英语幽默短剧剧本

第一篇：英语幽默短剧剧本

中小学英语版情景对话

英语情景对话--交流

Getting people’s attention 引起别人注意

1.Can I talk to you ? 能和你谈一下吗?

2.Can we talk? 能一块儿谈谈吗?

3.Let‟s talk.我们谈谈吧。

4.Excuse me.You got a minute? 对不起，能耽误你一分钟吗?

5.May I have a word with you? 能和你说句话吗?

Launching conversation with a piece of news.讲述一条消息来打开话题

1.Listen up.听着。

2.Now hear this!你听着!

3.Get a load of this.你听听这个。(load:大量，许多)

4.Are you ready for this? 想听着。

5.Guess what? 你猜怎么的?

Asking other people if they understand 问别人是否听明白了

1.Do you understand? 你明白吗?

2.Do you know that I mean? 知道我的意思吗?

3.See what I mean? 明白我的意思吗?

4.Do you know what I‟m talking about? 知道我讲的是什么吗?

5.Know what I‟m saying? 知道我在说什么吗?

Indicating that you understand 表示明白对方的意思.1.I hear you 知道了.2.I got you.明白了.3.I can see that.这一点我明白.4.I hear what you‟re saying.我明白你的意思.5.Okay, I know just what you mean.嗯,我明白你的意思.If you do not catch what was said 假如你没听清对方说的话.1.I beg you pardon? 对不起,你说什么?

2.What was that? 你说什么?

3.Say what? 你说什么?

4.Excuse me? What did you say? 对不起,你说什么?

5.I‟m sorry.I missed that.对不起,我没听清.英语情景对话,商务英语对话I„d like some apples.2.-Where can I buy some stationery?

-Let„s look at the shopping guide.Oh, it„s on the ground Floor.3.-Could I buy half a kilo oranges?

-Certainly.Here you are.4.-Will you please show me that radio?

-Certainly.5.-How much is the radio?

-Ninety yuan.6.-Good morning, sir.May I help you? Traditional Chinese MM.太子丹：I must show you the trump card.Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea.It is a brand new product of Unilever China.荆柯（激动）：Slimming tea!I have dreamed of it for thousands of times.My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn‟t reduce my weight.阿三：You want? Speak up if you want!Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I‟m very glad, you still have to speak up.Take it!Do you really like? Really?你不是真的想要吧？难道你真的想要吗……（《No matter》音乐起，荆轲先与阿三跳探戈，拥入怀中，又甩出去，阿三做呕吐状。然后荆轲与太子丹跳伦巴，最后太子丹摆一个女性化的造型，向后弯腰并抬其中一条腿，荆轲做调戏状。）

荆柯(诚恳状)Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you.太子丹与阿三（撞胯，击掌）Yeah!Action Ш（《大话西游》主题曲响起）荆珂挽着妻子，太子丹,阿三在后.阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River.荆珂：Just stop here, please.Farewell, my friends 太子丹：I will miss you, baby.（太子丹，阿三下。停顿。《泰坦尼克号》主题曲起，荆轲与妻子做Jack和rose在船头的经典造型，忽然荆轲看到一个美女——此时一个中国古典美女经过，向荆轲抛媚眼，并抛下定情手绢。荆轲高兴的盯着美女看，妻子发觉不对，扭过头来。）

荆珂（急忙收敛）：Darling, I love you.妻子：I love you!You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救赎》）荆珂(流泪)：I love you more.In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you.(哪怕是世界末日我都会爱着你，选自《飘》)妻子：Well.Be a man, just do it!I will be right here waiting for you.荆珂（欲走还留，执子之手又曰）：Sweetheart!You must do me this honor...promise me you will survive...that you will never give up...no matter what happens...no matter how hopeless...promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克号沉船时，Jack对Rose的倾诉）.妻子:“I promise.” 荆轲:“Never let go.“

妻子:”I promise.I will never let go, Jack.I'll never let go.“（荆轲的发音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克号》的台词。）妻子努力挤出几滴眼泪，荆珂上船，渐渐远去

妻子：It‟s a good day to die.Never come back.Never…… Never……

妻子(掏出手机拨号，阿三接手机)： Thank you very much.As soon as I get the life assurance $1000, 000, I will transfer half of it, $500,000 to your account.阿三：Okay okay!旁白：Then Jingke was sent to Qin and finally killed by Yingzheng.英语幽默情景短剧

A Beautiful Trap英语话剧剧本

两位女大学生出去找兼职，却被欺骗。Cast Gwen: Senior high school student Rita: Mom / Customer A Fanny: Waitress Ivy: Gwen’s friend

David: Father / Customer B Willie: Boss------------------SCENE I Father and Mother are at home.Gwen just gets home.Gwen: I’m home, Mom, Dad.Mom: How’s your day, Gwen?

Gwen: Not bad.I’m tired of taking buses to school every day.Father: Why? Gwen: The bus is so crowded every morning.Mom: I don’t understand.What’s your point? Gwen: I want to buy a motorcycle-a Harley.Father: What！Harley!Are you insane? Mom:(to father)Calm down.(to Gwen)I understand your situation.I would agree if you want to buy a normal motorcycle, but Harley!Forget it.Gwen: But I want it so much.I’ve always wanted one.Father: OK.I can contribute some for the motorcycle, but you have to pay the rest yourself.Mom: I agree with your dad.Gwen: Oh!Yes!Are you sure? But I don’t have any money to pay for it!Father: You can use your New Years’ Red Envelope money or find a part-time job.Gwen: Hey, it sounds like a great idea to get a part-time job.Mom: You have to keep your eyes open when you look for a part-time job.Gwen: Don’t worry.I’ll be careful.Father: I can give you some advice and experience.When I was a teenager, I used to work as a porter.It was very tough, but I learned how to be responsible and how to use time.So will you.(change of tone)I remember I almost lost my life one day.Gwen: Thanks, Dad.I think I can handle it.I’ll be careful.SCENE II Gwen: Ivy, I want to find a part-time job.Are you interested in getting one for yourself, too? Ivy: It sounds great!I can search on the Internet for job opportunities.Gwen: Then I can look at the ads in the newspaper.(After 2 to 3 minutes)Gwen: Look!Here’s something interesting.It looks good.Ivy: Let me see...let’s make a phone call to see what the job is about.(Phone rings.Gwen and Ivy are calling the “I Need You” Company.)Boss: This is “I Need You” company!May I help you?

Ivy: I need a part-time job, and I saw your ads in the newspaper, so „ Boss: I see!Could you come to our company this Wednesday afternoon? Ivy: What? Boss: Oh!We’d like to interview you personally.Ivy: Is it alright if my friend comes along? Boss: No problem.You and your friend can come together.Ivy: Thank you.Bye.Boss: You’re welcome.See you!(hangs up.)Gwen: What did he say? Ivy: He said we can have interviews this Wednesday afternoon.Gwen: Great!Let’s do it.We can meet there.Ivy: I’m a little bit nervous.Gwen: It’ll be fine.Don’t worry.SCENE III(Wednesday afternoon, Gwen and Ivy are at the “I Need You” Company.They enter the company.)Boss: Hi, nice to meet you!Have a seat!Take it easy.O.K.!First, do you have any work experience? Gwen: No.Ivy: Me, either.Boss: That’s O.K.You’re just what our company needs.You can learn on the job.Second, do you have any talents? Like dancing or singing? Ivy: Well„.Gwen: I love singing.My friend says I sing well.Boss: Very good!Ivy: May I ask what this job is about? What do you want us to do? Boss: It’s easy.You just need to sing and chat with customers.They might give you some extra tips if they like you.Gwen: Oh!It sounds great!I can get a lot of money!I’ll take this job!What do you think, Ivy? Ivy: Umm...but I’m not good at singing or dancing.Boss: It’s O.K.!Fanny„ Fanny: Yes.Boss: She can teach you how to do this job well.It’s not hard.Gwen: How about the salary? Boss: Ha, ha!As to the salary, I won’t disappoint you.I promise you’ll be a rich girl in a few days.(shows a cunning smile)Ivy: I don’t think I can do it.It sounds fishy to me.I think we should ask more about what exactly we have to do.Gwen: Come on!Take it easy.It’s a good opportunity.We’ll make a lot of money.Just think about the money!Ivy: No, I’m sorry.I guess the job is not for me.Gwen: All right!Suit yourself.Ivy: Good luck.Bye.(exits)Fanny: Hi.Hmm„(looks at Gwen from head to toes)I think I’ll change the way you look, O.K.?(She starts to change Gwen’s hair style and her clothes and shoes;she also puts make-up on Gwen)

SCENE IV(Gwen’s first day of work at a bar)

Customer A: Wow, Fanny!Look at that girl!What a cute girl!Customer B: I’ve never seen her before.Who is she? Fanny: This is Gwen.It’s her first day here.Gwen: Hi.(She appears shy and uneasy.)Customer A: Come sit beside me.Customer B: Dance with me.(They both drag Gwen’ arms.)

Gwen: Umm„ What’s this all about? What’s going on?(Gwen starts to cry and turns to run away.)Fanny: Wait, wait!Stop it!Come back!Hey, what are you doing? Gwen: That man touched my butt.Fanny: So what? It’s no big deal.Take it easy.No matter what they do to you, you should always show respect to them and obey them.Gwen:(Sobs)Oh!The job is so different from what I have thought.I can’t do it!I can’t stand it!I want to quit!

SCENE V At Gwen’s home

Gwen: I can’t believe this.Darn!How stupid I was.It‘s disgusting.(Gwen’s still crying.)Mom: What’s wrong with you, honey?

Gwen: It’s terrible.I don’t know how to tell you.Father: What’s the problem? Tell us.Gwen: I got a part-time job the other day.And today was my first day of work.I thought they just want me to be a performer, singing some songs and dancing for other people.But the customers there harassed me.They were evil.They touched me and it made me feel awful.I couldn’t do it, so I ran away.Mom: What? Why did you choose this kind of jobs? Are you blind? Are you that stupid? Father: Calm down, both of you!You have to remember this experience.You should be careful when you choose a job.Didn’t I tell you that?

Mom: If you have troubles finding a job, we’ll help you look for one from the Internet or newspapers.Father: It’s O.K.now.Stop it.Gwen: Thank you so much, Mom and Dad.I love you.Mom: We love you, too, honey.J

别摸我英语话剧剧本

Don't Touch Me!Vicky和Lisa是某餐馆的服务员，一天，一个顾客对Vicky....人物 Allen Jim Kuki Fenix Vicky Lisa------------------Cast 1.Vicky︰a waitress at Monday’s restaurant.She is a hard working girl.2.Lisa︰another waitress at Monday’s restaurant.She is a kind and naive girl.3.Fenix︰one of customers.He’s a very ill-natured customer.4.Allen and Tim︰customers at Monday’s restaurant.They’re good and decent men.5.Kuki︰the boss of the restaurant.Scene I(One afternoon, there are many customers at the Monday’s restaurant.)Vicky and Lisa talk and go to the kitchen, and then the boss, kuki, comes in, too.Kuki: Hey, there are many customers today.Girls, work hard.Remember, God gives all things to industry.Lisa: Yeah.I know.Vicky: We will do our best.The door opens now.Two men come in.Kuki moves to the door.Kuki: May I help you, sir? Two people? Come with me, I will take you to the table.Allen: Yes, pleases.Tim: I’m starving.I hope I can eat the best food in this restaurant right now.Kuki:(laughing)Just a moment.Two men walk in the restaurant.Lisa walks toward them.Vicky: This is the menu, sirs.Allen＆Tim: Thank you.After a few minutes.Lisa and Vicky walk to the kitchen.Lisa: Hey, Vicky.I don’t like that customer.See, that man sits near the door.Vicky: Why? Does he make any troubles for you? Lisa: I don’t know.I feel„„.Oh, I just don’t like the way he looks at me.Scene II Vicky delivers a dish to the table where Allen and Tim sit.Vicky:(talks to herself)Lisa is right.The way that man looks at me makes me uncomfortable.Vicky delivers a dish again to Fenix’s table.Vicky: Here is your meal, sir.Enjoy it, please.Vicky turns to the kitchen.At this moment, Fenix touches her back!Vicky: Wow~~~~(she screams.)Kuki:(runs to Vicky)what happened? Vicky: He, he„„He touched me!Fenix: No！I didn’t.Lisa: You lie！I see you did that.What I say is an absolute truth.Other customers gather around them to see what is happening.Kuki: Well, seeing is believing, sir„„

Fenix: I feel humiliated.So, boss.You must solve this problem.Look at your Waitress.They are such tricky women.Kuki: But, they say you did it„„„.Sir, I think„„.Fenix: What? You mean I am a pervert? Oh„„„Is this the way you serve your customers? You must give me an explanation today!Maybe giving me some money will make me forget it.Lisa: You are a shameless cheater, liar.The argument continues.Scene III Allen and Tim are angry for what they saw.Allen: I won’t tolerate your behavior anymore.Tim: That’s right.Come on, sir.It’s your fault.We all know that.Fenix: Hmn? You think so? But I don’t think so.I mean, if the boss and the waitresses make an apology to me, I might leave early.Or I will stay and make sure that no other customers walk inside the restaurant.Kuki: Oh„„Don’t do that, please.Sir, you have to know it won’t do you any good.Fenix: Yeah„„it won’t do me any good unless you pay me some money for the humiliation you have caused me.You have disgraced me.Tim: Such a liar, I can’t believe it！Fenix: Mind your own business.Allen:(Takes out his badge.)See.Fenix: Uh„„

Allen: I’m a police officer.Maybe you know what I’ll do with you.Fenix turns to the door quickly.Everybody in the restaurant all claps and cheers for Allen.Lisa: There is very few good people in our society.Many bad people bully the weak and fear the strong.Tim: Yeah„„.but trust me, justice will win.Kuki: We are so lucky you are here.Thank you very much.Allen: You are welcome.It’s just my duty.臭脚的故事》英语话剧剧本

A Story about Love and Stinky Feet 超级搞笑，哈哈哈 从前，一个巫婆有一双臭脚，人们都很讨厌。所以，她想找一个人换掉她的双脚。有一天她来到”香国"。她发现，人人都有双香脚。一天王子午睡，巫婆用自己的臭脚换了王子的香脚。

有一位公主，她总是失眠。虽然国王和王后在尝试了很多方法，她还不能睡觉。国王和王后陛下非常担心自己的女儿。

最后，他们就发现了一个方法：每当公主无法入睡，她只需要嗅觉王子的臭脚，然后她将睡得很好。

最后王子和公主很幸福的生活在一起。人物

Ada: Little girl Candy: Queen Evander: King Evelyn Joel: Prince Rita: Singer /Woman Yilina: Witch------------------

Summary Once upon a time„A witch had a pair of stinky feet.They were very disgusting.So, she wanted to find a person to change her feet.And one day she flied to “Fragrance Country”.She found everyone there had a pair of fragrant feet.And the prince had the most fragrant pair of feet.The prince took a nap and snored under the tree.At that time, the witch exchanged her own stinky feet with the prince’s fragrant feet.There was a princess who couldn’t sleep in “Beauty Country”.Although the king and the queen tried many methods, she still couldn’t sleep.The king and the queen were very worried about their daughter.And then, they discovered a perfect method for the princess to fall asleep: Whenever the princess couldn’t sleep, she only had to smell the prince’s stinky feet, and then she would sleep very well.In the end, the prince and the princess lived happily together.SCENE I(One afternoon, a girl, Ada, is reading a book)Ada: Oh~ what an interesting story!Once upon a time„A witch had a pair of stinky feet.They smelt worse than stinky tofu.They were very disgusting.So, she wanted to find a person to change her feet.Ada: And one day she flied to “Fragrance country”.She found everyone there had a pair of fragrant feet.And the prince had the most fragrant pair of feet.The prince took a nap and snored under the tree.Witch:（screaming and laughing and dancing）I’m the most perfect witch who has both beauty and intelligence.More and more people fall for my„my „ feet!Oh no, my feet!I’m such a charming witch, but why do my feet stink so much? Everyone faints when they smell my feet.The smell of my feet can kill mice.Oh, I don’t want to live.I want to fly away!（Flying to the Fragrance country）

Witch:(Crying)I hate my feet!I hate my feet!(in a low voice)Ha-ha, what’s the smell? It smells so sweet.(Searching)Oh.What a handsome boy.(Come closer and take a deep breath)Oh, oh, oh, why do his feet have such a sweet smell? It’s just not fair!(Angrily)Not fair!Look, he’s sleeping and snoring.Let me exchange my feet with his!(Doing magic and laughing loudly)Oh, my feet.You smell so sweet!Now I’m really the most charming witch.(Fly away)Prince:(Asleep and dreaming)Oh!What a beautiful girl you are!You are my only one – my dear princess.Prince:(Wake up!)Oh~ what’s wrong? What a bad smell！The room smells of stinky tofu.Is it my table? My hand? My chair? My head? Or my window? Oh no!It’s my feet.I have a pair of stinky feet.How did it happen?(Hold on to his head.)(Run away)I can’t believe it!

SCENE II(The prince is walking and sees some crows on the way.)Prince: Oh~ there are many crows.Crow A: Please go away„

Crow B: Quickly!It’s full of bad smell here.Crows: We are going to die, because your feet are too disgusting.Prince: Oh!I am so sorry„My feet cause you much trouble„Sorry~!(Prince continues to walk.He sees some flowers.)Prince: Hum~ I like the perfume of flowers.Flower A: Oh!I can’t live without fresh air.Flower B: Keep your feet far away from us, please.Flowers: Your feet are too disgusting.Prince: Why does everyone dislike me? I am so sad and I am sorry for making you feel bad.(Prince continues to walk.)Prince: What can I do? I want my sweet-smelling feet back.(Many strangers are buying from vendors on the road.)Stranger A: Did you step in something? Check your shoes.Stranger B: Oh!Don’t talk nonsense.Stranger C: I know where that bad smell comes from.It’s him./span> Prince: I can’t believe it!My disgusting feet have magic power！Queen: Oh!Don’t say that!They are not disgusting at all.Congratulations!You are going to marry my dear daughter.King: Yes!This is a happy ending.Ada: Whenever the princess couldn’t sleep, all she had to do was to smell the prince’s stinky feet.And then, she would sleep very well.In the end, the prince and the princess lived happily together.

第二篇：幽默短剧剧本

幽默短剧剧本

一天，老师走进课堂，学生们一齐起立喊：“老师早上好！”

老师愤愤地说：“只叫早上好？那我下午呢？难道就不好了吗？”

于是学生们又一齐喊：“老师下午好！”

老师又愤愤地说：“那我晚上呢？”

学生们又一齐喊：“老师晚上也好！”

老师点点头说道：“这样才行，现在重新喊一遍！”

学生们一齐喊：“老师早上好，下午好，晚上也好！”

老师说道：“坐下！今天我们要复习反义词，我们这样练习，我说一句，你们大声说出反义词。现在开始。”

老师：“今天天气很好。”

学生：“今天天气很坏。”

老师：“到处阳光明媚。”

学生：“到处阴云密布。”

老师：“马路上人山人海。” 学生：“马路上空无一人。”

老师：“年轻。”

学生：“年老。”

老师：“站立。”

学生：“躺倒”

老师：“有个年轻人站立在路上。”

学生：“有个年老人躺倒在路上。”

老师：“我捡到一元钱。”

学生：“我丢了一元钱。”

老师：“我捡到一元钱，交给老师。”

学生：“我丢了一元钱，去偷老师。”

老师：“错误，不能这样说！”

学生：“正确，应该这样说！”

老师：“错误。” 学生：“正确。”

老师：“这不行，这是违法行为！”

学生：“这可以，这是合法行为！” 老师：“我说错误。”

学生：“我们说正确。”

老师：“听老师的，老师说的才是正确！”

学生：“听我们的，老师说的都是错误！” 老师：“你们愚蠢。”

学生：“我们聪明。” 老师：“停止！” 学生：“继续！”

老师：“你们现在停止！别说了！” 学生：“我们现在继续！还要说！” 老师：“你们这些蠢猪，我说停止！” 学生：“我们都是天才，我们说继续！” 老师：“你们听老师的！” 学生：“老师听我们的！” 老师：“学生都得听老师的！” 学生：“老师都得听学生的！” 老师：“现在你们停止练习！”

学生：“现在我们继续练习！” 老师：“你们没完没了了吗？”

学生：“我们有始有终的呀！”

老师：“那你们就停止！蠢猪！”

学生：“那我们该继续！天才！”

....之后老师怒气冲冲地抱着书本走出了教室

丐世无双

时间：不明 地点：某条繁华的大街上 人物：洪七公（H)，乔峰（Q)，跑龙套一人（P)大体事件：两个乞丐在街上偶遇后的一段时间里发生的故事。（出场，手拿饭缸）

H：改革春风吹满地，做个乞丐不容易，低三下四还受气，还有城管来突击！哎，这年头，做个乞丐比大学生找工作还还难呐，这不，刚才城管那帮人又来突击了吗，说我们这些人除了影响市容在也没有别的作用了，小样地，要是我们都没了，你们城管的不都也下岗了吗？再说了，城关的要真把我们带走也行，进去了是既遮风又避雨，还能免费住宿，要吃有吃，要喝有喝，一群人还能在一起唠唠嗑，简直就是我们向往的神仙般的生活。他们可倒好，不仅要没收我的口粮，还要拿走我的饭缸，抢走我辛苦要来的血汗钱，还要赶出我的地盘！要不是逃跑拼了命，肯定是赔了夫人又折兵！总算跑出了他们的搜索范围，先在这歇一会吧，哎，我就在这守缸待钱！（出场，手拿饭缸）

Q：南来的北往的，东跑的西颠的，哥哥姐姐叔叔阿姨好心人可怜一下吧，我家穷人丑，一无所有，穿衣服没袖，取暖靠抖，成天药不离口，这辈子没吃过猪肉。人比筷子瘦，生活过得不如狗。可怜可怜我吧！（一脚踢到了 H的饭缸）

H：哎，你怎么回事呀，你看看，你把我这精致的饭缸给踢掉漆了，你的赔我！

Q：你当你那破饭缸是宝马还是奔驰阿，掉一块漆就要赔偿，你去保险公司要赔偿去吧！H：看你是个穷叫花子，我也不难为你了，你就把你的饭缸再加上那里面的钱给我就行了！Q：看你说的，你瞧你那幅德行吧，咱俩好象是同行吧！我在这条街混迹好几年了，咋从来没见过你呢？你是不是新新新新来的阿？(H转过身，自言自语）

H：难道他是这条街的当家的？我得考考他（转过身）山珍海味萝卜白菜！Q：领导大款学生乞丐！

H：哎呀，大水冲了龙王庙，一家人不认一家人阿。失礼了，给，这是我的片子（掏出名片）Q：不知者无罪，我也有（互换名片）

H：灯红区酒绿街丐帮六十七分舵副总舵主--乔峰，哎呀，久仰久仰！Q：花前区月下街丐帮三十八分舵副总舵主--洪七公，幸惠幸惠！H：来来来，坐

Q：兄弟，你不在你那好好待着怎么跑到我这来了？

H：还不是城管那帮人吗，又来突击大检查，不得已才跑到这来了，你这一上午收入咋样阿？ Q：哎，别提了，一上午才要到这么点，这年头，当乞丐--难！当一个乞丐头目--难1 H：当一个满街乱跑的乞丐头目--难！H&Q：哎

(P上场，手拿蒙牛随变，把包装扔到饭缸里，下场）H：哈，他把你饭缸当垃圾桶了阿！(Q拿过包装添了一口）H：哎，给我留一口阿！

Q：好吃！好几天没开荤了！爽！H：一口全让你吃了，啥滋味阿？ Q：酸酸甜甜就是我！

H：你看现在这包装，多漂亮，你看这俊男靓女，这男的多俊阿！Q：你说你咋这么孤陋寡闻呢，人家这是俩女的，你不认识阿？人家是去年最火的超级女生--何洁和李宇春！

H：我管他什么超级男生超级女生呢，这包装我留下了阿，有奖的，说不定中个500万什么的，这辈子就不用当乞丐了

Q：行，等你中奖了，中了两头奶牛，你就天天喝牛奶吧，洗澡你都用牛奶！（P上场，手拿传单，把一大把传单扔到饭缸中，下场）

H：这小伙挺实惠阿，真会偷懒，他到省事了，这搞传销的都这么狡猾阿？！Q：这么没文化呢，那叫发传单，什么传销！H：阿，发传单销售，简称传销嘛！Q：我看看他们这是卖什么呢 H：你认识字吗？这都拿反了！

Q：我怎么不认识字，我小学就过六级了！H：就你？

Q：拼音六级嘛！不是和你吹，我小学念了八年 H：哟，保送研究生了阿？

Q：看看，耐克阿迪大降价，短裤仅卖二百八！仅卖280阿，一条裤衩够我吃三个月的饭了！H：你看你这消费观念就不行了吧，人家那是名牌，尤其现在的那些大学生，不管日子过得多辛酸，也要把那名牌穿！Q：xx鞋店疯狂大促销，买一送二！H：对，买一双鞋送你两根鞋带！

Q：上名牌家教中介中心，为你提供各科家教，保您的孩子考上名牌大学！

H：你还不知道现在的家教吗？全是大学生，是上课什么也不教，就是和你把磕唠，费用一分也不少，孩子成绩是没提高 Q：不看了，全是虚假广告

H：哎，你说咱们要是也去发传单怎么样，一天也不少挣

Q：你可拉倒吧，就你那形象吧，人家见你躲还来不及呢，哪敢接你的传单阿？

H：我不会包装一下自己嘛，人家都说我长得像周润发，其实我像刘德华。再说是在不行咱就把传单发给咱们的弟兄呗 Q：你可别在那做梦了，这是白天没准到时候挣得还没现在多呢，就像传单上那些作虚假广告的，没准那天就倒闭了，到时候没准成咱们小弟了(P上场，在饭缸里扔一枚硬币，下场）H：thank you very much!Q：哟，你咋说上鸟语了阿？

H：你没看见刚才那个人呀，黄头发，准是个外国人，没准扔进去的是欧元呢！我可不能给咱们中国乞丐丢脸，得表示感谢阿！

Q：那可不一定，现在这年轻人赶时髦，染个头发多正常阿，那一阵我在xx大学门口蹲点，就看见一个女的，今天是红头发，明天是黄头发，后天是紫头发，从周一到周日，赤橙黄绿清兰紫让他染了个遍，最后弄的那头发和拖布似的 H：不管了，让我看看欧圆张什么样（H从饭缸里拿出硬币，看一眼，扔掉）Q：咋啦？你咋把欧元扔了？让别人捡去咋整？

H：那小子也不厚道阿，拿一个一毛的硬币来糊弄我，那是打发要饭的呢？！现在一毛钱还拿得出手？在怎么的也得给5毛阿

（P上场，拿五块钱纸币，扔到饭缸里，拿出四个硬币）P：哎，兄弟，不好意思，坐公交车没零钱了，换点！（下场）H：他能不能拿假币来骗咱们阿？（把钱拿起来，对着灯照照）Q：那咱们咒他，他要是拿假币骗咱们，就让他出车祸 H：对，撞他个生活不能自理（P手拿报纸上场）

P：法制报，故事报，新出版的体育报，来看看一个二十三岁的青年为何连续六次参加高考，新入学的大学生为何把楼跳，大学食堂饭里出现假耗子药，名校研究生为何残忍虐待二十八只小猫，看一看全知道！看报看报，大学自习室吸烟为何屡禁不止，一场血案起因只是一把格尺，要想深入学习八荣八耻，快来买我的报纸 Q：给我来一份(接过报纸）H：你还看报？

Q：那是啊，得看清现在的社会形势，关心国家大事（掏出一副眼镜）H：设备挺齐全阿

Q：那是啊，这眼镜是那天瞎猫眼镜店清仓时买的，五块钱，当时老板说了，就五块钱，多了少了都不卖，我当时拿出十块钱，老板说，拿零的，我没零钱找你，我说就十块了，要不你都拿去，老板当时就急了，说，我多要你五块钱算啥阿？这事要传出去，说我多收了乞丐五块钱，叫我以后怎么做人？ H：后来呢？

Q：后来我给了他五十个一毛的硬币

H：你们两都挺很，来，给我一张看看，我要文体板块的（H掏出一个放大镜）

Q：你别对着太阳看呀，一会烧着了！看看头版头条，全国各地深入学习八荣八耻，树立社会主义荣辱观。哎，咱们也该好好学学了，咱们这成天游手好闲，靠别人救济吃饭，已经成了八耻之一了阿！

H：我看中国足球更应该学学，你看，赵本山心灰意冷，说不想再趟这块混水。你看他们一个个钱挣得比咱们多，可脚比咱两的臭多了 Q：可不是嘛，哎，这咋下雨了呢？ H：太好了，我好几个月没洗澡了！（Q的手机响）

Q：喂？喂！喂！喂？啊，什么，大点声，哦，城管的来了？啊？喂？喂？喂！----小灵通，信号不好，下面弟兄说，城管的过来了，咱两快躲一躲吧

H：行，收拾一下，赶紧走（H手机响）喂？我早知道，城管要来，是吧？你怎么看的阿？消息这么慢，今天晚上没你饭吃了！咱们快走吧

相声《我的儿子》

牛群 冯巩

文本：

牛：冯巩。

冯：哎。

牛：跟你打听个事。

冯：你说吧。

牛：喜欢钱吗？

冯：什么钱？

牛：装糊涂，是不是？人民币！

冯：哦，就花的那钱。

牛：啪！给你这放上一摞钱，动心不动心。

冯：白给我？

牛：就问你，动心不动心？说实话。

冯：你小看我冯巩了，我冯巩是搞艺术的，真正的艺术是无价的。你一落钱就想...一落钱就想...那得看多少钱是吧。

牛：你今天是不是给我儿子压岁钱了？

冯：不是，这不过年了吗，我就领你们儿子挨屋这么一转，你们儿子嘴甜，叔叔阿姨不停的叫，人家就...这叫勤劳致富懂吗。

牛：哦，这么说，你一共给我儿子敛了多少钱？

冯：六百。

牛：多少钱？

冯：六百...牛：我怎么从他兜里就翻出五百呀？

冯：那一百块钱我不是留下了吗...不是，是我借的，我就怕别人管我叫叔叔时我没钱，你知道吗。

牛：我的孩子多小，你这不是害我儿子呢吗。你给他钱越多...当然最可气的是姜昆。

冯：他给多少？

牛：一分钱没给。其实呀，你别管给孩子花多少钱，只要花在孩子学习上。

冯：花多少钱我们都乐意。

牛：你看那天日子，我把我儿子就到跟前。

冯：哦。

牛：我说儿子过来，你只要考上区重点中学，你不是喜欢望远镜吗？爸爸给你买一个高倍的望远镜。

冯：英雄所见略同。

牛：是不是。

冯：儿子，只要你考上市重点，只要比牛群大大那儿子高一个层次。我就给你买一个游戏机。

牛：转天我儿子给我一个表。

冯：我也接到一张纸。

牛：我这么一看合同书，甲方牛群。乙方牛小群。如果乙方给甲方考入区重点中学，甲方应给乙方买高倍望远镜一个，折合人民币一千元整。以次类推，如考上市重点两千元，考上全国重点三千元，少年科技大五千元。为尽事宜双方本着友好协商的态度解决，空口无凭，签字画押。

冯：我们儿子写的就更绝了！特别强调，如甲方违约，须立即向乙方赔偿，精神损失费、心灵伤害费，八百元整，如付美金，按当日牌价，括弧不要卢布。签约人甲方冯巩，乙方冯小巩。公证人，冯老巩。连他爷爷都上来了。

牛：那天我无意当中从我儿子的抽屉当中翻出一价目表来。

冯：我也从他枕头底下那出一小纸条。

牛：上面写着，帮妈妈刷碗三毛。

冯：给爸爸拿报纸五毛。

牛：陪奶奶看动画片，让奶奶高兴，九毛二。

冯：骑着爷爷满屋子转，让爷爷锻炼身体，一块四毛九。

牛：你着算帐算到我们头上了？

冯：要算帐先跟你们算算帐。

牛：过来过来过来。你听着，要这么说，妈妈生你...多少钱？

冯：为生你，你妈妈落了一身病...多少钱？

牛：为了让你喝上鲜奶，爸爸在楼道里养了两只羊，多热的天熏的街坊四邻都捂着大口罩...多少钱？

冯：你欺负比你小的孩子，就为了让你消气，你爸爸狠狠的批评了那孩子他妈，等那孩子他爸回来，堵着咱家门，骂了三天街，你爸都不敢出门...多少钱？

牛：我老想我小时侯没钱，我不能让你受委屈。

冯：我们赶上十年浩劫了，不能让你没知识呀。

牛：为了让你有知识，花多少钱爸爸没犹豫过。

冯：是呀，怎么花钱越多，你怎么约没出息呢你呀？

牛：就这么一说，我那儿子眼泪刷就下来了。

冯：我们孩子也是泣不成声。

牛：爸爸，我以后一定好好学习。

冯：爸爸，我一定为您争气。

牛：我一定考全校第一。

冯：我一定考全区第一。

牛：我一定考全市第一。

冯：我一定考全国第一。

牛：到那时候爸爸给我多少钱？

冯：爸爸，我再也不要钱了，你给我弄个存折吧。

第三篇：英语短剧剧本

英语短剧剧本 三只小猪修房子

人物：主持人、老狼、三只小猪

地点：野外 主持人：

Long long ago, there lived three little pigs and a wolf in the forest.(很久很久以前，森林里住着三只小猪和一只狼。)

Look!The three little pigs are coming.(瞧，三只小猪来啦！)小猪一： What are you doing.brothers?(你们在干嘛呢，哥哥们？)小猪二：

I’m building a house with leaves.(我在用叶子做房子呢)小猪三：

I’m building a house with sticks.(我在用木棍做房子呢)小猪一：

But leaves and sticks are not strong.(但是，叶子和木

棍一点也不坚固呀。)小猪二：

What are you doing ,little brother?(那你在做什么呢，小弟弟？)小猪一：

I’m building a house with sticks。（我用砖头做房子呢。）小猪二：

Bricks？ That’s very difficult!（砖头？ 那很困难啊！）小猪一：

I know, but sticks are very strong and safe!

(我知道，但是砖头很结实！)

主持人：

Oh… wolf is coming.Be careful, three little pigs(喔

…狼来了，小心点儿，三只小猪。)狼：

Little pigs ,little pigs open your door!(小猪小猪快

开门。)小猪二和三一起说：NO NO NO go away！（不不不，你走开！）

狼：吹

主持人： But leaves and sticks are not strong.（但是树叶和木棍

一点也不结实。）

The wolf blows down the house.(狼把房子吹倒了)

He eats the pigs（他把2只小猪吃了）

狼：

Little pigs ,little pigs open your door!(小猪小猪快

开门。)小猪一：NO NO NO go away！（不不不，你走开！）

狼：

吹

主持人：The wolf blows and blows.(狼吹了又吹)

But bricks are very strong(但是砖头做的房子非常坚

固。)

The wolf go away.(所以老狼灰溜溜的走了。)

所以人： Thank you!

第四篇：剧本-英语短剧

灰姑娘的百万英镑

Betty-灰姑娘Sally-富翁姐Tom-富翁弟Penny-衣店老板Jimmy-衣店小二Jason-白马王子Jessica-后妈Susan-后姐William-后哥Bobby-歌星 James-主持人Robin-酒店服务员Julia-服务员 Angel-服务员 Vicky-有钱人

第一幕（Betty在认真扫地，Susan比划衣服，William高兴地吃东西）

Susan：Bobby will hold a concert the day after tomorrow, I’m so excited.William: Oh,he is a real superstar,I want to go there.Betty: I want to go too.Susan:You?Look at yourself,so dirty and so ugly.Jessica:Clean the room and cook for us,you have many things to do.so if you want to go,finish your work.第二幕（Tom and Sally正在享受按摩）

Sally: life is so boring.Tom:I agree with you,Life is so boring.Sally:Let’s have a bet.Tom:Bet on?

Sally:Ok, we will give a poor person a million pound and I think everyone will like him because of his money,he will live a happy life.Tom: Sally,I don’t think so.Money is not everything, we can live a happy lives without money,we have love.Sally: Sure,Let’s go and find the person,Er..who will be the luck dog.第三幕（Betty做完工作，正试着衣服）

William：Susan, look at Betty,her dress is so beautiful.Susan:Mom,mom.I like her dress(抢衣服)

Betty：No，that’s my dress.It’s my father bought for me.Jessica: It’s doesn’t matter,Susan.(转脸对Betty)，you are our servant.Get out!and clean the garden,pick up all the leaves.第四幕（Betty委屈的拣树叶，看着William等离开，Tom和Sally在花园外看到Betty）Sally：oh，Young lady.would you please come here a moment?

Betty:Who? me?

Tom:Yes, you.Betty: What can I do for you?

Tom: I wonder, young lady.if you’d mind us asking a few questions?

Betty: Certainly.Sally: What’s your name? why don’t you join the concert?

Betty: My name is Betty.I can’t go, because I must do housework at home, and I have no money to buy the ticket.Sally: Tom, give her the letter.Betty: For me?

Tom: For you.Oh no, you mustn’t open it now.you may open it 30 minutes later.Betty: Why?

Sally: There’s money in it.Betty: Thank you!But I can’t receive it.Tom: We appreciate your honesty, young lady.That’s why We give you the letter.Sally: Betty ,30 minutes later, promise?

Betty: Promise!

Sally: Let’s go, Tom.(30 minutes Betty打开信封)

Betty：Oh my god!

第五幕（衣店，Betty进店，Jimmy 上）

Jimmy：What can I do for you?

Betty: Can you show me some dresses?

Penny 上下打量Betty，指示Jimmy带到地下室

Jimmy：This way!

Betty: Thank you

Jimmy: These dresses are fashionable.They are new style in this summer.Penny: Jimmy, serve her quickly and get her out of the side door.Jimmy:Yes, madam。

Betty: l like this one, l willwear it, er……..l don’t want to pay now.If you don’t mind , l’d like to open an account andsettlewithyou in three day, you see l haven’t any small change.Jimmy: Here we go,l suppose a beautiful young lady like you can only carry large change.Betty: l just don’t want to embarrass you with a large note.Jimmy: what makes you think we can’t change a large note? As a matter of fact, we can!Betty: In that case, there’s no problem!

(Jimmy拿着钱惊呆，一句话也说不出来)

Penny: What ' s up? What ' s the trouble What ' s wanting?

Betty: I am waiting for my change.Penny: Come, come, get her her change Jimmy, let her going.Jimmy: Change?

Penny: Change!

Jimmy: Could it..., is it easy...?(把钱递给Penny)

Penny: Oh my lady GaGa.Jimmy, you are a fool.(转脸对Betty)take off this dress, and follow me, pick the best in.This way please.Look at this one, and this one.They are fit for you.Betty: I come here for only one dress.Penny: you need these all seasons.Betty: Oh, I can ' t give you all these orders.Or you have to wait indefinitely for payment.Penny: Indefinitely, a weak word.Eternally, Lady.Betty: Thank you.(Betty穿上了漂亮的裙子，去演唱会)

第六幕（演唱会，Fans尖叫Bobby I love you）

James: Ok let’s welcome our superstar, Bobby!

女保镖上，Bobby戴墨镜走上舞台，唱Michael Jackson的歌，众人欢呼，Bobby和Susan握手，Susan晕，被拖下。Bobby 继续握手。

这时Jessica看到Betty

Jessica: Are you Betty?(自言自语)What happened to her? Look at her dress, It’s beautiful.Fans: She is a millionaire in the newspaper.Jessica: Dear god!Forgive me.(转脸对Betty)Let’s go home together, my daughter.Do you want

to drink or eat something, I’ll buy some for you.Wait for me a moment.(William和Susan看到Jessica对Betty好，很不高兴)

William: Don’t go home with us.Susan: I hate you forever.（准备推到Betty）

Jason出现、阻止，一起走出演唱会

Betty: Thank you

Jason: It’s my pleasure.Would you mind to answering me a few question?

Betty: Yes.Jason: Who are they? Why do they want to hurt you?

Betty: Oh they are the children of my stepmother.They don’t like me.And I can’t go home.Jason: You should find a hotel now.Let’s go.(找到酒店，Betty和Jason道别)

Betty: Thanks for helping me

Jason: You are welcome, goodnight

Betty: Goodnight

第七幕（酒店内）

Robin: who live in NO.300 room

Angel：Miss Mu

Robin: I’ll move her up.Robin: prepare the suite immediately, send up fresh flower-rose.I want you to pay attention to what I have to say.Go back to the door and look out for that girl-the millionaire.Angel: Yes, sir.Robin: Excuse me, Miss Mu, you have to move up this room, the room is occupied by a millionaire.Vicky: This is where I am, and this is where I stay.What’s the meaning of this? Get out, all of you.Robin: You must move, and I assure you, It’s temporary.Vicky: Who will come here?

Robin: A young lady-Betty, she is a millionaire.Vicky: I won’t stand for it.This country is going to the dogs.(Betty进酒店)

Robin: Good evening, lady, and welcome.We are honored that you can be here.We can show you all your comforts.Julia: Allow me, this way

(Vicky 很生气，于是她想了一个办法)

Vicky: Everybody likes Betty why? she only has a million pound note,yes, Because of her money, HaHa……(自言自语)

Vicky: Julia, can you do me a favor?

Julia: Of course, madam.Vicky: Go to the No.300 room, and find the million pound note, then hide it, next tell the reportor that Betty is a liar.Julia: Yes Madam.（消息很快传开）

Robin：Really？Really？Really？Really？Ok，move her out right now.Jimmy&Penny: she is not a millionaire.(把送的衣服全抢回来)，she is a real liar.(一起说Liar，Liar，Pants on fire)

(Jason出现)

Jason: What is wrong with you?

Betty: I can’t find the million pound note.Jason: Is money important in your life?

Betty: No.listen to me, The million pound note doesn’t belong to me.Jason: Are you kidding?

Betty: It’s not a joke, It’s ture.I’m not rich.I have not money, I’m not a millionaire.Jason: Betty, I don’t care whether you’re rich or poor.Betty: you’re wonderful.Angel: Betty, The million pound note is under the carpet in the hall.Betty: Thank you!

Betty: I’ll take the note back to that two kind-hearted people tomorrow.最后一幕

Betty: Thank you, but I don’t need so much money, I can live a happy live without money.Tom: Sally, I win the bet, I told you before that note can do anything.Jason: May I say something?

Tom&Sally: Jason? My dear son&nephew.Jason: I agree that the note is extremely powerful but It is quite ture to say that it can do anything.You see I love Betty because she is Betty, not a millionaire.Sally: Come, come, Jason.But for the note you’d never have met.Tom: How do you know? They might have been fated to meet.完（金钱不是万能的，不要因为它忽略你身边的爱）

第五篇：英语短剧剧本

Little Red Riding Hood 小红帽

第一场：Little Red Riding Hood家

Mum：

(妈妈拿着一个篮子，把桌紫的水果放在篮子里）

Little Red Riding Hood:(唱着歌，欢快地跑进来）Hi,mummy，what are you doing?

Mum：（一边把水果放在篮子里，心事重重地说）Grandma is ill.Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma.Take them to Grandma.Little Red Riding Hood：（边提起篮子，边点头说）Ok!

Mum：（亲切地看着Little Red Riding Hood说）Be good.Be careful.Little Red Riding Hood： Yes ,mummy．Goodbye, mummy.Mum：

Bye-bye.Darling.第二场：在路上

(一阵轻快的音乐远而近，Little Red Riding Hood挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁)

Little Red Riding Hood： Wow！Flowers, how beautiful!（放下篮子采花）One flower ,two flowers, three flowers.Wolf：（随着一阵低沉的音乐，Wolf大步地走上台）I am wolf.I am hungry.(做找东西状,东张西望)Here is a little red riding hood.Hi!Little Red Riding Hood.Where are you going?(做狡猾的样子和Little Red Riding Hood打招呼)

Little Red Riding Hood：(手摸辫子，天真地回答)To Grandma’s．Grandma is ill.Wolf：（自言自语）I' ll eat Grandma.But……（对Little Red Riding Hood说）Hey, look!6 little baby ducks.Little Red Riding Hood：(和6只鸭子随着音乐翩翩起舞)

Wolf：（悄悄地藏到大树后）

Little Red Riding Hood：（停止跳舞）Hello!Baby ducks，how are you?

Six Ducks：We’ re fine．Thank you． Where are you going?

Little Red Riding Hood：To Grandma’s．Oh, I must go, bye.Six Ducks：Goodbye．

第三场：Grandma家

Grandma：

（喘着气出场，颤颤悠悠地走到床前，吃力地坐到床边，喘了几口，打几个哈欠，慢吞吞地躺倒在床上。）

Wolf：（从树后出来，边走边说）I am very hungry now.(做找寻的样子)Where is Grandma’ s house?(高兴地对观众说)Aha , it’s here.(敲门)Bang, Bang, Bang．

Grandma：

Who is it？

Wolf：（装出Little Red Riding Hood的声音，一边得意地摇动尾巴，一边说）It’s me.Little Red Riding Hood.Grandma：

(边说边起床)Come in, come in.Wolf：(得意洋洋地走到床边)Grandma , I’ll eat you.Grandma：（惊慌失措地抓紧衣服，瞪着眼睛，边叫迫从床上滚到地上）

灰狼把外婆吞到了肚子里。

Wolf：（得意地拍拍肚子，翘起大拇指）Yummy！I’ll sleep.Little Red Riding Hood：(高兴地敲门)Grandma．Grandma．

Wolf：(装扮成Grandma的声音)Who is it？

Little Red Riding Hood：It’s me。Little Red Riding Hood.What a strange noise!

Wolf：Come in，Come in.Little Red Riding Hood：(蹦跳着进来，把篮子放在桌紫，走到床前一看，跳回几步)Oh!What are big ears!

Wolf：I can listen to your sweet voice.Little Red Riding Hood：Wow!What a big eyes!

Wolf：I can see you pretty face.Little Red Riding Hood：Oh!What a big hand.Wolf：I can hug you.Little Red Riding Hood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，边摸边说）Look!What a big hands?

Wolf：(从床上跳起来说)I can eat you!

Little Red Riding Hood：(拼命地跑)Oh！No!No!

Wolf：（追到Little Red Riding Hood，做吃状，拍拍肚子说）It’s delicious.I still sleep.I like sleeping.Hunter：

(一边拿着枪，一边做寻找状出场)Where’s the wolf? Look!A door．(推门)The wolf is sleeping.Wolf：(发出呼呼的响声)

Hunter：

(端起枪想打，又放下)What a big stomach!(摸摸Wolf的肚子)Grandma and Little Red Riding Hood are inside.I must be hurry．(从桌紫拿起剪刀，举起)Look!Scissors.(做剪Wolf的肚子)Cut, cut, cut.Little Red Riding Hood/Grandma：Thank you．

Hunter：

Grandma ,give me some needles and thread．

Little Riding Hood ,Give me some stones．

Grandma：

(从桌紫拿来针线)

Little Red Riding Hood：(搬来几个石头)One, two, three.Hunter：

(把小石头装进Wolf的衣服里)

Grandma：

I'll thread it.Hunter：

(拿起枪)Woke up!

Wolf：(起床，两手托着大肚子)My stomach is so heavy.Hunter：

You big bad wolf, raise your arms!

Wolf：(边跑边说)Help!Don’t shot me!

Hunter：（开枪）Bang, bang!

Wolf：(应声倒下)

Hunter：

The bad wolf is dead．

Little Red Riding Hood和Grandma：Yeah!Thank you．

Little Red Riding Hood、Grandma、Hunter（一起鞠躬）: Thank you Whose Fault Cast Mr.Green Miss Blue Police Nurse Doctor Daughter------------------Scene I(Green Garden St.)(During the rush hours, when the street is crowded , Mr.Green is driving past the red light , unexpectedly a car accident happens...Two people came out of their cars angrily...)Miss Blue: Oh!It's you, Mr.Green...Do you know how to drive your car? Mr.Green: You see that I was driving across the road!Wow!There is a dent on my beloved BENZ.Miss Blue: My BMW has got a dent too, you should compensate me.(While they are quarrelling, later on, the police comes.)Police: What's happened? Mr.Green: She has bumped into my car!Miss Blue: No!It is himself that drove past the red light...(Quarrel again...)Police: Has any one been injured? Mr.Green: I feel headache , foot ache , ache very much.Miss Blue: I ache all over too.(Both of them mourn painfully...)Police: Then I'll call an ambulance(O-E-O-E...).------------------Scene II(Blue Sky Hospital-Emergency)(Ambulance sends them to the hospital)Nurse: Who is injured?(Both of them say it is themselves at the same time...)Nurse: What's your name, Mr.? Mr.Green: Call me DPP Green.Nurse:(Unhappy facial expression)Oh!Go to the corner and sit there.Mr.Green: But...(nurse interrupts)Nurse: Go!Don't speak any words.....what's your name, Miss? Miss Blue: My name is KMT Blue.Nurse:(gentle and smiles)Oh, Miss this side, please.Would you tell me how you are feeling? Miss Blue: Oh!I ache all over...Nurse: OK!I'll help you stop the pain first, and then the doctor will treat you in a while.(Mr.Green comes over to require medical treatment, but rejected)Mr.Green: Nurse, I...I feel...Nurse: Wait there, didn't you hear me?(Mr.Green goes back helplessly, the doctor comes over at this moment...)Nurse: The young lady called KMT Blue...KMT Blue.Doctor: Ok!I see...How are you, Miss? Miss Blue: I got an car accident and I ache all over...Doctor:(Check)It's ok...don't worry about it.I'll give you some medicine.You'll get well soon......Miss Blue: Thank you, doctor..(Miss Blue leaves.)Doctor: Next one.(Mr.Green comes in and Dr.reads his medical record)You are called DPP Green!Mr.Green: Yeah!Any problem with that ? Doctor: Hmm...(Consider)DPP Green(Raise up voice)? What's wrong with you? Mr.Green: I ache all over-headache, toothache and foot ache(The doctor interrupts him impatiently)...Doctor: I...I...I see, Miss Lin – give Mr.Green an injection...Mr.Green: What? An injection?(Nurse takes out the syringe)Nurse: Where do you want to inject?(Mr.Green is frightened and shivering...)Mr.Green: Well, doctor...that...I do not ache anymore, I...I want to leave.Nurse: Wait!Don't go...(Nurse pulls Mr.Green and forces him to enter the injection room)Mr.Green: Wow!......That hurts!(Miss Blue goes out of the emergency room, but Mr.Green leaves in terrible pain.)------------------Scene III(Taiwan House)(Both of them come back home, then open the door and go into the house at the same time...)Daughter: Dad...Mom...What happened to both of you? Dad, you look pale.Mom, you look terrible, too.Mr.Green: I would not be like this if not for your mother...Miss Blue: What!That is your father's fault and he blames me impudently for...(Daughter is cold and shrugs–then watching TV)Daughter: Oh!I understand it.Even since the Presidential Election, there's no peace in our home.(Both of them are still quarrelling....)

英文小短剧本文转自www.xiexiebang.comiminal?

S;Ah......you are too late ,Nezha!(对T)I've called the police.N:(摇醒B)You are under arrest.(出示证件)You have the right to remain silent If you give up the right, anything you will say can and will be against you in a court of law!(带走B)

T: Wukong(S不理T)I admit my mistake this time(S仍不理)I'm sorry(小声)

S: What?

T: I'm sorry.S: Em? Louder,please?

T: I......am......sorry.....(S 捂耳)（音乐响）《敢问路在何方》（这个放伴奏）

T: Let's go guys!(歌)S: You are carrying the luggage, I am leading the horse.E: Say goodbye to the sun, Welcome evening glow.J: Sleeping on the ground, again we set out set out, again we set out.T.S.E.J: Ah......Ah......Sleeping on the ground again we set out.T: One after the other the seasons go by,and ohe after the other, the year go on.You wonder where the road is.The road is under your feet.T.S.E.J: You uonder where the road is, the road is under your feet......英语童话剧(剧本)Rabbit's birthday

旁白：There are a lot of lovely animals in the forests.They're living a happy life.Little rabbit wants to invite some friends to his birthday party.Early in the morning, the rabbits are busy.第一幕

1.音乐起，房子，小树上场 Houses: We are houses.Trees: We are trees.Tree1: I'm tree.I'm a little tree.Tree2: I'm green.Tree3: I'm tree.I'm a beautiful tree.Trees: We are the forest.(树后退至背景处)2.音乐起，花上场

Flower1: I'm red flower.Flower2: I'm yellow flower.Flower3: I'm purple flower.Flower4: I'm blue flower.Flower5: I'm pink flower.Flowers: We are flowers.3 音乐起兔上

Rabbit: Today is my birthday.I invite a lot of friends to my birthday party.I'm waiting for them in my house.(到房子里等待，从窗口探出头等待)第二幕：小兔朋友上场 1、音乐起，萝卜上

Turnip: I'm a turnip.I grow and grow.I'm getting bigger and bigger.I'm ripe now.2、音乐起，猴子跳上场

Monkey1: I'm monkey.I can jump.Monkey2: I'm monkey.I can jump,too.Monkey1: Little rabbit invited us to her birthday.Let's go.Monkey2: OK!边跳边唱儿歌：Might as well jump.Jump!Go ahead, jump.Might as well jump.Jump!Go ahead, jump.3、遇见萝卜

Turnip： Hello, monkeys!Look I'm ripe.Please pull me up.Monkey1: Today is rabbit's birthday.We can take this turnip as a birthday present for her.Monkey2: All right.Let's try.Monkeys: Hi-yo!Hi-yo!One, two,three!Hi-yo!Hi-yo!One, tow,three!We can't pull you out!4、小猪上场

Pig : Oink-Oink!I want to go to rabbit's birthday!Oink-Oink!~~ Monkey1: Pig!Pig!Help!Help!Pig : What are you doing ? Monkey2: We want to take this turnip as a birthday present for rabbit.But we can't pull it out.Please help us!Pig& Monkeys: Hi-yo!Hi-yo!One, two,three!Hi-yo!Hi-yo!One, tow,three!We can't pull you out!5、小鸟上场 [Little birds]mp3 跳舞 放音乐 Bird1: I'm bird.Bird2: I'm bird.I can sing in the tree.Bird3: I'm bird,too.Birds: We're birds.Monkey1: Birds!Birds!Help!Help!Monkey2: We want to take this turnip as a birthday present for rabbit.But we can't pull it out.Please help us!Animals: Hi-yo!Hi-yo!One, two,three!Hi-yo!Hi-yo!One, tow,three!We can't pull you out!6、狮子上场，音乐起

(看见小动物们)Lion : Roar-Roar!What are you doing? Monkey1: We want to take this turnip as a birthday present for rabbit(声音要胆怯)Lion：I want to go with you.Animals: No,no no.Go away!Lion: I know I'm not good.But~~I can help you pull out the turnip.(动物们讨论一下)Animals：All right.But you must treat everyone well from now on.Lion: OK!Animals: Hi-yo!Hi-yo!One, two,three!Hi-yo!Hi-yo!One, tow,three!Hurrah!Hurrah!We pull out the big turnip!Lion: Let's carry the big turnip to the rabbits.Monkey1: Let's go!Monkey2: Let's sing.Animals: OK!(扛着萝卜，唱着歌，绕场一周)

第三幕：在小兔家，小兔一家正在准备东西 1（狮子来敲门，小兔听见狮子，不敢开门）Lion: Open the door!Open the door!Rabbit: Oh!Lion!I don't want to open the door!Mumy: Dear, please open the door.Rabbit: No,no!Mumy: No, it's not good.We are all the friends.(小兔想了一下）Rabbit: OK!(大家进门，把礼物送给小兔)Animals: Happy birthday to you!Rabbit: Thank you!2 兔妈妈端上水果

Rabbit: Apples, apples, red apples!(边说边分)Animals：Apples, apples, red apples!Rabbit: Bananas,bananas, yellow bananas!Animals: Bananas,bananas, yellow bananas!Rabbit: Grapes, grape,purple grape!Animals: Grapes, grape,purple grape!Animals：Apple red, apple sweet~~~(音乐起，围着大萝卜又唱又跳)Rabbit: Hello,friends!Come on!Let's dance.Let's sing!Animals: Happy birthday to you!(蛋糕上，摆pose)(全剧终)