第一篇：4人英语话剧剧本 Whose fault
Whose Fault Cast
Mr.Green Miss Blue Police Nurse Doctor DaughterScene I
(Green Garden St.)
(During the rush hours, when the street is crowded , Mr.Green is driving past the red light , unexpectedly a car accident happens...Two people came out of their cars angrily...)Miss Blue: Oh!It's you, Mr.Green...Do you know how to drive your car?
Mr.Green: You see that I was driving across the road!Wow!There is a dent on my beloved BENZ.Miss Blue: My BMW has got a dent too, you should compensate me.(While they are quarrelling, later on, the police comes.)
Police: What's happened?
Mr.Green: She has bumped into my car!
Miss Blue: No!It is himself that drove past the red light...(Quarrel again...)
Police: Has any one been injured?
Mr.Green: I feel headache , foot ache , ache very much.Miss Blue: I ache all over too.(Both of them mourn painfully...)
Police: Then I'll call an ambulance(O-E-O-E...).Scene II
(Blue Sky Hospital-Emergency)
(Ambulance sends them to the hospital)Nurse: Who is injured?
(Both of them say it is themselves at the same time...)
Nurse: What's your name, Mr.? Mr.Green: Call me DPP Green.Nurse:(Unhappy facial expression)Oh!Go to the corner and sit there.Mr.Green: But...(nurse interrupts)Nurse: Go!Don't speak any words.....what's your name, Miss?
Miss Blue: My name is KMT Blue.Nurse:(gentle and smiles)Oh, Miss this side, please.Would you tell me how you are feeling? Miss Blue: Oh!I ache all over...Nurse: OK!I'll help you stop the pain first, and then the doctor will treat you in a while.(Mr.Green comes over to require medical treatment, but rejected)
Mr.Green: Nurse, I...I feel...Nurse: Wait there, didn't you hear me?
(Mr.Green goes back helplessly, the doctor comes over at this moment...)
Nurse: The young lady called KMT Blue...KMT Blue.Doctor: Ok!I see...How are you, Miss?
Miss Blue: I got an car accident and I ache all over...Doctor:(Check)It's ok...don't worry about it.I'll give you some medicine.You'll get well soon......Miss Blue: Thank you, doctor..(Miss Blue leaves.)
Doctor: Next one.(Mr.Green comes in and Dr.reads his medical record)You are called DPP Green!
Mr.Green: Yeah!Any problem with that ?
Doctor: Hmm...(Consider)DPP Green(Raise up voice)? What's wrong with you?
Mr.Green: I ache all over-headache, toothache and foot ache(The doctor interrupts him impatiently)...Doctor: I...I...I see, Miss Lin – give Mr.Green an injection...Mr.Green: What? An injection?(Nurse takes out the syringe)
Nurse: Where do you want to inject?
(Mr.Green is frightened and shivering...)
Mr.Green: Well, doctor...that...I do not ache anymore, I...I want to leave.Nurse: Wait!Don't go...(Nurse pulls Mr.Green and forces him to enter the injection room)
Mr.Green: Wow!......That hurts!
(Miss Blue goes out of the emergency room,but Mr.Green leaves in terrible pain.)Scene III
(Taiwan House)
(Both of them come back home, then open the door and go into the house at the same time...)Daughter: Dad...Mom...What happened to both of you? Dad, you look pale.Mom, you look terrible, too.Mr.Green: I would not be like this if not for your mother...Miss Blue: What!That is your father's fault and he blames me impudently for...(Daughter is cold and shrugs–then watching TV)
Daughter: Oh!I understand it.Even since the Presidential Election, there's no peace in our home.(Both of them are still quarrelling....)
第二篇：英语话剧剧本
英语话剧剧本
在一个鸟语花香的一个早上，站长一如既往地坐在办公室，一边翘着二郎腿，一边单手拿起一本咖啡喝。在他的眼里，他觉得，今天又是一个休闲的日子，只要坐在办公室，有空出去外面巡查一下环境，就可以回家看电视去了。但他没有想到，今天在他的身边竟然会发生一些令他抓破头皮的事情。
他喝完咖啡，慢悠悠地走出值班室，挺着一个大肚子，威武地巡视着地铁站内的人群。每个人都匆匆地来匆匆地去，从来没有留意过身边的人和事。站长这个时候伸伸懒腰，正准备回值班室大睡一觉的时候，突然不知道哪里出来的一个人把他撞倒了。站长甩了一个跟头，挺笨拙地爬起来刚想大骂一顿的时候，却首先听到一把声音，有点怯懦地说：“对不起对不起” 站长这个时候擦擦眼睛，开始打量眼前的这个人：他的衣着很随意，脏兮兮的样子，而且还带着一副墨镜。站长就开始骂了：“你没长眼睛吗？这样也能撞上我！”然后那个人就回答说：“我是一个盲人，我都看不到要在哪里候车了。”站长听了之后，也见到他是一个残疾人，便说：“没事啦，我是这里的站长，如果你不知道哪里候车的话，可以咨询一下当班的值班员嘛。不过既然你遇上了我，我就帮你带路吧。”这时候盲人也说了一声：“好的，非常感谢你。”于是，站长让盲人一手牵着他，一手摸着扶手，慢慢地下楼梯到乘车站台。站长拖着盲人慢慢地走，突然脚底下一绊，整个人又甩了一跤，幸好盲人一手扶着墙壁没有摔倒。这时候站长发火了，起来就说一句：“特么的是谁！”这一次没有人回答他。于是站长低头一看，有一个乘客正躺在地上一动也不动了。站长于是就怕了，马上松开牵着盲人的手，盲人觉察到不对劲，就问：“发生什么事了”站长结结巴巴地回答：“地…地上…躺…躺着…一个人啊！！”盲人显然要比站长冷静：“快去看一下他是否还活着”于是站长弯下腰，问一句：“先生请问你还清醒吗？”没有回应。于是站长又弯下腰用耳朵贴着他的胸口听他的心跳声，可是出人意料地听不到。站长这时候怕了，他用手擦了一下额头的汗，然后又颤抖地把手伸向躺着的人鼻子，谁知道这时候传来呼呼的鼻鼾声。站长定了一下惊，然后又闻了一下他的衣服，一股很浓烈的酒精味，大概是喝醉酒了吧。于是站长让醉酒的人继续躺着，扶了盲人上车之后，然后就来看了一下醉酒的人，结果发现还没醒。站长本来想着呼叫值班员前来帮忙，但正是午饭时间，值班室空无一人，又不能置醉酒人一直在这里，于是自己便背起醉酒人爬上楼梯直到回到值班室。此时的站长已经气喘吁吁地，累个半死之下于是什么都不管了，躺在地上呼呼地睡着了…
第三篇：英语话剧剧本
《狼来了》
先放几段关于碰瓷、小孩扶老大娘等等新闻！
解说：（这是一个最好的时代，这是一个最坏的时代，这是一个讲信用的时代，又是一个欺骗的时代；这是一个光明的时代，又是一个黑暗的时代。）这是最好的时代，也是最坏的时代；这是智慧的年代，也是愚蠢的年代；这是信仰的时期，也是怀疑的时期；这是光明的季节，也是黑暗的季节；这是希望的春天，也是失望的冬天；大伙儿面前应有尽有，大伙儿面前一无所有；大伙儿正在直登天堂；大伙儿正在直落地狱。
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way。下面我们组将给大家带来一个关于社会诚信的话剧，他的名字是《狼来了》，请大家欣赏，谢谢！
第一幕
老大爷1：（一瘸一拐地上场，后面不远处有一对情侣、两个群众中也走着，走着走着老大爷突然摔倒了）啊，疼死了（捂着胸，好像是心脏病发作），好难受呀！（对着周围的人说）帮帮我吧！
情侣男：（两个人一起跑过去）大爷，你怎么了？ 情侣女：大爷好像是心脏病发作，（此时大爷已经奄奄一息），快找一找他身上是不是有急救药！
群众1：（群众1、2一起跑过来），我来帮你们，看看兜里面，（翻了一遍）群中2：终于找到了，快给大爷服下（大家一起帮忙，把大爷抬到安全的地方，把药服下去，不一会大爷就醒过来，精神了许多）（此处可以表演的搞笑一点）
老大爷1：谢谢你们，非常感谢你们，如果没有你们救我，我现在可能就已经死了！周围所有人：不用谢，这些都是我们应该做的！情侣女：大爷，你的家在哪里？我们送你回家吧！老大爷1：（很激动的）谢谢你们了，不麻烦你们了，我现在感觉很好了，可以自己回家了！谢谢你们了！
结局：（大爷慢慢地走者，大家站在原地注视着老大爷的背影）大家都说：老大爷注意身体！老大爷1：谢谢，谢谢，这个世界上还是好人多呀，好人多呀！我爱你们，我爱这个美丽的世界！这个世界是如此的美丽。
解说：（《爱的奉献》歌声起）这个世界上还是好人多呀！有爱的世界是温暖的，只要人人都献出一点爱，这个世界就会变成美丽的人间。
第二幕
（情侣男骑着自行车载着女孩，听着歌曲，悠哉游哉地骑着，后面一个老大爷2骑着自行车一直跟着这对情侣，想碰瓷骗点钱，突然老大爷2加大速度和这对情侣并行突然倒掉，此时旁边正好有两位群众看到这一情景）
老大爷2：（捂着腿，作痛苦状）痛死了，痛死了！（对着情侣大喊）你们没长眼睛吗？把我的腿都撞折了，赔钱，快赔钱！
情侣男：大爷，你怎么了？我们没碰到你呀，你怎么会自己倒了呢？你还好吧！老大爷2：（怒吼道）你没若碰到我，我怎么会倒呢？就是你们碰得我，我才倒掉的！我现在腿折了，不能走路了（作瘸腿的动作），快赔我钱，赔我钱！
情侣女：老大爷，我们真没碰到你呀！天可以作证，你怎么能讹诈我们呢？ 老大爷2：腿好痛呀，痛死了！救命呀，快救人呀！有人撞人了还不赔钱！群众1：小伙子呀，我看到刚才的情况了，你没碰到这位老大爷，你是清白的，我可以证明。群众2：我也可以证明你们的清白，咱们还是打110吧！让警察来处理这件事吧！老大爷2：我好痛呀！你们怎么可以这样对待以为老人呢！我是受害者呀！情侣男：（拿起手机拨打110）喂，你好，我这里是东北大学逸夫教学楼302，这发生了一起交通讹诈事故，我们请求帮助！
（警笛起）
警察：请问，发生什么事了？(Excuse me, what happened)?
老大爷2：（突然爬起来，走了几步，又瘸起腿来，又坐回去了）警察同志，我被这两位情侣撞到了，我的腿被撞折了，我好痛呀！
警察1：（对着情侣）是这样的情况吗？请你们叙述一下刚才发生的事。
情侣男：我们骑着自行车走着走着就看到这位老大爷自己倒下去了，他自己倒的，我们没有碰到他。
情侣女：是呀，我们根本没有碰到他，你可以问问这些群众呀，他们是目击者。
警察2：（对着群众1、2）能叙述一下你看到的情况吗？(Can you describe what you see?)
群众1：刚才那位老大爷自己骑着自行车摔倒了，他确要讹诈这对情侣，太不道德了。群众2：是呀，是那位老大爷自己摔倒的，和那对情侣没关系，我可以作证。警察1：（对着情侣）现在基本情况已经弄清楚了，你们是无辜的，可以走了。（对着老大爷）老大爷，你感觉还好吗？所有的人都说你是自己摔倒的，你还有什么要说的吗？
老大爷：你怎么把他们放走了，我无话可说，就是他们把我撞倒的，就是他们把我撞倒的！为什么为什么？？（捂着腿做痛苦状）好痛呀，好痛呀！警察2：老大爷，你还好吧，我先送你去医院吧！(Old man, are you alright, I'll take you to the hospital!)
（警笛声起，警察1、2载着老人就走了，此处可以表演的搞乐一点）解说：（《
》歌声起）这个社会本来充满了爱，充满了温暖，可是就是因为这些人的欺骗行为，让那些拥有爱心的人们一次次受到伤害，这些伤害深深地刺痛了他们的心，一次次冲击着我们这个社会的道德底线。
第三幕
解说：自从那次老大爷2被警察戳穿后，他依然在行骗，这次他还在路上寻找着目标等待碰瓷，不过这次他的身体确实出现了问题，他的心脏病突然发作了。
老大爷2：（自己一个人骑着自行车，吹着口哨，很悠哉游哉，突然车子倒了，这次他真的犯病了，心脏病发作了）啊，（双手捂着胸）痛死了，救命呀，救命呀，救命（声音逐渐变小）啊，啊！
情侣女：老公，你听，好像有人喊“救命”，你看！前面有个老大爷摔倒了！
（两个人一起快跑过去，同时后面的两个群众也一起跑过去，大家围在一起看着老大爷）情侣男：啊！我的天呀！这不就是上次骗我们的那位老大爷吗？ 群众1：是呀，就是他，我认识他
群众2：就是他，他又想骗我们呀！没门，我们决不能再上当受骗了！老大爷2：救救我呀，我真的很痛呀！我这次是真的，救救我吧！情侣男：老大爷，你的演技有很大长进呀，不过我们不会再受骗了！（大家互相看了看对方）
群众1：是呀，我们不能在一个地方摔倒两次。群众2：是呀，我们还是走吧！
情侣女：老公，咱们快走吧，一会就要上课了！快点！大家一块喊了一句：Let‘s go！老大爷2：（老大爷趴在地上，目光无神，看着大家远去的背影，伸手朝向远方，说）救命呀，救命！（哀叹了一声）自作孽不可活呀！上帝，下辈子我一定要作一个好人！
（老大爷，作非常痛苦状，头磕地，死去！）过了一段时间（急救车声响起），120急救车来了，下来两个医生 医生1（警察1饰演）：（用听诊器停了一会，又用手试了试鼻子处是否还有呼吸）没有呼吸了，拿不来吧！医生2（警察2饰演）：（拿来一块布，两个医生共同把布盖子尸体上）是呀，如果能及时吃一粒救心丸就好了，太可惜了！(Yes，if it is good to eat a grain of JiuXinWan timely, what a shame!)
（120急救车笛声响起，结束！）解说：（《
》歌声起）这样的结局真的很悲哀，这样悲哀的故事在现实世界中很多，可能就在此刻还在发生着这样的事情。这就是“狼来了”的故事，某些人总是在利用大家的爱心，最终真的狼来了的时候，确没人再愿意献出爱心，因为爱一旦被欺骗了，就再也无法得到，最终这些人被“狼”吃了！
第四篇：英语话剧剧本
英语话剧剧本：4人英语话剧 Another day in paradise 场景简单，语言适中，4个主要人物，推荐。适合课上演出，很有意义，关于亲情
Characters: Angel: A chief broadcaster.Anny: A primary school girl who had called so much in order to look for her mother.Anny’s father Anny’s teacher Anny’s classmates Divide the stage into two parts.On the left: Children’s ward, a chair, some flowers.On the right: A desk, a chair, a lamp, some books.(幕启，舞台左半亮，右半暗)(The phone is ringing)Old woman: Hello!Anny（怯生生地）: Hello, I, I want mum.Is that mum? Old woman: Oh, I’m granny.I’m not mum.Anny: I’m sorry.（电话挂断声，拨号声又起）A young woman: Hello!Anny（怯生生地）: Hello!I want mum.Is that mum? Young woman: Are you joking? I’m not married.（电话继续响，右半舞台亮）Angel: Hello!Anny（鼓起勇气）: I want mum.Is that mum? Angel: Who’s that speaking? Anny: I’m Anny, your Anny.Angel: Anny？（充满疑惑）。（略为思索后，用母亲的声调）Where are you? Anny（仿佛遇见母亲，忍不住哭起来）: Mum,（哭声，欲语泪先流，又猛然惊觉）Mum, mum, I’m not crying.Angel（安慰地，担心地）: You are a nice little girl.Anny: Mum, why don’t you come to see me? Dad says you will come back if I am well behaved.Mum, don’t you miss me? Angel（慈爱地）: Of course, I do.I do miss you? Anny: Really? Angel: Yes.I miss you so much.Anny: Mummy!Angel: En„ Anny: Mummy!Angel: Yes? Anny（笑若银铃）(Angel 慈爱地笑，心略有所安)Anny(突然又哭了): But mummy, why don’t you come back? I’m ill.Angel（关切地）: Anny, where are you? Tell me, where are you? Anny: Mummy, I’m in hospital now.I felt pain, but I didn’t cry.Dad says the one who cries is not a good girl.Then you won’t come back.Mummy, can you come back to see me? I’m waiting for you with no tears.Angel: Anny, I’m, I’m not„ Oh, yes, mummy will come back to see you（Dad推门入，见Anny在打电话，连忙夺过）Dad: I’ve told you not to call anybody else.（对着电话）Sorry, I’m really sorry.The child has disturbed you.Angel: Never mind.I’m a mother, too.I understand her.May I know the truth? Dad: Eh„, her mum isn’t here.So she called and called.Angel: Where’s Anny’s mother? You divorced? Dad: No, no.I hope she would come back.But„
Angel: You don’t trust in me? I’m Angel, the chief broadcaster of the hot line.Dad（回头看Anny）: Then, I’ll tell you the truth some other day.Angel:All right.(灯暗景换)On the left: Anny’s sitting room.On the right: Anny’s classroom.（左右同时演绎）Left: Dad: Anny’s mum passed away in a tracffic accident six years ago.She told me to hide the truth.This is the letter for Anny.Right: Teacher: Children, in this class.Let’s enjoy Anny’s composition “A letter to mummy”.Angel, Anny同时，时空错接，音乐起)Angel: Anny, my dearest baby!Anny: Mummy, my dearest mummy!Angel: When we played hide and seek, I was found easily.Anny: When we played hide and seek, I could found you easily.Angel: But this time, you can’t find me.Anny: But this time, I can’t find you.Angel: Baby, we have a date.When you are 14, you can find me.Anny: Mummy, we have a date.Dad says when I am 14, I can find you.Angel: Baby, the game lasts so long.I wonder if you have the courage to go on.Anny: Mummy, don’t worry.I grow up with your arms around me in my dream.Angel: Anny, if the time is so long, mummy will talk with you when you are looking at our photo.Anny: Mum, the letter you left to me is so long.I read it every night, again and again.Angel: Anny, your birthday present is on the wardrobe.Anny: Mummy, I’ve known the truth.Every time I take a bus, I can see your dad eyes.Angel: Anny, I’m really worried if you will be so sad after your 14th birthday.Is there anyone to love you all his life? Anny: Mummy, I’ll never give up.I believe there is a call to the paradise.I will love Dad.I will love myself.I can fly with my own wings one day.Angel: Anny, my dear.Anny: Mummy, be safe all the way.There are no tears in paradise.(灯亮，谢幕)
第五篇：英语话剧剧本
英语话剧剧本：5人英语话剧剧本-Yes Means No(似是而非)本文来自: 教客网剧本大全(http://)详细出处参考：http:// Summary:
Teddy Lawson is going to marry Edith Merrill and he asks his father, Mr.Lawson, to finance his honeymoon.However, Teddy's father wants him to learn to say NO first because Teddy always says YES to everyone who makes a request.They make a deal that Mr.Lawson will give Teddy one hundred dollars for every time Teddy says NO in half an hour, but if Teddy says YES just once, Teddy forfeits every NO-Mr.Lawson's secretary, Miss Collins, will make the strict account of every NO.In order to have a nice honeymoon, Teddy tries hard to carry out his father's orders and answer NO as many as possible to everything asked, even though he is running the risks of breaking his father's deal with T.J.Morgan and losing his own sweet heart--Edith Merrill...TEDDY:(Coming to his father's desk L.)
Dad, there's something I want to tell you.LAWSON: Oh, is that so!What is it?
TEDDY: Well, Dad, I've just proposed to Edith Merrill and she's accepted me.LAWSON: Going to get married, eh? When do you intend doing this?
TEDDY: Right away.That's why I wanted to see you, and of course I know you'll finance the honeymoon.LAWSON: Oh...I will, will I?(Pounds desk, rises and comes to Teddy C.)I'll tell you that I'm ashamed of you.You haven't any backbone...you can't say NO!I left you in charge of my business last week just to see how you'd conduct it.And you did great.Ha!...If I'd stayed away another week, you'd have ruined me(Strolls up C.)TEDDY: I did the best I could!
LAWSON: Then you'd make a fine business man.(Coming down C.)The most essential thing in a business man's life is to be able to say “NO.” At all times NO.Especially in a credit business like mine.But you said YES to everyone who asked for extra time.(Takes a few steps L.)
TEDDY: But they always cried to me and I just couldn't say “no.”
LAWSON: Well, you'll learn to say “no” before I finance any honeymoon.(Lawson is below desk L.Phone rings, Lawson turns to his desk, grabs phone quickly and sits down.)Lawson talking...!(Listens a second.)NO！!I...said...NO.(Listens again.)Then I'll foreclose.That's final..NO!(Lawson hangs up receiver.Turns to Teddy.)That's how I make my money..being able to say NO..NO..NO.(Pounds desk with each “No!” Rises and comes to Teddy C.)And that's the way I want my son to be before he shoulders the responsibility of marriage.TEDDY: Well, give me another chance, Dad...and I'll try to make good.LAWSON:(He sneers the last Word and takes a stroll up C.)Do you mean it?
TEDDY: You bet I do
LAWSON:(Coming down L of Teddy.)
TEDDY: All right...I'll give you another chance.You want money for a honeymoon?...Very well!You take charge of this office while I go to lunch and I'll give you one hundred dollars for every time you say NO.LAWSON: One hundred dollars?
TEDDY: Right!Do you think you can do it? LAWSON: I'll try.TEDDY:(Crosses R to Miss Collins.)Miss Collins, I want you to remain in this office with my son while I'm gone.You can sit at my desk.(Miss Collins doesn't move immediately.)NOW!(She jumps and crosses stage.)
COLLINS: Yes, sir!
LAWSON:(Crosses L.)And I don't want you to leave it for a second.Understand?(Miss Collins nods.)And I want you to keep strict account of every time my son says NO.But remember, if he answers YES just once...he forfeits every “NO.”(Turning to Teddy.)Are you on? TEDDY: Yes.(He realizes what he has said and clasps hand over his mouth.)
LAWSON:(Crossing R to door, taking coat and hat from hall-tree.)Very well.You'll be in charge here for one-half hour...(Looks at watch.)Now remember...not one “Yes.”...It must be “NO” to everything.(Lawson exits and slams door.)(Teddy stands for a second smiling.Phone rings, and he rushes across stage to phone on desk L, and picking it up shouts into it.TEDDY: NO..POSITIVELY NO!(Hangs up.Strolls across stage, grinning at Miss Collins, who is amazed.)That's two...put them down.COLLINS:(Writing.)Yes, sir.(Phone rings.Teddy grabs it again, while Miss Collins warns him to be careful.)You better hear who it is, sir.It may be important.TEDDY: Hello?(Repeating what is said to him.)Is Mr.Lawson in? NO!Do I mind speaking for him? NO!What?...NO!
COLLINS:(Rising and pleading.)Don't you think you'd better hang up, sir?
TEDDY:(To Miss Collins.)No.Put them all down...there were five of them.(Into phone.)No, no, no!(Raising three fingers to Miss Collins.)I wasn't talking to you...I was talking to Mr.Lawson's secretary.What? No!I should worry? No!(Hangs up.Laughing heartily at his results so far.)COLLINS:(Fearfully.)Aren't you going a little too far, sir?
TEDDY: No!There's another.Are you keeping strict account of them?(Crosses to desk L.)How many are there?
COLLINS: Just...just thirteen, sir.TEDDY:(Taking C and dancing a step.)Thirteen, eh? COLLINS: But isn't that an unlucky number, sir?
TEDDY: No!That makes fourteen!(Teddy crosses to desk R.)Well, that's a trip to California, anyway.(Phone rings.But this time Miss Collins gets it first.)
COLLINS: Hullo? Just a second, please.(Now to Teddy in a whisper.)It's T.J.Morgan to see your father.TEDDY: No!
COLLINS: Shall I tell him to come back?
TEDDY: No!
COLLINS: But he wants to know if he can see Mr.Lawson? TEDDY: Tell him NO!(Emphatically.Crosses R.)
COLLINS:(Into phone.)No!(Hangs up.)
TEDDY:(Enjoying it all immensely.)Add three more to the list.How many is that now?(Teddy crosses to desk L.)(At this point T.J.Morgan rushes into room unceremoniously.)MORGAN: What's the idea of telling me I can't see Lawson? Is he in?(Comes C as Teddy circles below him to R.)
TEDDY: No!(Miss Collins keeps marking every “no.”)
MORGAN:(Turning to Miss Collins L.)Then who said Lawson wouldn't see me? Was it you?(Mill Collins starts to answer but Teddy butts in.)
TEDDY: No!(Hoists a finger for Miss Collins to get the additional “no” on the record.)
MORGAN:(Turning back to Teddy R.)Oh, then it was you?
TEDDY:(Gulping.)No!
MORGAN:(Confused.)Then who was it? Was there anybody else in the office? TEDDY: No!
MORGAN: Can't you say anything but “NO-O-O!?” TEDDY:(Imitating his dragged out “No.”)“NO-O-O!”
MORGAN:(Waving his hand in disgust.)You're a silly ass...Will you deny that? TEDDY: For a hundred dollars?..NO!(Signals Miss Collins to add it on the list.)
MORGAN: You're impossible.You tell him that T.J.Morgan was here to see him about that lumber deal.He likes to make money the same as everybody, doesn't he?
TEDDY: Why...er..NO!
MORGAN: What?(He shakes his finger in Teddy's face.)Do you mean to tell me he's not interested in that lumber deal any more?(Miss Collins tries to speak.Morgan turns to her quickly.)Were you going to say something? TEDDY: No..Shefifteen-
TEDDY: Don't skip any.COLLINS: Just forty-six, sir.TEDDY:(Excitedly, taking stage.)Forty-six? Why, it'll be a trip around the world.I must make it an even fifty.(Offstage R, Lawson's voice is heard in warm argument.)
LAWSON: You just come in here with me.We'll see what this is all about.(He enters swiftly, followed by Edith and Mr.Morgan.They surround Teddy who has sneaked to C, half frightened.)Now Miss Merrill, ask him before me.EDITH:(Half crying.)Didn't you tell me your father paid you to break off our engagement? TEDDY: NO!(She staggers back amazed.)
MORGAN: When I asked you about the lumber deal, what did you say? TEDDY: NO!
LAWSON:(Coming toward Teddy and shaking his fist.)Don't you know any better than that? TEDDY: NO!(Calling to Miss Collins on opposite side.)That makes fifty！!
LAWSON:(Bewildered)What's the idea?
TEDDY: The idea is that I've carried out your orders...I haven't said one...(Catches himself.)what you said not to say.LAWSON:(Shaking fist in Teddy's face.)Do you think I'm a complete idiot? TEDDY: No!(To Miss Collins.)There's another one...put it down.LAWSON:(To Miss Collins.)Don't you DARE put that down.I've had enough of this.MORGAN:(Approaching Lawson L, and brushing Teddy aside.)I think I understand it all now.It was a joke.LAWSON: Absolutely!(Going to door R with Morgan.)We'll talk it over at the club tonight.(Morgan exits R.)TEDDY:(Meeting his father C, and grasping his coat lapel.)Make a check for me...for five thousand dollars.Fifty “No's,” you know.LAWSON:(Crossing to desk L.)How could anyone say fifty “No's” in fifteen minutes?
Imagine what I could do in an hour.My middle name is Speed.LAWSON: All right, I'm the goat.I'll give you the check.Then use some of that speed in getting out of here.(He turns to desk L, and sees Miss Collins seated at it.)Well, what are you doing at my desk?
COLLINS:(Rising, frightened.)Why, you told me to sit here, sir.Shall I go to my own desk, sir? LAWSON:(Shouting.)YES!(Miss Collins crosses R, to her own desk.)TEDDY:(Crossing to his father's desk.)Did I hear you say YES?
LAWSON: NO!(Writes in checkbook.)
EDITH:(Coming to Teddy C.)Oh, Teddy, I see it all now.“No” meant “Yes”..when you said “no.”
TEDDY: “No”..“Yes”...wait...When I said “No”...when I said...I...(Conflised.)Oh, I only know we are going on a honeymoon.(They kiss and embrace.)
LAWSON:(Rises with check in hand and comes C.)Here's your check.I made it out for ten thousand instead of five, because ten will take you farther away and keep you away longer.TEDDY:(Taking check and looking at it.)Why, Dad!You're wonderful..you're marvelous..you're...(Changing tone.)IS IT GOOD?(Father swells with satisfaction on praise, but turns furiously on last line.)Well, come on, darling.Good-bye, Dad...(They both start for door R.)(Teddy catches hand of Edith who waits for him in door R, and they plunge off happily together.)(Lawson and Miss Collins stare after them, Miss Collins chuckling with delight.)The End
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