Ed, when did you realize that you were a savant?” And Ed was like, “I'm not a savant.In fact, I have just an average memory.Everybody who competes in this contest will tell you that they have just an average memory.We've all trained ourselves to perform these utterly miraculous feats of memory using a set of ancient techniques, techniques invented 2,500 years ago in Greece, the same techniques that Cicero had used to memorize his speeches, that medieval scholars had used to memorize entire books.” And I said, “Whoa.How come I never heard of this before?”

And we were standing outside the competition hall, and Ed, who is a wonderful, brilliant, but somewhat eccentric English guy, says to me, “Josh, you're an American journalist.Do you know Britney Spears?” I'm like, “What? No.Why?” “Because I really want to teach Britney Spears how to memorize the order of a shuffled pack of playing cards on U.S.national television.It will prove to the world that anybody can do this.”

I was like, “Well, I'm not Britney Spears, but maybe you could teach me.I mean, you've got to start somewhere, right?” And that was the beginning of a very strange journey for me.I ended up spending the better part of the next year not only training my memory, but also investigating it, trying to understand how it works, why it sometimes doesn't work, and what its potential might be.And I met a host of really interesting people.This is a guy called E.P.He's an amnesic who had, very possibly, the worst memory in the world.His memory was so bad, that he didn't even remember he had a memory problem, which is amazing.And he was this incredibly tragic figure, but he was a window into the extent to which our memories make us who we are.At the other end of the spectrum, I met this guy.This is Kim Peek, he was the basis for Dustin Hoffman's character in the movie “Rain Man.” We spent an afternoon together in the Salt Lake City Public Library memorizing phone books, which was scintillating.And I went back and I read a whole host of memory treatises, treatises written 2,000-plus years ago in Latin, in antiquity, and then later, in the Middle Ages.And I learned a whole bunch of really interesting stuff.One of the really interesting things that I learned is that once upon a time, this idea of having a trained, disciplined, cultivated memory was not nearly so alien as it would seem to us to be today.Once upon a time, people invested in their memories, in laboriously furnishing their minds.Over the last few millenia, we've invented a series of technologies--from the alphabet, to the scroll, to the codex, the printing press, photography, the computer, the smartphone--that have made it progressively easier and easier for us to externalize our memories, for us to essentially outsource this fundamental human capacity.These technologies have made our modern world possible, but they've also changed us.They've changed us culturally, and I would argue that they've changed us cognitively.Having little need to remember anymore, it sometimes seems like we've forgotten how.One of the last places on Earth where you still find people passionate about this idea of a trained, disciplined, cultivated memory, is at this totally singular memory contest.It's actually not that singular, there are contests held all over the world.And I was fascinated, I wanted to know how do these guys do it.A few years back a group of researchers at University College London brought a bunch of memory champions into the lab.They wanted to know: Do these guys have brains that are somehow structurally, anatomically different from the rest of ours? The answer was no.Are they smarter than the rest of us? They gave them a bunch of cognitive tests, and the answer was: not really.There was, however, one really interesting and telling difference between the brains of the memory champions and the control subjects that they were comparing them to.When they put these guys in an fMRI machine, scanned their brains while they were memorizing numbers and people's faces and pictures of snowflakes, they found that the memory champions were lighting up different parts of the brain than everyone else.Of note, they were using, or they seemed to be using, a part of the brain that's involved in spatial memory and navigation.Why? And is there something that the rest of us can learn from this?

The sport of competitive memorizing is driven by a kind of arms race where, every year, somebody comes up with a new way to remember more stuff more quickly, and then the rest of the field has to play catch-up.This is my friend Ben Pridmore, three-time world memory champion.On his desk in front of him are 36 shuffled packs of playing cards that he is about to try to memorize in one hour, using a technique that he invented and he alone has mastered.He used a similar technique to memorize the precise order of 4,140 random binary digits in half an hour.Yeah.And while there are a whole host of ways of remembering stuff in these competitions, everything, all of the techniques that are being used, ultimately come down to a concept that psychologists refer to as “elaborative encoding.”

And it's well-illustrated by a nifty paradox known as the Baker/baker paradox, which goes like this: If I tell two people to remember the same word, if I say to you, “Remember that there is a guy named Baker.” That's his name.And I say to you, “Remember that there is a guy who is a baker.” Okay? And I come back to you at some point later on, and I say, “Do you remember that word that I told you a while back? Do you remember what it was?” The person who was told his name is Baker is less likely to remember the same word than the person was told his job is a baker.Same word, different amount of remembering;that's weird.What's going on here?

Well, the name Baker doesn't actually mean anything to you.It is entirely untethered from all of the other memories floating around in your skull.But the common noun “baker”--we know bakers.Bakers wear funny white hats.Bakers have flour on their hands.Bakers smell good when they come home from work.Maybe we even know a baker.And when we first hear that word, we start putting these associational hooks into it, that make it easier to fish it back out at some later date.The entire art of what is going on in these memory contests, and the entire art of remembering stuff better in everyday life, is figuring out ways to transform capital B Bakers into lower-case B bakers--to take information that is lacking in context, in significance, in meaning, and transform it in some way, so that it becomes meaningful in the light of all the other things that you have in your mind.One of the more elaborate techniques for doing this dates back 2,500 years to Ancient Greece.It came to be known as the memory palace.The story behind its creation goes like this:

There was a poet called Simonides, who was attending a banquet.He was actually the hired entertainment, because back then, if you wanted to throw a really slamming party, you didn't hire a D.J., you hired a poet.And he stands up, delivers his poem from memory, walks out the door, and at the moment he does, the banquet hall collapses.Kills everybody inside.It doesn't just kill everybody, it mangles the bodies beyond all recognition.Nobody can say who was inside, nobody can say where they were sitting.The bodies can't be properly buried.It's one tragedy compounding another.Simonides, standing outside, the sole survivor amid the wreckage, closes his eyes and has this realization, which is that in his mind's eye, he can see where each of the guests at the banquet had been sitting.And he takes the relatives by the hand, and guides them each to their loved ones amid the wreckage.What Simonides figured out at that moment, is something that I think we all kind of intuitively know, which is that, as bad as we are at remembering names and phone numbers, and word-for-word instructions from our colleagues, we have really exceptional visual and spatial memories.If I asked you to recount the first 10 words of the story that I just told you about Simonides, chances are you would have a tough time with it.But, I would wager that if I asked you to recall who is sitting on top of a talking tan horse in your foyer right now, you would be able to see that.The idea behind the memory palace is to create this imagined edifice in your mind's eye, and populate it with images of the things that you want to remember--the crazier, weirder, more bizarre, funnier, raunchier, stinkier the image is, the more unforgettable it's likely to be.This is advice that goes back 2,000-plus years to the earliest Latin memory treatises.So how does this work? Let's say that you've been invited to TED center stage to give a speech, and you want to do it from memory, and you want to do it the way that Cicero would have done it, if he had been invited to TEDxRome 2,000 years ago.What you might do is picture yourself at the front door of your house.And you'd come up with some sort of crazy, ridiculous, unforgettable image, to remind you that the first thing you want to talk about is this totally bizarre contest.And then you'd go inside your house, and you would see an image of Cookie Monster on top of Mister Ed.And that would remind you that you would want to then introduce your friend Ed Cook.And then you'd see an image of Britney Spears to remind you of this funny anecdote you want to tell.And you'd go into your kitchen, and the fourth topic you were going to talk about was this strange journey that you went on for a year, and you'd have some friends to help you remember that.This is how Roman orators memorized their speeches--not word-for-word, which is just going to screw you up, but topic-for-topic.In fact, the phrase “topic sentence”--that comes from the Greek word “topos,” which means “place.” That's a vestige of when people used to think about oratory and rhetoric in these sorts of spatial terms.The phrase “in the first place,” that's like “in the first place of your memory palace.”

I thought this was just fascinating, and I got really into it.And I went to a few more of these memory contests, and I had this notion that I might write something longer about this subculture of competitive memorizers.But there was a problem.The problem was that a memory contest is a pathologically boring event.Truly, it is like a bunch of people sitting around taking the SATs--I mean, the most dramatic it gets is when somebody starts massaging their temples.And I'm a journalist, I need something to write about.I know that there's incredible stuff happening in these people's minds, but I don't have access to it.And I realized, if I was going to tell this story, I needed to walk in their shoes a little bit.And so I started trying to spend 15 or 20 minutes every morning, before I sat down with my New York Times, just trying to remember something.Maybe it was a poem, maybe it was names from an old yearbook that I bought at a flea market.And I found that this was shockingly fun.I never would have expected that.It was fun because this is actually not about training your memory.What you're doing, is you're trying to get better and better at creating, at dreaming up, these utterly ludicrous, raunchy, hilarious, and hopefully unforgettable images in your mind's eye.And I got pretty into it.This is me wearing my standard competitive memorizer's training kit.It's a pair of earmuffs and a set of safety goggles that have been masked over except for two small pinholes, because distraction is the competitive memorizer's greatest enemy.I ended up coming back to that same contest that I had covered a year earlier, and I had this notion that I might enter it, sort of as an experiment in participatory journalism.It'd make, I thought, maybe a nice epilogue to all my research.Problem was, the experiment went haywire.I won the contest--which really wasn't supposed to happen.Now, it is nice to be able to memorize speeches and phone numbers and shopping lists, but it's actually kind of beside the point.These are just tricks.They work because they're based on some pretty basic principles about how our brains work.And you don't have to be building memory palaces or memorizing packs of playing cards to benefit from a little bit of insight about how your mind works.We often talk about people with great memories as though it were some sort of an innate gift, but that is not the case.Great memories are learned.At the most basic level, we remember when we pay attention.We remember when we are deeply engaged.We remember when we are able to take a piece of information and experience, and figure out why it is meaningful to us, why it is significant, why it's colorful, when we're able to transform it in some way that makes sense in the light of all of the other things floating around in our minds, when we're able to transform Bakers into bakers.The memory palace, these memory techniques--they're just shortcuts.In fact, they're not even really shortcuts.They work because they make you work.They force a kind of depth of processing, a kind of mindfulness, that most of us don't normally walk around exercising.But there actually are no shortcuts.This is how stuff is made memorable.And I think if there's one thing that I want to leave you with, it's what E.P., the amnesic who couldn't even remember he had a memory problem, left me with, which is the notion that our lives are the sum of our memories.How much are we willing to lose from our already short lives, by losing ourselves in our Blackberries, our iPhones, by not paying attention to the human being across from us who is talking with us, by being so lazy that we're not willing to process deeply?

I learned firsthand that there are incredible memory capacities latent in all of us.But if you want to live a memorable life, you have to be the kind of person who remembers to remember.Thank you.01.请别忘记感谢身边的人

嗨。我在这里要和大家谈谈向别人表达赞美，倾佩和谢意的重要性。并使它们听来真诚，具体。

之所以我对此感兴趣是因为我从我自己的成长中注意到几年前，当我想要对某个人说声谢谢时，当我想要赞美他们时，当我想接受他们对我的赞扬，但我却没有说出口。我问我自己，这是为什么？我感到害羞，我感到尴尬。接着我产生了一个问题难道我是唯一一个这么做的人吗？所以我决定做些探究。

我非常幸运的在一家康复中心工作，所以我可以看到那些因为上瘾而面临生与死的人。有时候这一切可以非常简单地归结为，他们最核心的创伤来自于他们父亲到死都未说过“他为他们而自豪”。但他们从所有其它家庭或朋友那里得知他的父亲告诉其他人为他感到自豪，但这个父亲从没告诉过他儿子。因为他不知道他的儿子需要听到这一切。

因此我的问题是，为什么我们不索求我们需要的东西呢？我认识一个结婚25年的男士渴望听到他妻子说，“感谢你为这个家在外赚钱，这样我才能在家陪伴着孩子，”但他从来不去问。我认识一个精于此道的女士。每周一次，她见到丈夫后会说，“我真的希望你为我对这个家和孩子们付出的努力而感谢我。”他会应和到“哦，真是太棒了，真是太棒了。”赞扬别人一定要真诚，但她对赞美承担了责任。一个从我上幼儿园就一直是朋友的叫April的人，她会感谢她的孩子们做了家务。她说：“为什么我不表示感谢呢，即使他们本来就要做那些事情？”

因此我的问题是，为什么我不说呢？为什么其它人不说呢？为什么我能说：“我要一块中等厚度的牛排，我需要6号尺寸的鞋子，”但我却不能说：“你可以赞扬我吗？”因为这会使我把我的重要信息与你分享。会让我告诉了你我内心的不安。会让你认为我需要你的帮助。虽然你是我最贴心的人，我却把你当作是敌人。你会用我托付给你的重要信息做些什么呢？你可以忽视我。你可以滥用它。或者你可以满足我的要求。

我把我的自行车拿到车行－－我喜欢这么做－－同样的自行车，他们会对车轮做整形。那里的人说：“当你对车轮做整形时，它会使自行车变成更好。”我把这辆自行车拿回来，他们把有小小弯曲的铁丝从轮子上拿走这辆车我用了2年半，现在还像新的一样。所以我要问在场的所有人，我希望你们把你们的车轮整形一下：真诚面对对你们想听到的赞美。你们想听到什么呢？回家问问你们的妻子，她想听到什么？回家问问你们的丈夫，他想听到什么？回家问问这些问题，并帮助身边的人实现它们。

非常简单。为什么要关心这个呢？我们谈论世界和平。我们怎么用不同的文化，不同的语言来保持世界和平？我想要从每个小家庭开始。所以让我们在家里就把这件事情做好。我想要感谢所有在这里的人们因为你们是好丈夫，好母亲，好伙伴，好女儿和好儿子。或许有些人从没跟你们说过但你们已经做得非常非常得出色了。感谢你们来到这里，向世界显示着你们的智慧，并用它们改变着世界。

02.双语能力对大脑的益处惊人

你会说中文吗？如果你能回答“si”、“oui”或者“是的”，而且能看懂这个英文短片，那么你就跟世界上很多人一样、具备双语能力或是多语能力。除了旅游时沟通比较方便、看电影不需要字幕这些好处之外，通晓两种或者三种以上的语言，意味着你的大脑在结构上或运作上与你那些单一语言的朋友有着明显的不同。所以到底什么才能算通晓一门语言呢？

衡量语言能力，主要包含两个主动部分——说和写，和两个被动部分——听和读。虽然一个出色的双语者对于两种语言都有着相近的使用能力，但是大多数的双语者对两个语种的认知和使用能力是有差异的。根据个人所处的环境以及他们具体学语言的方法，双语者通常可以分成三类。

举个例子来说，Gabriella在两岁时跟着家人由秘鲁移民到美国。她属于复合型双语者，Gabriella在刚接触这个世界时就同时学英语和西班牙语，所以给她一个概念、她的大脑就能同时唤起两种语言信号。她有一个十几岁的哥哥，则属于协调型双语使用者，他运用两种不同的概念，一方面在学校学习英语，另一方面用西班牙语和家人、朋友交流。

最后，Gabriella的父母，则属于从属型双语者。当他们学习外语（英语）时，需要通过母语进行翻译再进行学习。

如果不考虑口音和发音问题，这三种类型的双语者至少都算能精通一门语言。因此，一般人很难发现这三种类型的差异。然而现在，由于大脑成像技术不断进步，神经语言学家能够知道语言学习对双语使用者的大脑产生什么样的影响。

大家都知道，大脑的左半球是掌管数据和逻辑分析的，而大脑的右半球则掌管情感与社交，但这并不是绝对的、只是比例多少的问题。

语言同时包括了左脑和右脑的功能，而随着年龄的增长，大脑的功能会逐渐侧重其中的一边，语言学习的关键时期假说就是由这个事实引申出来的。根据这个理论，儿童学习语言更容易，是因为他们的大脑仍在发展、可塑性更强，他们可以同时调用左右两边大脑的机能来学习语言；然而多数成年人只通过大脑的一边（通常是左脑）学习语言。

如果这个假说是真的，那么在儿童时期学习语言可以让你对其社会和情感内涵有着更整体的把握。另一方面，近期的研究表明，成年人学习外语时的情绪性偏见没那么多，同时相比于母语环境，他们在外语环境中遇到问题时也更为理性。

无论如何，当你学习一门新的语言时，多语能力都会给你的大脑带来明显的好处。有些好处甚至是可视化的，比如大脑灰白质的密度增加，那里包含了大多数的神经元和突触，而且在学习外语时，大脑的部分区域会变得更加活跃。双语者的大脑可以持续不断地接收强化训练，这能让一些病症（如阿兹海默痴呆症和失智症）的发作推迟至5年以后。

双语能力对认知能力的有所帮助在现代来看是很好理解的，但是过去的专家一定会对这个观点大吃一惊。在1960年之前，人们认为使用双语对于儿童的成长来说是一种障碍，因为这需要儿童花费精力去分辨别不同语言，这种观点的产生源自有瑕疵的研究方法。

最新的研究的确显示，在跨语言测验当中，使用双语的学生的反应时间与错误次数增加了；同时也表明，学生需要花费更多的努力和注意力进行语言的转换，这也使得前额叶脑区更加活跃、进而强化其机能。前额叶脑区主要影响执行、解决问题、多任务转换、集中注意力、排除无关信息的能力。

虽然学习双语不一定能让你更聪明，但是它可以让你的大脑更加健康、多元和活跃。即使你在年幼时没有机会学习第二语言，但是现在学习永远不会太晚。从现在开始学一门外语吧，把“hello”转换成“Hola”、“Bonjour”、“你好”(本文作者母语为英语)等外语问候，即使只是小小的训练，也能对大脑有所帮助。03.每个人都能掌握的记忆技巧

请大家跟我一起闭上眼睛，象一下。

你站在，自己家门口的外面，请留心一下门的颜色，以及门的材质，现在请想象一群超重的裸骑者，正在进行一场裸体自行车赛，向你的前门直冲而来，尽量让画面想象得栩栩如生近在眼前，他们都在奋力地踩脚踏板汗流浃背，路面非常颠簸，然后径直撞进了你家前门，自行车四下飞散车轮从你身旁滚过，辐条扎进了各种尴尬角落，跨过门槛，进到门厅、走廊和门里的其他地方，室内光线柔和舒适，光线洒在甜饼怪物身上，他坐在一匹棕色骏马的马背上，正向你招手，这匹马会说话，你可以感觉到他的蓝色鬃毛让你鼻子发痒，你可以闻到他正要扔进嘴里的葡萄燕麦曲奇的香气，绕过他绕过他走进客厅，站在客厅里把你的想象力调到最大档，想象小甜甜布兰妮，她衣着暴露在你咖啡桌上跳舞，并唱着“Hit Me Baby One More Time”，接下来跟着我走进你的厨房，厨房的地面被一道黄砖路覆盖，依次钻出你的烤箱向你走来的是，《绿野仙踪》里的多萝西铁皮人，稻草人和狮子，他们手挽着手蹦蹦跳跳地向你走来，好了睁开眼睛吧，我要给你们讲一个每年春天在纽约，都会举办的奇异竞赛，叫做全美记忆冠军赛，几年前我作为一名科技类记者，去报道这项竞赛，心里想着大概那儿得像，怪才的“超级碗冠军赛”一样热闹吧，一大堆男人和屈指可数的女性，从小孩儿到老人有些还不怎么注意个人卫生，有的奋力在只看一次的情况下，记下上百个任意列出的数字，有的在努力记住成群的陌生人的名字，有的想在几分钟内努力背下整篇诗歌，还有的在比赛谁能以最快速度，记下一整副打乱的牌的顺序，我当时觉得这太不可思议了，这些人肯定天赋异禀。

所以我开始采访参赛者，这位叫Ed Cook，是从英格兰来的，他在那儿接受了最好的记忆训练，我问他 “Ed 你是什么时候开始意识到，自己是记忆天才的?”，Ed答道“我并不是什么专家，其实我的记忆力很一般，来参赛的每一个人，都会告诉你他们的记忆力只是一般水平，我们都在训练自己后才能，完成这些奇迹般的记忆游戏，我们运用了一系列古老的技巧，这些技巧是希腊人在两千五百年前发明的，西塞罗正是用了这些技巧，来记忆他的演讲稿的，中世纪学者用这种技巧来背诵正本书籍的内容“，我惊讶不已 ”哇噻怎么我从来没听说过呢?“，我们站在竞技大厅外，聪明过人令人惊叹，而又稍有些古怪的英国人Ed，对我说 ”Josh 你是个美国记者，你知道小甜甜布兰妮吧?”，我茫然不解 “什么? 当然为什么要问这个?”，“因为我真的很想在，美国国家电台上教会布兰妮，怎样记住一整副打乱的牌的顺序，就能证明这是人人都可以做到的了“，我说 ”虽然我不是布兰妮，但你也可以教教我呀，总得找个人开教嘛不是吗?“，接着一段非常奇特的历程在我面前展开了序幕，结果第二年的大部分时间，我都花在了训练自己的记忆力，同时调查研究记忆上，我想尝试理解产生记忆的原理，为何有时会记了又忘，及其它到底隐藏着什么样的潜力，途中我遇到了很多有趣的人，其中一个叫E.P.，他患有健忘症他的记忆力，恐怕是世界上最差的了，他的记忆能力差到，甚至记不得自己有健忘症，真的很神奇，虽然他是个悲剧角色，但通过他我们能了解到，记忆在何种程度上塑造了我们的人格，情况的另一个极端是我遇到了这样一个人，他叫Kim Peek，他是Dustin Hoffman在电影《雨人》里的角色的原型，我和他花了一下午，在盐湖城公共图书馆里背电话簿，让我大开眼界，回家后我读了许多关于记忆的论文，写于两千多年前的论文，用拉丁文写的从古代，一直到后来中世纪期间，我学到很多很有意思的事儿，其中一个就是，曾经，训练规束培养记忆力的这种概念，完全不像如今那样陌生，曾几何时人们寄希望于自己的记忆，能不遗余力地装饰自己的心灵，近几千年来，人类发明了一系列技术，从字母表到卷轴，到法典印刷机摄影技术，电脑智能手机，让我们能越来越轻松地，外化记忆能力，让我们从根本上，把这种基础的人类能力拱手让出，这些技术让现代生活变为可能，但同时也改变了我们，不仅在文化上，我觉得也在认知上，不再需要费劲去记忆，有时会觉得我们已经忘了如何去记忆，在这片地球上已经很少有地方，能让你觉得人们仍热衷于，训练规束培养记忆力了，那非同寻常的记忆大赛算是一个，其实它也没有那么非同寻常，世界各地都开始举办这样的竞赛，我对此深深着迷想要知道这些人是怎么做到的，几年前伦敦大学学院的一组研究人员，请来一批记忆大赛的冠军接受研究，他们想要弄明白，这些人的大脑，是否跟我们其他人在解剖学上的结构不一样?，答案是否定的，那他们比我们都聪明吗?，他们给研究对象实施了一系列认知测试，依旧得出了否定结论，但对比受控制的比对目标的大脑，记忆大赛冠军们的大脑，确实有一处很有趣的不同很说明问题，这些人被送去做功能磁共振，扫描大脑时，当他们在记忆数字或人脸或雪花图案时，研究人员发现记忆大赛冠军们，的大脑激活的区域，跟普通人不太一样，值得注意的是他们看来是在用，脑中在空间记忆和导航时会用到的部分，为什么? 我们可以从中得出什么样的结论呢?，竞争性记忆的较量，被一种类似军事比赛的方式推向了白热化，每年都会有人，带着更有效的记忆方法现身赛场，而其他人就必须迎头赶上，这是我的朋友Ben Pridmore，赢得过三次国际记忆大赛冠军，在他的台前，有三十六副打乱顺序的牌，他要在一个小时内记下全部，用的是一种他自己发明的也只有他会的技巧，用与此类似的方法，他曾一字不差地背下了，4140个任意排列的二进制数，只用了半个小时，很牛吧，参赛者在这些竞赛中，运用过很多不同的记忆方法，各式各样被运用到的所有技巧，最终都能归化为一个概念，心理学家称之为”精细编码“，这个概念能用一则幽默的悖论完美诠释，叫做Baker/baker悖论，简单说来就是，假设我让两个人去记同一个词，我跟你说，”记住有个人叫Baker“，Baker是人名，我又来告诉你 ”记住有个人是面包师(baker)“，过了一段时间我又回来找到你们，问 ”还记得我之前，叫你们记住的那个词吗?“，”还记得是什么词吗?“，被告知人名是Baker的人，记住这个词的可能性远不如，被告知职业是面包师的那个人，同样的词导致不同的记忆程度，到底是为什么呢，是因为人名Baker没有任何特殊含义，没法跟你脑海里，零碎繁杂的记忆产生任何联系，但是面包师(baker)作为一个常用名词，我们都知道面包师是什么，面包师带着搞笑的白帽子，他们手上沾满了面粉，他们下班回到家带着扑鼻的烤面包香，甚至可能有些人有朋友就是面包师，我们初次听到这个词时，马上就会产生各种各样的联想，这使我们能在一段时间后还能回忆起来，其实要理解记忆竞赛中的，一切奥妙，或在日常生活中改善记忆力的秘诀，仅仅在于想办法把Baker中的大写B，变为面包师(baker)中的小写b，把没有前因后果，没有重要性没有涵义的信息，用某种方法转化为，有意义的内容，跟脑海里的其他记忆串联起来，这种精确记忆的技巧，在两千五百年前的古希腊就已出现，后来将其称为记忆宫殿，发明这种技巧的过程如下，有个叫做Simonides的诗人，他要去参加一个晚宴，其实他算是被请去做表演嘉宾的，因为在那个年代炫酷派对的标准，不是请D.J.来打碟而是要请诗人来颂诗，他站起来背出了他的全篇诗作然后潇洒离去，他刚走出门口晚宴大厅就塌了，砸死了里面所有的人，不仅全体死亡，所有的死者都被砸得面目全非，没人说得清死者都有些谁，没人说得清谁坐在哪儿，导致死者的尸体没法得到合适的殉葬安置，这又加重了整件事的悲剧色彩，Simonides站在外面，作为废墟中的唯一幸存者，闭上眼睛猛然意识到，在他的脑海中，他眼前出现了所有宾客所坐的位置，他就牵着亲属们的手，穿过废墟把他们带到了亲人身边，Simonides当时猛然醒悟的事，大概我们大家也都猜到了，其实是不管我们，有多不善于记住姓名电话号码，或是同事的每句指令，我们都拥有异常敏锐的视觉或空间记忆能力，要是我让你们逐字逐句地重述，我刚才讲的Simonides故事的前十个字，应该没几个人会记得，但我敢打赌，如果我让你们现在回想下，在你的门厅里坐在会讲话的棕色骏马上的，是谁，你们就明白我刚才说的意思了，记忆宫殿的原理，就是在你的脑海里建立一栋想象大厦，并让你想记住的东西，的影像充满其中，越是疯狂古怪奇诡，荒诞搞笑乱七八糟招人厌恶的影像，就越容易记住，这个建议来自于两千多年前，拉丁最早的记忆学者，那么这种说法的原理到底是什么呢，假设你被邀请，站上TED的中心讲台演讲，而你想脱稿完成，如西塞罗在两千年前在TEDx罗马上的演讲一般，他就会这么霸气走一回而你也想这样，你要做的就是，想象自己站在自家门前，然后凭空想象出，一段完全荒诞疯狂难忘的景象，用来提示你上台要提的第一件事，就是这场诡异的裸骑大赛，然后你走进房子里，想到甜饼怪物，坐在Ed先生背上的样子，这个景象会提醒你，要介绍你的朋友Ed Cook，然后你脑海里出现了小甜甜布兰妮的样子，你就会想起要讲那个关于布兰妮的小故事，然后你走进厨房，你要说到的第四个话题是，你花了一整年走过的奇妙历程，通过绿野仙踪就可以联想得到，这就是罗马演说家背诵演讲稿的秘诀，并非一字不差逐字背诵只会平添麻烦，而是记住一个个主题，其实短语”主题句“，就来源于希腊词”topos“，意思是”地点“，这是古时候，人们谈到演讲或是修辞时，会用到的空间术语，短语 ”第一"，就意味着你的记忆宫殿的第一层，这简直太有意思了，我对这起了很大的兴趣，后来我又去了更多记忆大赛，我开始萌发了要更详细描写，这种竞技记忆文化的念头，但有一个问题，问题是记忆大赛，其实过程很无聊的，(大笑)，真的就像一群人坐那儿高考一样，最最激动人心的时刻，也不过就是有人揉了揉太阳穴，我是个记者总得有东西可写呀，我知道这些人脑子里肯定是惊涛骇浪，但我作为外人无法得见，我意识到若我真的想报道这事儿，一定得亲身体验才行，所以我开始尝试着每天早上坐下来看纽约时报前，花上十五到二十分钟，尝试记忆一些事，背背小诗，背背我在跳蚤市场买来的，旧年鉴里的人名，我惊奇地发现这其实非常带劲，要不去尝试根本想不到，有趣在于其实目标并不是要通过训练提高记忆力，而是你在努力培养改善，创造力想象力，在你的脑海里凭空造出，那些完全滑稽荒诞胡乱最好是难忘的影像，而它成为了我的乐趣，这是我戴着标准竞赛记忆者训练套装的样子，它有一对耳塞，一副护目镜镜面全部遮黑，就留了两个小孔，因为竞技记忆者最大的敌人就是注意力分散，最后我再次回到了一年前报道的那场竞赛场上，我一时冲动也想报名参加，就当做参与性新闻报道的实验了，我当时想到时能在前言里调侃一下自己也好，问题是实验最后得到了意想不到的结果，那场竞赛我赢了，真是完全出乎我预料之外，对我来说现在，背演讲稿电话号码或是购物单，都是小菜一碟倒是很不错，但其实这些都不重要了，这些都是小伎俩，这些记忆伎俩之所以有效，是因为它们依仗人类大脑运转的，一些基本原理，并不用真的去建立记忆宫殿，或记下几副牌的顺序，你也完全可以从了解大脑运转原理中，获得一些益处，我们总会议论记忆力很好的人，总觉得那些人是天赋异禀，事实并不是这样，强大的记忆力是可以习得的，从最根本的说起专心致志就能记住，全心投入时就能记住，只要能想办法把信息和经历，转化为有意义的事，就能记住，想它为何重要为何多彩，当我们能把它转化成为，有前因后果的事，并跟我们脑海中繁杂琐碎的其他事产生联想时，当我们能把人名Baker转化为面包师baker时，记忆宫殿或是那些记忆技巧，都只是捷径而已，其实说到底它们都不能算捷径，这方法有效是因为它迫使你思考，它迫使你往更深层次去想，让你更加专注，大部分人平时并不会费力去训练这个，其实捷径并不存在，这一直就是我们能记住事物的原因，有一件事我希望你们能记住，就是E.P.，那个连自己患了健忘症都想不起来的人，让我深思，得出了一个感想，人生就是我们个人记忆的合集，在短暂的人生里，你还愿意因为黑莓 iPhone，丧失多少瞬间，忽略对面坐着的人，在跟我们交谈的人，变得越发懒惰不愿意，深究任何事？，通过亲身经历我发现，我们的身体里潜藏着，不可思议的记忆能力，但若你想活得难忘，就得做那种，记得时常记忆的人。

谢谢。

第三篇：TED英语演讲稿

我知道你们在想什么，你们觉得我迷路了，马上就会有人走上台温和地把我带回我的座位上。（掌声）。我在迪拜总会遇上这种事。“来这里度假的吗，亲爱的？”（笑声）“来探望孩子的吗？这次要待多久呢？ 恩，事实上，我希望能再待久一点。我在波斯湾这边生活和教书已经超过30年了。（掌声）这段时间里，我看到了很多变化。现在这份数据是挺吓人的，而我今天要和你们说的是有关语言的消失和英语的全球化。我想和你们谈谈我的朋友，她在阿布达比教成人英语。在一个晴朗的日子里，她决定带她的学生到花园去教他们一些大自然的词汇。但最后却变成是她在学习所有当地植物在阿拉伯语中是怎么说的。还有这些植物是如何被用作药材，化妆品，烹饪，香草。这些学生是怎么得到这些知识的呢？当然是从他们的祖父母，甚至曾祖父母那里得来的。不需要我来告诉你们能够跨代沟通是多么重要。but sadly, today, languages are dying at an unprecedented rate.a language dies every 14 days.now, at the same time, english is the undisputed global language.could there be a connection? well i dont know.but i do know that ive seen a lot of changes.when i first came out to the gulf, i came to kuwait in the days when it was still a hardship post.actually, not that long ago.that is a little bit too early.but nevertheless, i was recruited by the british council along with about 25 other teachers.and we were the first non-muslims to teach in the state schools there in kuwait.we were brought to teach english because the government wanted to modernize the country and empower the citizens through education.and of course, the u.k.benefited from some of that lovely oil wealth.但遗憾的是，今天很多语言正在以前所未有的速度消失。每14天就有一种语言消失，而与此同时，英语却无庸置疑地成为全球性的语言。这其中有关联吗？我不知道。但我知道的是，我见证过许多改变。初次来到海湾地区时，我去了科威特。当时教英文仍然是个困难的工作。其实，没有那么久啦，这有点太久以前了。总之，我和其他25位老师一起被英国文化协会聘用。我们是第一批非穆斯林的老师，在科威特的国立学校任教。我们被派到那里教英语，是因为当地政府希望国家可以现代化并透过教育提升公民的水平。当然，英国也能得到些好处，产油国可是很有钱的。okay.now this is the major change that ive seen--how teaching english has morphed from being a mutually english-speaking nation on earth.and why not? after all, the best education--according to the latest world university rankings--is to be found in the universities of the u.k.and the u.s.so everybody wants to have an english education, naturally.but if youre not a native speaker, you have to pass a test.言归正传，我见过最大的改变，就是英语教学的蜕变如何从一个互惠互利的行为变成今天这种大规模的国际产业。英语不再是学校课程里的外语学科，也不再只是英国的专利。英语（教学）已经成为所有英语系国家追逐的潮流。何乐而不为呢？毕竟，最好的教育来自于最好的大学，而根据最新的世界大学排名，那些名列前茅的都是英国和美国的大学。所以自然每个人都想接受英语教育，但如果你不是以英文为母语，你就要通过考试。now can it be right to reject a student on linguistic ability well, i dont think so.we english teachers reject them all the time.we put a stop sign, and we stop them in their tracks.they cant pursue their dream any longer, till they get english.now let me put it this way, if i met a dutch speaker who had the cure for cancer, would i stop him from entering my british university? i dont think so.but indeed, that is exactly what we do.we english teachers are the gatekeepers.and you have to satisfy us first that your english is good enough.now it can be dangerous to give too much power to a narrow segment of society.maybe the barrier would be too universal.但仅凭语言能力就拒绝学生这样对吗？譬如如果你碰到一位天才计算机科学家，但他会需要有和律师一样的语言能力吗？我不这么认为。但身为英语老师的我们，却总是拒绝他们。我们处处设限，将学生挡在路上，使他们无法再追求自己的梦想，直到他们通过考试。现在容我换一个方式说，如果我遇到了一位只会说荷兰话的人，而这个人能治愈癌症，我会阻止他进入我的英国大学吗？我想不会。但事实上，我们的确在做这种事。我们这些英语老师就是把关的。你必须先让我们满意，使我们认定你的英文够好。但这可能是危险的。把太多的权力交由这么小的一群人把持，也许会令这种障碍太过普及。okay.but, i hear you say, what about the research? its all in english.so the books are in english, the journals are done in english, but that is a self-fulfilling.it feeds the english requirement.and so it goes on.i ask you, what happened to translation? if you think about the islamic golden age, there was lots of translation then.they translated from latin and greek into arabic, into persian, and then it was translated on into the germanic languages of europe and the romance languages.and so light shone upon the dark ages of europe.now dont get me wrong;i am not against teaching english, all you english teachers out there.i love it that we have a global language.we need one today more than ever.but i am against using it as a barrier.do we really want to end up with 600 languages and the main one being english, or chinese? we need more than that.where do we draw the line? this system equates intelligence with a knowledge of english which is quite.于是，我听到你们问但是研究呢?研究报告都要用英文。”的确，研究论著和期刊都要用英文发表，但这只是一种理所当然的现象。有英语要求，自然就有英语供给，然后就这么循环下去。我倒想问问大家，为什么不用翻译呢？想想伊斯兰的黄金时代，当时翻译盛行，人们把拉丁文和希腊文翻译成阿拉伯文或波斯文，然后再由拉伯文或波斯文翻译为欧洲的日耳曼语言以及罗曼语言。于是文明照亮了欧洲的黑暗时代。但不要误会我的意思，我不是反对英语教学或是在座所有的英语老师。我很高兴我们有一个全球性的语言，这在今日尤为重要。但我反对用英语设立障碍。难道我们真希望世界上只剩下600种语言，其中又以英文或中文为主流吗？我们需要的不只如此。那么我们该如何拿捏呢？这个体制把智能和英语能力画上等号这是相当武断的。

and i want to remind you that the giants upon whose shoulders todays stand did not have to have english, they didnt have to pass an english test.case in point, einstein.he, by the way, was considered remedial at school because he was, in fact, dyslexic.but fortunately for the world, he did not have to pass an english test.because they didnt start until 1964 with toefl, the american test of english.now its exploded.there are lots and lots of tests of english.and millions and millions of students take these tests every year.now you might think, you and me, those fees arent bad, theyre okay, but they are prohibitive to so many millions of poor people.so immediately, were rejecting them.我想要提醒你们，扶持当代知识分子的这些“巨人肩膀不必非得具有英文能力，他们不需要通过英语考试。爱因斯坦就是典型的例子。顺便说一下，他在学校还曾被认为需要课外补习，因为他其实有阅读障碍。但对整个世界来说,很幸运的当时他不需要通过英语考试，因为他们直到1964年才开始使用托福。现在英语测验太泛滥了，有太多太多的英语测验，以及成千上万的学生每年都在参加这些考试。现在你会认为，你和我都这么想，这些费用不贵，价钱满合理的。但是对数百万的穷人来说，这些费用高不可攀。所以，当下我们又拒绝了他们。it brings to mind a headline i saw recently: education: the great divide.now i get it, i understand why people would focus on english.they want to give their children the best chance in life.and to do that, they need a western education.because, of course, the best jobs go to people out of the western universities, that i put on earlier.its a circular thing.这使我想起最近看到的一个新闻标题：“教育：大鸿沟”现在我懂了。我了解为什么大家都重视英语，因为他们希望给孩子最好的人生机会。为了达成这目的，他们需要西方教育。毕竟，不可否认，最好的工作都留给那些西方大学毕业出来的人。就像我之前说的，这是一种循环。

okay.let me tell you a story about two scientists, two english scientists.they were doing an experiment to do with genetics and the forelimbs and the hind limbs of animals.but they couldnt get the results they wanted.they really didnt know what to do, until along came a german scientist who realized that they were using two words for forelimb and hind limb, whereas genetics does not differentiate and neither does german.so bingo, problem solved.if you cant think a thought, you are stuck.but if another language can think that thought, then, by cooperating, we can achieve and learn so much more.好，我跟你们说一个关于两位科学家的故事：有两位英国科学家在做一项实验，是关于遗传学的，以及动物的前、后肢。但他们无法得到他们想要的结果。他们真的不知道该怎么办，直到来了一位德国的科学家。他发现在英文里前肢和后肢是不同的二个字，但在遗传学上没有区别。在德语也是同一个字。所以，叮！问题解决了。如果你不能想到一个念头，你会卡在那里。但如果另一个语言能想到那念头，然后通过合作我们可以达成目的，也学到更多。我的女儿从科威特来到英格兰，她在阿拉伯的学校学习科学和数学。那是所阿拉伯中学。在学校里，她得把这些知识翻译成英文，而她在班上却能在这些学科上拿到最好的成绩。这告诉我们，当外籍学生来找我们，我们可能无法针对他们所知道的给予赞赏，因为那是来自于他们母语的知识。当一个语言消失时，我们不知道还有什么也会一并失去。this is--i dont know if you saw it on cnn recently--they gave the heroes award to a young kenyan shepherd boy who couldnt study at night in his village like all the village children,篇二：杨澜ted演讲稿中英文 yang lan: the generation thats remaking china the night before i was heading for scotland, i was invited to host the final of chinas got talent show in shanghai with the 80,000 live audience in the stadium.guess who was the performing guest?susan boyle.and i told her, im going to scotland the next day.she sang beautifully, and she even managed to say a few words in chinese.[chinese]so its not like hello or thank you, that ordinary stuff.it means green onion for free.why did she say that? because it was a line from our chinese parallel susan boyle--a 50-some year-old woman, a vegetable vendor in shanghai, who loves singing western opera, but she didnt understand any english or french or italian, so she managed to fill in the lyrics with vegetable names in chinese.(laughter)and the last sentence of nessun dorma that she was singing in the stadium was green onion for free.so [as] susan boyle was saying that, 80,000 live audience sang together.that was hilarious.so i guess both susan boyle and this vegetable vendor in shanghai belonged to otherness.they were the least expected to be successful in the business called entertainment, yet their courage and talent brought them through.and a show and a platform gave them the stage to realize their dreams.well, being different is not that difficult.we are all different from different perspectives.but i think being different is good, because you present a different point of view.you may have the chance to make a difference.my generation has been very fortunate to witness and participate in the historic transformation of china that has made so many changes in the past 20, 30 years.i remember that in the year of 1990,when i was graduating from college, i was applying for a job in the sales department of the first five-star hotel in beijing, great wall sheraton--its still there.so after being interrogated by this japanese manager for a half an hour, he finally said, so, miss yang, do you have any questions to ask me?i summoned my courage and poise and said,yes, but could you let me know, what actually do you sell? i didnt have a clue what a sales department was about in a five-star hotel.that was the first day i set my foot in a five-star hotel.my life, and i feel proud of that.but then we are also so fortunate to witness the transformation of the whole country.i was in beijings bidding for the olympic games.i was representing the shanghai expo.i saw china embracing the world and vice versa.but then sometimes im thinking, what are todays young generation up to? how are they different, and what are the differences they are going to make to shape the future of china, or at large, the world? so making a living is not that easy for young people.college graduates are not in short supply.in urban areas, college graduates find the starting salary is about 400 u.s.dollars a month, while the average rent is above $500.so what do they do? they have to share space--squeezed in very limited space to save money--and they call themselves tribe of ants.and for those who are ready to get married and buy their apartment, they figured out they have to work for 30 to 40 years to afford their first apartment.that ratio in americawould only cost a couple five years to earn, but in china its 30 to 40 years with the skyrocketing real estate price.so through some of the hottest topics on microblogging, we can see what young people care most about.social justice and government accountability runs the first in what they demand.for the past decade or so, a massive urbanization and development have let us witness a lot of reports on the forced demolition of private property.and it has aroused huge anger and frustrationamong our young generation.sometimes people get killed, and sometimes people set themselves on fire to protest.so when these incidents are reported more and more frequently on the internet,people cry for the government to take actions to stop this.so the good news is that earlier this year, the state council passed a new regulation on house requisition and demolition and passed the right to order forced demolition from local governments to the court.similarly, many other issues concerning public safety is a hot topic on the internet.we heard about polluted air, polluted water, poisoned food.and guess what, we have faked beef.they have sorts of ingredients that you brush on a piece of chicken or fish, and it turns it to look like beef.and then lately, people are very concerned about cooking oil, because thousands of people have been found [refining] cooking oil from restaurant slop.so all these things have aroused a huge outcry from the internet.and fortunately, we have seen the government responding more timely and also more frequently to the public concerns.while young people seem to be very sure about their participation in public policy-making, but sometimes theyre a little bit lost in terms of what they want for their personal life.china is soon to pass the u.s.as the number one market for luxury brands--thats not including the chinese expenditures in europe and elsewhere.but you know what, half of those consumers are earning a salary below 2,000 u.s.dollars.theyre not rich at all.theyre taking those bags and clothes as a sense of identity and social status.and this is a girl explicitly saying on a tv dating show that she would rather cry in a bmw than smile on a bicycle.but of course, we do have young people who would still prefer to smile, whether in a bmw or [on] a bicycle.so happiness is the most popular word we have heard through the past two years.happiness is not only related to personal experiences and personal values, but also, its about the environment.people are thinking about the following questions: are we going to sacrifice our environment further to produce higher gdp? how are we going to perform our social and political reform to keep pace with economic growth, to keep sustainability and stability? and also, how capable is the systemof self-correctness to keep more people contentwith all sorts of friction going on at the same time?i guess these are the questions people are going to answer.and our younger generation are going to transform this country while at the same time being transformed themselves.thank you very much.杨澜ted演讲：重塑中国的一代 中文演讲稿

在来爱尔兰的前一晚，我应邀主持了中国达人秀在上海的体育场和八万现场观众。猜猜谁是表演嘉宾？——苏珊大妈。我告诉她，“我明天要去爱尔兰了。” 她歌声犹如天籁。而且她还可以说点中文。

“送你葱。” 这不是“你好、谢谢”之类的日常用语。这组词翻译过来是免费给你青葱，为什么她要说这个呢？因为这是我们中国版的苏珊大妈很有名的一句歌词。

这位五十几岁的大妈在上海以贩卖蔬菜为生。她喜欢西方的歌剧，但是她不懂任何外语，所以她就把中文蔬菜名填做歌词。当她在体育场里 唱到今夜无人入眠的最后一句时，她唱的是“送你葱”。苏珊大妈和全场八万观众一起唱“送你葱”，多有意思的场面。我想苏珊大妈和这位在上海做蔬菜买卖的都属于不同寻常的人。在业界所谓的娱乐圈，他们最不可能取得成功，但是他们的勇气和才华让他们成功了。一场秀，一个平台给了他们实现梦想的舞台。与众不同不难，从不同的角度看我们都是不一样的。我认为与众不同是好的，因为你有不同的看法，这给你机会去产生不同的影响。我们这代人有幸见证和参与了过去二三十年中国的历史性的转型。

我记得在九十年代，刚从大学毕业的我申请了一份在北京五星级酒店销售部的工作。在日本经理一个半小时的面试后，他最后说：“杨小姐，你有什么问题要问我吗？”我鼓起勇气，定定神然后问道：“您能告诉我销售部到底销售什么？”我对于五星级酒店的销售部的职责一点都摸不着头脑。那是我在五星级酒店的第一天。

同时，我和上千名大学女生参加了一场由中国中央电视台举办的史无前例的公开选拔。制作人告诉我们他们想找一位可爱，天真，美丽的新面孔。当轮到我时，我站起来说道，“为什么女孩在电视上必须是漂亮，甜美，无邪的，像个花瓶？为什么她们不能有她们的想法，她们自己的声音？”

我想我一定得罪了评委。但是事实上，我的发言给他们留下了深刻的印象。接下来我进入了第二轮的选拔，然后是第三轮，第四轮。在经过七轮的选拔后，我胜出了。成为了一个国家电视台黄金时段节目的主持人。

不管你们相不相信，那是中国电视上第一个节目可以允许主持人自由发挥而不是去读审查后的稿子。这个节目的观众人数高达两到三千万。

几年后，我决定去美国哥伦比亚大学进修。之后我有了自己的传媒公司，这是在我刚毕业的时候想都不敢想的。

我和我的团队做了很多事情。在过去的这些年，我采访了上千人。有时候有年轻人走过来对我说：“杨澜，你改变了我的生活。”我也为此而自豪。

今天我想讲讲在社交媒体这个大舞台上的年轻人

李世默ted：

中国崛起与“元叙事”的终结

小乔布斯thomas suarez英语演讲稿ted 大家好，我叫托马斯·斯沃斯，我一直以来对计算机技术着迷。我就给iphone、ipod touch、ipad做了一些应用程序，今天我就来给大家展示几个。第一个应用叫做地球算命，它根据你的运势来改变地球的颜色。我最有名、最成功的应用程序是比斯汀.贾伯，它是一个恶搞贾斯汀·比伯程序。这是因为在我的学校里，许多人有点不喜欢贾斯汀·比伯。所以我就开始做了这个应用了，开始编程，并在2010年的暑假推出了我的作品。a lot of people asked me: how did i make this, a lot of time just because the person you ask a question wants to make an app also, a lot of kids these days like to play games, but now they want to make them and it’s difficult.because not many kids know where to go to find out how to make a program.i mean for soccer you could go to a soccer team, for violin you could get lessons for violin, but what if you want to make an app and kid’s parents might have done these things when they were young, but not many parents made apps.where would you go to find out how to make an app, while this is how i approached, this is what i did.许多人问我，我是怎么做出这些东西来的？大多数情况下，问我这个问题的人也想做一个应用程序试试。现在有许多孩子曾喜欢玩游戏，现在他们可以自己创作游戏了，这很难，因为大多数孩子不知道去哪里学编程。我是说，如果你想学足球，你可以加入一个足球队，如果学拉小提琴，你可以去兴趣班。如果想做应用程序，你该怎么办呢？父母一般叫孩子们做一些事，但是有多少父母会编程呢？你去哪里可以学到编程呢？以下就是我怎么做到的，这就是我做的。first of all, i’ve been programming in multiple other programs just get the basics down, such as python, c, java etc.and then apple released the iphone and with the iphone soft developing, and software development kit is a swift tool for creating and programming an iphone app.this opened up a whole new world possibilities for me, and after playing with the soft developing a little bit i made a couple apps and made some test apps, one of them happen to be earth fortune was ready to put fortune on the app store, and so i persuaded my parents to pay the 99-dollar-fee to be able to put my app on the app stock.they agreed and now my apps are on the app store.首先，我先学了另外的编程，作为基础，比如python、c语言、java编程。不久苹果公司推出了iphone和iphone软件开发工具包。iphone软件开发工具包是一个给iphone编写应用程序的很好的工具。这给我带来了发现新世界一般的可能性，我在小小地玩了一下iphone软件开发工具包之后，我就做了几个应用，并作了测试，其中之一就是地球算命。我很想把我的地球算命放上苹果的应用商店，我就说服我父母去支付进入苹果应用超市所需的99美元。结果他们同意了，我的应用上线了。

我得到了来自我的家庭、朋友、老师，甚至是苹果应用超市的工作人员的鼓励，他们对我有了很大的影响。我从乔布斯身上得到了许多灵感，我在学校里组建了苹果俱乐部。老师对我的俱乐部做出了积极地响应。在我的学校里，每个人都可以来我的俱乐部里学习如何编写应用程序。这就是我与他人分享经验的方式。there are these programs called the ipad pallid program, and some districts have them.i’m fortunate to be part of one;a big challenge is how should the ipad be used on what apps shall we put on the ipads.so we’re getting feedback from teachers at this school to see what kind of apps they like when we design the app and we sell it, it would be free to local districts and other districts we sell to.all the money from that goes to local foundations, these days students usually know a little bit more than teachers with the technology, so, sorry, this is the resource of the teachers and educators should recognize this resource and make good use of it.有一种叫ipad平板电脑编程的组织，有些区里有这类的组织，我有幸成为他们当中的一员。我最大的挑战是怎么利用ipad，我们应该给ipad做什么样的程序。我们在学校里向老师做了反馈信息调查，看看他们喜欢什么样的应用程序。在我们设计好后，我们出售那些应用。本地区的用户可以免费获得，别的地区的用户收费。从中的利润会投入到当地基金会中。现在，学生们，在技术方面，通常会比老师们懂得多。如此看来...对不起，这是老师们的资源，教育工作者应该好好认识并利用它。ted演讲是由ted从每年1000人的俱乐部变成了一个每天10万人流量的社区。为了继续扩大网站的影响力，ted还加入了社交网络的功能，以连接一切“有志改变世界的人”。从2006年起，ted演讲的视频被上传到网上。截至2010年4月，ted官方网站上收录的ted演讲视频已达650个，有逾五千万的网民观看了ted演讲的视频。ted是一下三个英文单词的首字母大写

【t】technology技术 【e】entertainment娱乐 【d】design设计 它是美国的一家私有非盈利机构，该机构以它组织的ted大会著称。the theme of the ted：ideas worth spreading.ambulance 救护车 ——俺不能死；ponderous 肥胖的 ——胖的要死；pest害虫——拍死它；ambition雄心——俺必胜；admire羡慕——额的妈呀篇五：ted英语演讲稿：如何逃出教育的“死亡谷” ted英语演讲稿：如何逃出教育的“死亡谷”

简介：受教育的机会并非人人都有，而在学校的孩子们是否都能学有所成?英国学校教育咨询师sir ken robinson 幽默演讲，如何逃出教育的“死亡谷“? 告诉我们如何以开放的文化氛围培育年轻的一代。

第四篇：TED英语演讲稿

TED英语演讲稿

TED英语演讲稿

I was one of the only kids in college who had a reason to go to the P.O.box at the end of the day, and that was mainly because my mother has never believed in email, in Facebook, in texting or cell phones in general.And so while other kids were BBM-ing their parents, I was literally waiting by the mailbox to get a letter from home to see how the weekend had gone, which was a little frustrating when Grandma was in the hospital, but I was just looking for some sort of scribble, some unkempt cursive from my mother.And so when I moved to New York City after college and got completely sucker-punched in the face by depression, I did the only thing I could think of at the time.I wrote those same kinds of letters that my mother had written me for strangers, and tucked them all throughout the city, dozens and dozens of them.I left them everywhere, in cafes and in libraries, at the U.N., everywhere.I blogged about those letters and the days when they were necessary, and I posed a kind of crazy promise to the Internet: that if you asked me for a hand-written letter, I would write you one, no questions asked.Overnight, my inbox morphed into this harbor of heartbreak--a single mother in Sacramento, a girl being bullied in rural Kansas, all asking me, a 22-year-old girl who barely even knew her own coffee order, to write them a love letter and give them a reason to wait by the mailbox.Well, today I fuel a global organization that is fueled by those trips to the mailbox, fueled by the ways in which we can harness social media like never before to write and mail strangers letters when they need them most, but most of all, fueled by crates of mail like this one, my trusty mail crate, filled with the scriptings of ordinary people, strangers writing letters to other strangers not because they're ever going to meet and laugh over a cup of coffee, but because they have found one another by way of letter-writing.But, you know, the thing that always gets me about these letters is that most of them have been written by people that have never known themselves loved on a piece of paper.They could not tell you about the ink of their own love letters.They're the ones from my generation, the ones of us that have grown up into a world where everything is paperless, and where some of our best conversations have happened upon a screen.We have learned to diary our pain onto Facebook, and we speak swiftly in 140 characters or less.But what if it's not about efficiency this time? I was on the subway yesterday with this mail crate, which is a conversation starter, let me tell you.If you ever need one, just carry one of these.(Laughter)And a man just stared at me, and he was like, “Well, why don't you use the Internet?” And I thought, “Well, sir, I am not a strategist, nor am I specialist.I am merely a storyteller.” And so I could tell you about a woman whose husband has just come home from Afghanistan, and she is having a hard time unearthing this thing called conversation, and so she tucks love letters throughout the house as a way to say, “Come back to me.Find me when you can.” Or a girl who decides that she is going to leave love letters around her campus in Dubuque, Iowa, only to find her efforts ripple-effected the next day when she walks out onto the quad and finds love letters hanging from the trees, tucked in the bushes and the benches.Or the man who decides that he is going to take his life, uses Facebook as a way to say goodbye to friends and family.Well, tonight he sleeps safely with a stack of letters just like this one tucked beneath his pillow, scripted by strangers who were there for him when.These are the kinds of stories that convinced me that letter-writing will never again need to flip back her hair and talk about efficiency, because she is an art form now, all the parts of her, the signing, the scripting, the mailing, the doodles in the margins.The mere fact that somebody would even just sit down, pull out a piece of paper and think about someone the whole way through, with an intention that is so much harder to unearth when the browser is up and the iPhone is pinging and we've got six conversations rolling in at once, that is an art form that does not fall down to the Goliath of “get faster,” no matter how many social networks we might join.We still clutch close these letters to our chest, to the words that speak louder than loud, when we turn pages into palettes to say the things that we have needed to say, the words that we have needed to write, to sisters and brothers and even to strangers, for far too long.Thank you.(Applause)(Applause)

第五篇：ted关于爱情演讲稿2020

爱情不管起点是什么，结局一定是生活。这个世界上最深沉的爱情，不是浪漫，不是攀比，而是我容你，你容我，相濡以沫，天长地久。一起来看看ted关于爱情演讲稿2020，欢迎查阅!

ted关于爱情演讲稿1

当然，我对爱情这个东西还是由始至终的抱有幻想。这个东西，就像他一直给我让我对婚姻都有一种期望一样。我对情感的需求我觉得相对于别人来说是比较大的，在小的时候。也会去赢得家长的关注。甚至为了过分关注而去拼命学习。但是不管怎么样，都无法熄灭我对爱情的向往和迷恋呀。这才是十八岁天空应有的芬芳。这才是十八岁应有的力量。我用我的十八来谈谈我的想法。来谈谈我对于爱情的感官。

最近这一个月其实英语围绕的主题就是爱情。最开始有什么问题是说你相信一见钟情么，你相信笔友或者从未见面但是情根深种么，你对于未来的配偶有什么要求。你希望他的特质是什么。现在我来统一的给出我自己的答案。尽可能还原当时我的想法。第一我对未来配偶基本上没有任何特质的要求。我唯一希望他的仅仅是一句欣赏生活。在平淡里也能陪着我安然的度过。第二，我相信一见钟情。那种怦然心动的世纪毁灭感。却又给你归属感和安全。你会相信。沉溺于这一股爱情之火，在爱情烈焰里焚为灰烬都是值得歌颂的一件事。但是我后面想了想。尽管我对爱情这么向往。这么的不顾一切。但是我连爱情的火山口呀，我都不会想爬上去。我相信不靠面容的爱情。我相信柏拉图似的精神恋爱。我相信着纯粹的一切。应为这是爱情呀。人类最不能控制的一种情感。我们在里边。只能随波逐流。

韩寒写过我想和这个世界谈谈。现在。我想用我的十八跟爱情好好谈一段。

青春里涤荡的花，岁月里波浪的美好。

你还记得青葱记忆里的美好么。

那年，十八。风在吹。

你的羊角辫和笑语呀。

在空中荡。

ted关于爱情演讲稿2

世事沧桑，人生如棋，方寸间的乾坤，已不是文字可以尽数传达。——题记

在这个世界上，有一些人很努力地追求爱情的平等，想要拥抱爱情，唯一不同的是，他们占少数，他们的爱情不被大众认可，我无法判断其中对错，但我想他们值得被尊重，值得被关心。

如果你可以原谅一个知错认罪的孩子，那么为何你不能体谅一个对自己性取向坦诚的孩子呢?

人的一生都在循环，循环地做着直到死去也无法完成的任务。从出生到走路到上学最后结婚，又在履行着上一辈子留下来的义务，传宗接代，人类本身就是一个繁殖的工具，但当我们在爱情面前，我们没有必要伪装与强迫自己接受他人的求爱，与其伤害他人，不如勇敢面对自己的爱。

在父母面前，他们则继续走着看不见的爱情，他们也很艰难，在面对自己心的同时面对着多少压力，但在他们最艰难的时候，没有人认可他们时，父母却给出了一条路，一条宁愿伤害第三个人也不愿承认他们的爱情的路。但也正是这路，让他们的爱情更加确定。

与其伤害第三个人，为何不让他们在一起。在父母面前我想真心的说一句：你们也有爱过的时候，在你们的父母反对你们的时候，你们还不是坚持?你的孩子只是一个普通人，也想要自己抉择一次，请给他们珍惜眼前爱的权利，他们没有错。

我觉得真爱是可以超越性别的，既然可以超越生死，为什么一定要把自己禁锢在性别这个怪圈中呢，只要你在感情中足够勇敢，可以给对方责任，幸福，安全感，并愿意承担你们感情的一切后果，你就是一个值得尊敬的爱人。

有的人也许会说：同性怎么可能有真爱。那么我想说：那你们的爱情长久么?

同样是爱情，为何要分性别，能让你心动的就是你的爱。

ted关于爱情演讲稿3

因为爱情，即使跨越半个世纪，他们仍然相守相伴。——题记

自从到奶奶家，每天傍晚都会陪爷爷奶奶去离小区不远的一座山散散步。

那座山是运货的捷径，所以在山底到半山腰都有盘山公路，夜晚少有车辆经过，加上坡度并不大，所以是周围老年人锻炼的好去处，几天下来，我也认识了不少住在附近的爷爷奶奶，他们常常结伴而行，这其中有这样一对夫妻，每天都可以看见他们，他们也只是偶尔和路人低头示意，便慢慢向山上走去。

今天也是一样。

远远的，我看见老奶奶走得很慢，右腿有些跛，右手紧紧拉着老爷爷的手臂，大半的白发沾着汗水，贴在她满是皱纹的额头，而一旁的老爷爷略微低着头右手拄着自制拐杖，双腿笔直的向前迈着，走得似乎比老奶奶还要慢些，有时，会停下和老奶奶说些什么，他们的衣服都有些旧，宽大的衬衫皱皱的，洗的泛白，走近一些，我听见了很清脆的铃铛声从两人的腰带上传来。落日的余辉从他侧边射来，两人的影子重叠在一起，被拉得很长很长。

突然就觉得很感动。

之后，奶奶告诉我一些事。

原来，那位老爷爷双目失明，曾经中风过，并且三高比较严重，必须每天锻炼，而那位老奶奶曾经出过车祸，口不能言，右腿膝盖以下是假肢，而由于当时安装的问题，加之不是很灵活，她的右腿经常被磨得出血，但仍然每天陪着老爷爷爬山锻炼身体。他们谁也离不开谁，老奶奶需要老爷爷的扶持，老爷爷需要老奶奶的指引，而铃铛便是他们寻找对方唯一标志。

更让人同情的是他们的子女在深圳和温州忙自己的事业，极少回家，老两口靠着退休的每人70元和儿子们偶尔寄来的生活费生活着。70元，在南京偏远地区的老人们很多只能拿到70元的退休工资。

最后，奶奶说：“在五十多年前，他们因为爱情牵手，而现在，他们因为爱情相守。”

跨越半个世纪的爱情，跨越半个世纪的相守。

所谓患难见真情，他们每天过着单调无声的生活，却仍然坚持着守护对方，不离不弃，这样一份爱情，可遇而不可求。

奶奶说很羡慕，爷爷说很难得，而我说很感动。

第二天傍晚，在温暖的落日余晖中，我又见到了他们。

仍然是相互扶持，相互依靠。

长长的影子交错。

我相信，他们会继续走下去，一直一直，不离不弃。

ted关于爱情演讲稿4

大家好。某些同志吧，自己没有勇气，于是乎，以作“第一个吃螃蟹的人”为由，撺掇我和大家唠唠爱情，在场各位除语文老师以外也都老大不小了，就不用避讳什么了。所以，我今天就硬着头皮和脸皮和大家说说这传说中的爱情。

爱情，是缺舵的诺亚方舟，随波飘荡。本来就无始无终，不知哪一天悄然爬上心头。也不知道哪一天，除去心中所谓恒永的烙印。有人常问“是爱情让我们直立行走吗?是爱情维持着生活吗?”我想，不是的!恰恰相反，是爱情让我们不能行走。爱情象力的作用一样，不能维持生活，只能改变生活。爱情的结局是未知的!是甜蜜?是酸涩?是永恒?是短暂?全都无法知晓，更无从知晓。只能存在一天，算做一天。明天会发生什么。此时深爱或浅爱彼此的人都不能知道。更别说什么一生一世了。甜言与蜜语，暖暖的情话，只是对未来美好地希冀，并不可信。

爱情，是老虎，他吞没青春，却不留下一枚硬币。生活中爱情到底是什么?难道是合充一张饭卡，又为了突显亲密而共用一个饭缸?难道是永无止境地结帐?如何理解其中奥妙呢?怎样发现其规律，又是怎样一个历来为繁芜丛杂的意识形态所掩盖的简单事实呢?一定有人考虑过。我也想过，可得到的只有困惑!爱情，耗费着人们的精力，时间与金钱。当岁月跃然纸上，脸色渐渐灰黄，眼圈有了由黄至黑的色彩渗透与渐变，可能，唯一能安慰我们的只有声嘶力竭地号叫，一次次酒精的刺激。爱情投资有风险，各位股民请慎重!

说了许多爱情的不好，又莫名地为之打不平。什么事都得辨证地看嘛!白居易讲话了“老来多健忘，唯不忘相思”自己喜欢的影像在头脑里走来走去，于是，我们就在爱情的魔圈中走去走来。

总结：无论什么事都要有个度。特别是学生时代的爱情，更要找到透析般的临界状态，才是真正地快乐与美好。

仅以一篇胡诹，献给黑暗中摸索前进和光明中嘹亮放歌的勇士们!

ted关于爱情演讲稿5

尊敬的老师们，亲爱的同学们：

大家好!

我有一个亲切的、爱我的妈妈，还有一个严厉的、同样爱我的爸爸，我们三人组成了一个快乐圆满的家庭。但有一件事情，使我十分惭愧，让我至今记忆犹新。

那是在我七岁的时候，我的家境很一般，爸爸妈妈开了一个馄饨店，虽然早上人不是很多，但到了中午，人就会拥挤起来。一天到晚，爸爸妈妈都在为生活奔波。渐渐的，天转凉了，人们都穿上了棉袄，不知不觉中，已经是冬天了。

一个星期天，爸爸去外地进货去了。妈妈带着我逛商场，我们走过了两家店，我突然看到了一个粉红色的布娃娃，那正是我梦寐以求的东西。于是，我拉了妈妈已皱掉的衣角，指着那家店，说道：“我要那个布娃娃。”妈妈看了一眼价格，迟疑了一下说：“不行，孩子，我们马上还要去买馄饨馅。”

“我要，我要，我就要!”我的倔脾气一下涌了上来，可就是因为这次冲动，让我后悔了很久很久……

我跑出商店，妈妈一把拉住我，我还是不顾妈妈着急的神情，挣脱妈妈的手，含着委屈的泪水，冲进了茫茫人海中。

天渐渐地黑了，我还是乖乖地回家了。可是大门却紧锁着。我坐在冰凉的地上，一个小时过去了，三个小时过去了，五个小时过去了，妈妈还没有回来。饥饿和恐惧包围着我，我困了，不知不觉靠在门边睡着了。

我梦见一双温暖的手，向我伸来，我企图用力地握住它，可是，它却不见了。我从梦中惊醒，看见妈妈满脸灰尘，双眼布满了血丝，为了找我，这一夜，妈妈走遍了大街小巷……

我忍不住哭了，眼泪滴在妈妈手中的布娃娃身上。

每当想起这件事，我就后悔不已。我终于明白，妈妈是爱我的，妈妈的爱使我无比幸福快乐与安心。因为我相信，无论我走到哪里，妈妈都会找到我……