英文短剧--孔雀东南飞（合集5篇）

第一篇：英文短剧--孔雀东南飞

1.【转】搞笑英文短剧<孔雀东南飞> 孔雀东南飞

焦仲卿Johnny(J for short)刘兰芝Lanzhi(L for short)焦母Johnny's mother(JM for short)刘母Lanzhi's mother(LM for short)太守之子Mayor's son(MS for short)强盗Burglars(A B and C)

(the lines are tentative and some parts are subject to change)Prologue(J作被打状跑上台, 内砸出一卷纸筒, J被打中,狼狈不堪)J: Everyone says that I'm weak, but in fact, I'm as strong as a tiger,(小声)while my wife is Wu Song.(指着上台处的门大声道)I'm not afraid of you!(内砸出一脸盆,Ｊ接住当成盾牌护着头)Then, who am I afraid of? My wife Lanzhi is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.She is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than me.I do not care.about all of this ,I only want her to be more tender than me.But she is not!Having a wife like this is just like living in hell!(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J)My God!Who can help me?(下)Act1(序幕结束时,JM作窃听状)JM(拄拐棍上):I can!(对门内)Lanzhi!Lanzhi!Where are you? L(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I'm here!What's up mum? JM: I've told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful ,graceful and dearest mother-in-law”.(加动作)L: OK.My most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what's up? JM: Since you married my son you have behaved so badly.You have been so rude, so brusque, so lazy…… L: But……

JM: Never interrupt me!L: Never interrupt me!Since I married your son, that terrible Johnny, I have been working hard all day long, cooking and washing.I have raised tens of thousands of pigs and ducks and chicken and……

JM:But all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson!L(生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh, you want a grandson, don' t you?(开始解围裙)Go and ask your son.I'm leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下)Act2(LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上)L: Mum, I'm back!LM: You are back? Why? What happened? L:I was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law.LM(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!I have already told you!When you insisted on marrying that terrible Johnny,I told you that he is ugly stupid and poor, but you did not listen to me.Look at yourself…… L: But, mum…… LM: Never interrupt me!L: Mum, I'm not interrupting you.I just want to tell you that you are always right OK? And I'll marry whom ever you want me to.LM(大喜):Nice girl!Just now, I met the mayor's son in the market.He said :“If you daughter haven't been married, I really really want to marry her!” Now you are free again, I'll go and tell him.(下)L(惊愕):What? The mayor's son? The most famous play boy in the neighbor-hood?(手中的锅铲掉在地上)What a silly thing I have done!(下)Act3(J睡眼惺忪上)J(边走边道):Lanzhi!Lanzhi!Where are my socks?(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)Here they are!(闻一下)Er!How smelly!They are still dirty!(突然想起)Lanzhi has gone!I have to wash them myself.(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)Oh,I'm so hungry!But there's no breakfast!(捡起地上的围裙)This is what Lanzhi always wears!I miss her so much,and her excellent cooking skill!Now she has gone.I have to cook for my mother and myself.JM(上):Where's my breakfast?Where'sLanzhi?Hasn't she got up yet? J:Mum,can't you remember?Lanzhi has gone!JM(沉吟片刻):Well, Johnny,you know ,a son without a wife is useless.Lanzhi is a nice girl,go and take her back!J(立正敬礼):Yes madam!JM(拍拍J的肩膀):My good son!Act4(J开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)A:Hey you!Stop and listen to us!The road is built by me!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)B:And I planted one tree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)C:If you want to go by this street---(欲踩石头，但踩到了A的脚)AB&C:Give us all your money!J(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出１角硬币):Is 1 mao enough?(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)A:What bad luck!This guy is broken!B:If we cannot rob any money today,we will have nothing to eat tonight!C:I heard that the mayor's son is going to marry MissLiuLanzhi next month.WE can go and rob the wedding!A&B:Good idea!

J(惊讶):What?What?Lanzhi is going to get married?It's impossible!AB&C:Why?A pretty girl and a rich man,what a good couple!J:But Lanzhi is my wife!We haven't got divorced yet!(突然有了主意)I've got an idea!You are going to rob the wedding,don't you?I'll go with you.You take the money and I take the bride.B:Have you got any experience?

J:No.But I've got this!(J脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄１，０００，０００)Act5(转眼已到了婚礼之期．MS意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，J盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台,同时播放婚礼喜庆音乐)(J和三强盗跃至台中,音乐停)ABC&J:Hey you!Stop and listen to us!A:The road is built by me!B:And I planted one tree.C:If you want to go by this street---J:Give us all your money!(L听到J的声音，掀起了盖头)L(惊喜万分):Johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到J的身边并躲到了的身后)(MS大怒，挥拳向J打来．J矮身一躲，MS打中了J身后的L，L晕倒)J(火冒三丈):How dare you beat my wife!（挥拳向MS冲去,播放京剧武场音乐）(J与MS混战，JM上，以拐杖击晕MS, 音乐停),(J将MS胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)JM(走到L,身旁):Lanzhi!Lanzhi!J(扶起L，关切地问):Honey, how are you? L(哭状):I hurt a lot!J: Don't cry baby.I'll go and fetch the medicine.(下)L(起身去追):Wait for me!(跑下)JM(起身去追): Wait for me!(慢慢跑下)MS(苏醒过来,慢慢爬起): Wait for me!(谢幕)

第二篇：孔雀东南飞--英语搞笑短剧剧本

焦仲卿johnny(j for short)刘兰芝lunch(l for short)焦母johnny’s mother(jm for short)刘母lunch’s mother(lm for short)太守之子mayor’s son(ms for short)强盗burglars(a b and c)prologue 序幕

(j作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,j被打中,狼狈不堪)j:everybody says that i’m hen pecked, but in fact,i’m a strong tiger,(小声)while my wife is wusong.译：人人都说我怕老婆，实际上我是老虎，（小声）我妻子是武松。(指着上台处的门大声道)i’m not afraid of you!译：我才不怕你呢！

(内砸出一脸盆,j接住当成盾牌护着头)then, i’m afraid of whom!my wife lunchi is the most famous woman in the neighborhood.she is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than me.all this i do not care.i only want her to be tenderer than me.but she is not!having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!译：谁怕谁啊！在邻里中，我妻子是最有名气的。她比我勇敢、比我聪明、比我强壮。我也不在乎这些。我只觉得她该对我温柔些，但是她却不懂温柔！有这样的太太就像活在地狱中啊！(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中j)my god!who can help me?(下)译：我的天！谁来救救我啊？ act1 第一幕

(序幕结束时,jm作窃听状)jm(拄拐棍上):i can!(对门内)lunch!lunch!where are you? l(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):i’m here!what’s up，mum? jm:i have told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law”.l:ok.my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what’s up?

jm:since you married my son you have behaved so badly.you have been so rude, so brusque,so lazy…… l:but……

jm:never interrupt me!l:never interrupt me!since i married your son, that terrible johnny, i have been working hard all day long, cooking and washing.i have raised tens of thousands of pigs and ducks and chicken and……

jm: but all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson!l(生气地挥动着锅铲):oh, you want a grandson, don’t you?(开始解围裙)go and ask your son.i’m leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在jm的脸上,下)act2(lm坐在台上打毛线,l拿着锅铲上)l: mum, i’m back!

lm: you are back?why? what happened? l:i was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law.lm(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):see!i have already told you!when you insisted on marrying that terrible johnny, i told you that he is ugly, stupid and poor, but you did not listen to me.look at yourself…… l: but, mum…… lm: never interrupt me!l: mum, i’m not interrupting you.i just want to tell you that you are always right ok? And i’ll marry whomever you want me to.lm(大喜): nice girl!just now, i met the mayor’s son in the market.he said, “if your daughter haven’t been married, i really really want to marry her!” now you are free again, i ’ll go and tell him.(下)l(惊愕): what? the mayor’s son? the most famous playboy in the neighborhood?(手中的锅铲掉在地上)what a silly thing i have done!(下)act3(j睡眼惺忪上)j(边走边道): lunch!lunch!where are my socks?(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)here they are!(闻一下)er!how smelly!they are still dirty!(突然想起)lunch has gone!i have to wash them myself.(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)oh, i’m so hungry!but there’s no breakfast!(捡起地上的围裙)this is what lunch always wears!i miss her so much, and her excellent cooking skill!Now she has gone.i have to cook for my mother and myself.jm(上): where’s my breakfast? where’s lunch? hasn’t she got up yet? j: mum, can’t you remember? lunch has gone!jm(沉吟片刻): well, to tell you the truth johnny, a son without a wife is useless.lunch is a nice girl, go and take her back!j(立正敬礼): yes madam!act4(j开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)a: hey you!stop and listen to us!the road is built by me!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)b: and i planted one tree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)c: if you want to go by this street---(欲踩石头，但踩到了a的脚)ab&c: give us all your money!j(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出1角硬币):is 1mao enough?(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)a: what bad luck!this guy is broken!b: if we cannot rob any money today, we will have nothing to eat tonight!c: i heard that the mayor’s son is going to marry miss liu lanzhi next month.we can go and rob the wedding!a&b: good idea!j(惊讶): what? what? lunch is going to get married? it’s impossible!ab&c: why? a pretty girl and a rich man, what a good couple!j: but lunch is my wife!we haven’t got divorced yet!(突然有了主意)i’ve got an idea!you are going to rob the wedding, don’t you? i’ll go with you.you take the money and i take the bride.b: have you got any experience? j: no.but i’ve got this!(j脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄1，000，000)act5(转眼已到了婚礼之期．ms意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，j盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)(j和三强盗跃至台中)abc&j: hey you!stop and listen to us!a: the road is built by me!b: and i planted one tree.c: if you want to go by this street---j: give us all your money!(l听到j的声音，掀起了盖头)l(惊喜万分): johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到j的身边并躲到了的身后)(ms大怒，挥拳向j打来．j矮身一躲，ms打中了j身后的l，l晕倒)j(火冒三丈): how dare you beat my wife!（挥拳向ms冲去）(j与ms混战，jm上，以拐杖击晕ms)(j将ms胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)j(扶起l，关切地问):honey, how are you? l(哭状): i hurt a lot!j: don’t cry baby.i’ll go and fetch the medicine.(下)l(起身去追):wait for me!(跑下)

第三篇：英文短剧狼来了

狼来了 英文短剧剧本 THE WOLF IS COMING

（男孩1人，农民4人，小羊10人）



SCENE ONE:

旁白：long long ago, there is a boy who keep a flock of sheep on the

mountain.男孩上，赶着一群羊（音乐起：LONG LONG AGO。男孩和羊一起跳舞）然后走到

树下休息，音乐停。

Boy: 挥舞着他手中的鞭子。Hmn, it’s boring.(嗯，太无聊了。灵机一动)Um, I

have a good idea.(嗯,我有了一个好主意.我相信人们很快就会来了。)大声喊A

wolf is coming.A wolf is coming.Help!(狼来了。狼来了。救命啊！)

(山下有几名农民在干活。他们听到了男孩的声音。)

Farmer A&B&C&D: Let’s go and help him.Let’s kill the wolf.(是的，咱们去帮

他。快去打狼吧。)(越来越多的农民停下手中的活儿，拿着棍棒和农具上山了。)

Farmer A&B&C&D: Where’s the wolf? Can you see it?(狼呢？你看见了吗？)

Boy: Hahaha!Sorry.There’s no wolf here.I’m joking.Haha…(哈哈哈，对不起，这儿没有狼，我开玩笑呢。哈哈哈……)

Farmer A: No wolf? You cheat us.It is not good to do this.(没有狼？你骗我们。这

样做不好。)

Boy: Hahaha!What fools!Hahaha……(哈！真傻，哈哈……)

农民们很生气他们下山继续干活了。

Boy:（赶着羊群下台）Let’s go!Let’s go!



SCENE TWO:

男孩上，赶着一群羊（音乐起：MARY HAS A LITTLE LAMB。男孩和羊一起

跳舞）音乐停

Boy: A wolf is coming.A wolf is coming.Help!Help!(狼来了。狼来了。救命啊！

救命啊！)

Farmer A(对 Farmer B&C&D说): Maybe the wolf is really coming.(或许这一次

狼真的来了。)

Boy: Help!Help…(救命啊救命啊狼来了…….)

Farmer A: Let’s go and kill the wolf.(咱们上山打狼去。)

Farmer B&C&D:OK.(他们向山顶爬,有人都累得爬不到山顶了。可是当他们爬到山顶时，却发现根本没有狼。)

Farmer A&B&C&D: Where’s the wolf?（狼在哪儿？）

Boy: Hahaha!Don’t angry with me, uncles.Why not sit down and have a chat?(哈哈哈，大叔大伯，你们别生气。坐下来跟我聊会天，好吗？)

Farmer A: What a bad boy!Don’t believe him.(这孩子真不象话，别再理了。)Farmer B&C&D: Let’s go!咱们走!(男孩笑弯了腰。农民们气愤地离开了。)Boy:（赶着羊群下台）Let’s go!Let’s go!

SCENE THREE:

一个晴朗的早上,小孩在山顶上放羊。（音乐起：wish you a merry Christmas.）突然,他听到一阵怪叫声。狼真的来了。

Boy:(他怕极了。)Wolf!Wolf!The wolf is really coming.Help!Help!(狼!狼!狼真的来了。快救命啊!)

Wolf: So many fat sheep.I can have a good lunch.(这么多肥羊。我我能吃顿丰盛的午餐了。)

Boy: The wolf is coming.Help!The wolf is coming.Help!(狼来了。救命!)旁白：（But no one came this.The wolf killed a sheep, and went after the boy.The boy fell down the hill.He was saved.After that, he never lied.可是这一次没有人来。狼咬死一只羊，又去追那孩子。小孩摔下山坡。他被救了。)

Boy: I’m sorry, I’ll never lie again.男孩哭着说(对不起，我以后再也不敢撒谎了。)

主持稿：

1)A&B:Good morning, everyone.Welcome to English day!

A:It’s a fine day.Nice to meet you.B:First, let’s do ‘copy me’together.Music, please.2)B:Next,please enjoy the show ‘the wolf is coming’.3)A:Time flies.So much for today, see you next time.B: Byebye!

第四篇：搞笑版英文话剧 孔雀东南飞

焦仲卿johnny(jforshort)刘兰芝lunch(lforshort)焦母johnny’s mother(jmforshort)刘母lunch’s mother(lmforshort)太守之子mayor’sson(msforshort)强盗burglars(abandc)prologue 序幕

(j作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,j被打中,狼狈不堪)j:everybody says that i’m hen pecked, but in fact,i’m a strong tiger,(小声)while my wife is wusong.译：人人都说我怕老婆，实际上我是老虎，（小声）我妻子是武松。

(指着上台处的门大声道)i’m not afraid of you!译：我才不怕你呢！

(内砸出一脸盆,j接住当成盾牌护着头)then, i’m afraid of whom!my wife lunchi is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.she is braver than me,smarter than me and stronger than me.all this i donot care.i only want she to be tender than me.but she is not!having a wife like this is just like living in the hell!

译：谁怕谁啊！在邻里中，我妻子是最有名气的。她比我勇敢、比我聪明、比我强壮。我也不在乎这些。我只觉得她该对我温柔些，但是她却不懂温柔！有这样的太太就像活在地狱中啊！(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中j)my god!who can help me?(下)译：我的天！谁来救救我啊？ act1 第一幕

(序幕结束时,jm作窃听状)jm(拄拐棍上):i can!(对门内)lunch!lunch!where are you? l(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):i’m here!what’s up，mum? jm:i have told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother in law”.l:ok.my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what’s up?

jm:since you married my son you have be havedso badly.you have been so rude, so brusque,so lazy…… l:but……

jm:never interrupt me!

l:never interrupt me!since i married your son, that terrible johnny,i have been working hard all daylong,cooking and washing.i have raised tens of thousands of pigs and ducks and chicken and……

jm:but all those you have done arenot asvaluable as a grandson!l(生气地挥动着锅铲):oh,you want a grandson,don’t you?(开始解围裙)go and ask your son.i’m leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在jm的脸上,下)act2(lm坐在台上打毛线,l拿着锅铲上)l:mum, i’m back!

lm:you are back?why?what happened? l:i was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law.lm(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):see!i have already told you!when you insisted on marrying that terrible johnny, i told you that he is ugly tupid and poor, but you did not listen to me.look at yourself…… l:but,mum……

lm:never interrupt me!

l:mum,i’m not interrupting you.i just want to tell you that you are always right ok? and i’ll marry whomever you want me to.lm(大喜):nice girl!just now, i met the mayor’s son in the market.he said:“if your daughter haven’t been married,i really really want to marry her!”now you are free again, i ’ll go and tell him.(下)l(惊愕):what? the mayor’s son?the most famous playboy in the neighbor-hood?(手中的锅 铲掉在地上)what a silly thing i have done!(下)act3(j睡眼惺忪上)j(边走边道):lunch!lunch!where are mysocks?(走了几步,在地上捡起袜子)here they are!(闻一下)er!how smelly!they are still dirty!(突然想起)lunch has gone!i have to wash them myself.(他的肚子似乎咕咕叫了起来)oh,i’m so hungry!but there’s no breakfast!(捡起地上的围 裙)this is what lunch always wears!i miss her so much, and her excellent cooking skill!now she has gone.i have to cook for my mother and myself.jm(上):where’s my breakfast? where’slunch?hasn’t she got up yet? j:mum, can’t you remember?lunch has gone!

jm(沉吟片刻):well, to tell you the truth johnny, a son without a wife is suseless.lunch is an ice girl,go and take her back!j(立正敬礼):yes madam!act4(j开心地走着，忽然跳出来三个强盗)a:hey you!stop and listen to us!the road is built by me!(抬脚重重地踩在一块大石头上)b:and i planted one tree!(亦抬脚踩在同一块石头上)c:if you want to go by this street---(欲踩石头，但踩到了a的脚)ab&c:give us all your money!j(搜遍了每一个口袋，掏出1角硬币):is 1mao enough?(三强盗晕倒状，接着三人聚在一边商量)a:what bad luck!this guy is broken!

b:if we cannot robany money today,we will havenot thing to eat tonight!c:i heard that the mayor’s son is going to marry miss liulanzhi next month.we can go and rob the wedding!a&b:good idea!j(惊讶):what? what? lunch is going to get married? it’s impossible!ab&c:why? a pretty girl and a richman,what a good couple!j:but lunch is my wife!we haven’t got divorced yet!

(突然有了主意)i’ve got an idea!you are going to rob the wedding, don’tyou? i’ll go with you.you take the money and i take the bride.b:have you got any experience? j:no.but i’ve got this!(j脱下鞋子从里面摸出一张支票，上书＄1，000，000)act5(转眼已到了婚礼之期．ms意气风发用红绸牵着新娘上，j盖着红盖头极不情愿地被拉上台)(j和三强盗跃至台中)abc&j:hey you!stop and listen to us!a:the road is built by me!b:and i planted one tree.c:if you want to go by this street---j:give us all your money!(l听到j的声音，掀起了盖头)l(惊喜万分):johnny!(不顾一切地飞奔到j的身边并躲到了的身后)(ms大怒，挥拳向j打来．j矮身一躲，ms打中了j身后的l，l晕倒)j(火冒三丈):how dare you beat my wife!（挥拳向ms冲去）(j与ms混战，jm上，以拐杖击晕ms)(j将ms胸前的新郎标志扯下戴在自己胸前)j(扶起l，关切地问):honey, how are you? l(哭状):i hurt a lot!j:don’t cry baby.i’ll go and fetch the medicine.(下)l(起身去追):wait for me!(跑下)

第五篇：《孔雀东南飞》（英文搞笑话剧

Wanderseveryfivemiles

焦仲卿Johy(Jforshort)刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort)

焦母Johy’smother(JMforshort)刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort)太守之子Mayor’on(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(ABandC)

Prologue

(J作

被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪)

J:EverybodysaysthatI’mheecked,butinfact,I’matrongasatiger,(小声)whilemy

wifeisWuSong.(指着上台处的门大声道)I’mnotafraidofyou!

(内砸出一脸盆,Ｊ接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’mafraidofwhom?

MywifeLunchisthemostfamouswomanintheneighbor-hood.Sheiraverthanme,smarterthanmeandstrongerthanme.AllthisIdonotcare.Ionlywanthertobetender

thanme.Butsheiot!Havingawifelikethisisjustlikelivinginthehell!

(内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J)

MyGod!Whocanhelpme?(下)

Act1

(序幕结束时,JM作窃听状)

JM(拄拐棍上):Ican!

(对门内)Lunch!Lunch!Whereareyou?

L(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’mhere!What’supmum?

JM:I’vetoldyouagainandagainthatyoushouldcallme“mymostbeautifulgracefuland

dearestmother-in-law”.L:OK.Mymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother-in-law,what’sup?

JM:Sinceyoumarriedmysonyouhavebehavedsobadly.Youhavebeeorude,sobrusque,so

lazy……

L:But……

JM:Neverinterruptme!

L:Neverinterruptme!SinceImarriedyourson,thatterribleJohy,Ihavebeenworkinghardall

daylong,cookingandwashing.Ihaveraisedteofthousandsofpigsandducksandchicken

and……

JM:Butallthoseyouhavedonearenotasvaluableasagrandson!

L(生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,youwantagrandson,don’tyou?(开始解围裙)Goandaskyour

son.I’mleaving!(扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下)

Act2

(LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上)

L:Mum,I’mback!

LM:Youareback?Why?Whathaened?

L:Iwaskickedoutbymymostbeautifulgracefulanddearestmother–in-law.LM(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!Ihavealreadytoldyou!Whenyouiistedon

marryingthatterribleJohy,Itoldyouthatheisuglystupidandpoor,butyoudidnotlisten

tome.Lookatyourself……

L:But,mum……

LM:Neverinterruptme!

L:Mum,I’mnotinterruptingyou.IjustwanttotellyouthatyouarealwaysrightOK?And

I’llmarrywhomeveryouwantmeto.LM(大喜):Nicegirl!Justnow,Imetthemayor’oninthemarket.Hesaid:“Ifyoudaughter

Haven’tbeenmarried,Ireallyreallywanttomarryher!”Nowyouarefreeagain,I’llgo

andtellhim.(下