英语话剧—荆轲刺秦王后传之包公审案(现代版)（范文）

第一篇：英语话剧—荆轲刺秦王后传之包公审案(现代版)（范文）

英语话剧—荆轲刺秦王后传之包公审案（现代版）

（旁白 以下所有旁白用中文）据说很久很久很久很久很久很久，总之是很久以前有个叫秦王嬴政的人，横行无忌，做尽丧尽天良的事情，而燕国有个姓太名子丹的人就因为一件事与秦王对上了头，并且决定找人把他干掉。

场景一：

T（太子丹）：有什么事吗，太太？What's the matter,Mrs?

W（妇女甲）：噢！太子丹我悲伤极了，邻国有个叫亲王的人，把我的爸爸、妈妈、哥哥、姐姐、老公、儿子的菜都偷了，他们还被狗咬伤了。Oh,Dan Prince,I'm so sad!The King of Qin stole all the vegetable of my daddy,mummy,brother,sister,husband and son.What's more,they were also bitten by dog.T：噢！太可怜了，叫他们来偷我的菜吧，我的Q号：709394（出来搞三搞四）。Oh,how pitful!Ask them to steal mine and my QQ NO.is 709394.W：谢谢大人。

（马上上Q）

T:What?农场的东西全都没了，永久不能种菜！？啊，我的农场啊！oh,No!是谁干的？什么？?嬴政？What?All my farm stull was stole and I can't plant vegetable forever.Oh,my god!My farm!Who did?Yingzheng?

(小弟)：Sir,节哀顺变啊，我知道有个武功很厉害的高手，不如叫他把秦王。。。。T：真的吗!?Really?

(小弟)：Yeah,你上Q加他就行了。他叫荆轲，Q名叫“不要迷恋哥”。

T：嗯，加了。Yes，I was done.(荆轲出场，坐在电脑旁)

J（荆轲）：哦，居然有这样的事情，好！哥我帮你，不过要50个Q币，俺想升升黄钻，变变空间。

T：简单啦，我马上送你50个Q币。Good lucky!It's so easy.I will give you 50Q coins.J:好，等我好消息。

场景二：

（旁白）于是，荆轲就通过不知道什么途径，在秦王家里见面了。

J:大王，我把登陆燕国QQ服务器的通行证献给你了，这是U盘，（整句用中文）（小弟上去接并插U盘到电脑处）

Q（秦王）：哇哈哈哈，燕国的农场很快就被我偷光了。Wahahaha,farm stull of Yan will be stolen by me.(背景音乐是杀毒软件报告有毒)

Q：What！想黑我？Want to kill me?(护驾，护驾，用普通话)来人啊，快把他捉住。Help me!Catch him quickly!

Z（展昭）：我来啦(与荆轲对视 顺时针行 突然跳恰恰)

J：就凭你一个怎么能捉我。

Z：我没说我一个人捉你啊，兄弟们上。（群众演员上）

（旁白）另一方面，太子丹收到风，知道荆轲刺杀。。不，是黑杀秦王失败，于是带着老婆走佬（用白话）

T：快点走啊，秦王找人来捉我啊。Run away!King of Qin will kill me.Z：太子丹，不用跑啦（宜家5系事必i要你讲，但你所讲噶将作为呈堂证供白话）T：在我律师来之前，我有权保持沉默（白话）

Z：来人，带他走。

T老婆：噢！Jack！（背景音乐铁达尼号）

T：Rose！

T老婆：Jack！

T：Rose！

T老婆：Jack！

场景三：

（旁白）由于这次暗杀，不，暗黑事件属于国际纠纷，所以秦王就将此事交由国际衙门审理。（两排人，当包公出来，公孙策叫count，旁人舞棍“威武”放包青天音乐）

B（包公）：究竟因何事闹上衙门？（包公的每句话都讲中文，旁边公孙策就英语翻译）Z：报告，事情是这样的，￥￥%*%@%￥！#（用特效）

B：嗯，我什么都听不明白，总之一句话，就是太子丹跟荆轲不对了。

L（律师）：包公大人，据我当事人所做的，并没有黑秦王的电脑啊。

Z：荒谬！在秦王的电脑里，有历史痕迹的，证据都在，还说没有。

L：这只能表明我当事人的电脑中毒，并非故意放毒。

（下面人群鼓掌L回身双手抱拳。并说3Q——thank）

B：肃静肃静！（包公手机响音乐为Only you公孙策接电话）

G（公孙策）：大人，你电话。Mr，yourphone.B：谁打来的？？

G：包夫人。Mrs Bao.B：什么事啊?

G：她说今晚你不说讲清楚就不用回去睡了。She said if you didn't exlain clearly.You couldn;t go back to sleep.(B挂了电话 擦了擦额头)

B：刚刚说到哪里。

Z：大人，“是你今晚不说清楚就不用回去睡了”。

B：Shit！我知道啦，那这件案子就属于意外了（观众鼓掌）那就判你误杀好了。L：Oh ,me god!My god mother!Mamummia.Q：哈哈哈，你们这次死定了。Hahaha,I'm sure you will all die this time.B：来人，猪头铡伺候。Mr，I don' t know how to translate this sentence.B：行啦，我农场的菜快熟了。

L：噢！大人，请你马上看看你的农场啊（打开电脑）。

B：What？？我的菜全都没了！Oh！God mother都不行了。王朝、马汉、张龙、赵虎把那个人——不是那个，是秦王按住。

Q：冤枉啊，大人！Mr，I„m stainless.B：大胆，偷了我的菜还毒死我农场的狗，还标有“秦王到此一偷”的字。

Q：冤枉啊，大人，不是我偷的，冤枉啊！！Oh,nno Mr,I didn't steal anything.I'm stainless.(完)

（下面所有话用潮州话说）

（旁白）其实，菜不是秦王偷的，真正的凶手是

妇女甲：外挂真的好用啊！！It's excellent to use plug！

第二篇：大学生英语话剧--荆轲刺秦王

旁白： Long long ago, there was a crazy country, in this crazy country，there were some crazy

people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways.Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qin,“Yingzheng”.But finally he failed.Do you want to know what happened at that time? OK, next show will tell you the truth.  Part one 太子丹 : Yingzheng,that bad guy ,treats me even worse than before.Resorts to lots of persons

in his hand,he never cares about me---the most sensible prince under the sun.Recently,he has got much more cities from my hands.How can I live if these things happen againHey！I must think out a good idea.I must make him know who I am.嬴政,那个坏家伙,对待我比以前更糟了。仰仗着他手里人多,他从不顾忌我---太阳下最明智的王子。最近,他从我手里夺去了更多的城池。,如果这些事发生，我如何生活嘿！我得想出一个好主意。我要让他知道我是谁。

 太子丹:Indeed, tell me what shall we do now? 事实上,告诉我,我们应该做些什么呢?

 阿三:Just keep calm,please!Let me see!只是保持镇静,请!让我看看!

Ok get one,we can sent a hero to put Ying Zheng to~~~好的,我找到了,我们可以送一个英雄,把嬴政~ ~ Then, all the beauties,jewelries and cities in Qin is ours~~~ 那么,所有的美女、首饰和城市在秦代是

 我们的~ ~ ~太子:Ha, ha~~~.Good idea,Good idea!But do you think who we can sent? 哈哈~ ~ ~。好主意,好主意!但你认为谁是可以送到呢? 阿三：I have thought about it, we can send Xi Men Chui Xue.He is traveling in our country these

days.I think we can’t lose the chance.We must employ him quickly.我认为,我们可以派遣西门吹雪。他这些日子在我国旅游。我认为我们不能失去这个机会。我们必须雇用他

太子:Well, deal with the things as soon as possible.嗯,处理事情尽快。

 Part two

西门吹雪 :Today I came here for the fighting, who is the unwanted-life guy.Stand out.今天我来战斗,谁是unwanted-life的家伙。站出来

荆轲站在一边，不敢出大气。

旁白：Competition begins.荆轲Are you really Xi Men Chui Xue?

西门吹雪：Just come on.荆轲：Are you sure you are really the Xi Men Chui Xue in the story

西门吹雪： what a boring man!How dare you ask me such a stupid question?        

荆轲My hero, I admire you just like the yellow river, never endless.I have eighty-year-old mother up, three-year-old boy down.Please don’t kill me.Give me the life, please!

 西门吹雪I thought Jingke is a hero.But you beg for life.How can I forgive you ,Give you your

life.(我认为荆轲是一个英雄。但你求手下留情。我怎么能原谅你给你留一条命呢 Maybe I ate too much this morning, Maybe there is something wrong with the rice.(抬头)where is the toilet?也许

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 我吃了太多的今天早上,也许有大米毛病了。厕所在哪里? 荆轲：T-o-i-l-e-t-? 西门吹雪：WC.荆轲：W-C-? 西门吹雪：茅厕！Are you happy to hear such rude words?你很高兴听到这样粗鲁的话? 荆轲：I know, I know.Turn left, left and left.我知道,我知道。向左拐,左拐再左拐.西门吹雪下。太子丹与阿三上，看见荆轲，大吃一惊，太子丹给阿三一个眼色，阿三会意。走至荆轲前。阿三: What’s your name, please? Hero.请问你叫什么名字?英雄.荆轲不屑一顾。太子丹May I have your name, please?我可以知道你的名字吗? 荆轲从兜里掏出一卷纸，上面写着Even dying under the flower, Also happy as a ghost.---Happy prince

of the gostjingke：宁 在 花 下 死，作 鬼 也 风 流 —快活魔王荆轲是也

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 太子丹：I am glad to meet you 荆柯：Me too 荆柯突欲走，太子丹给阿三一个眼色。阿三：Hero, wait for a moment.I have a problem needs your help。英雄,稍等片刻。我有一个问题,需要你的帮助． 太子丹：You can gain a lot of things.荆柯欲走又止。太子丹: Here is a card for traveling all over the world for free, please accept it please, hero.这是一张卡片,周游世界免费,请接受吧,英雄。荆柯正准备拿，但马上又止，转身又欲走 太子丹：I must use the last way.Ladies and gentlemen.This is Miss Huang!我一定要用过去的方式。女士们,先生们。这是黄小姐。有一妖艳女子走上，走到荆柯面前，给荆柯抛了一个眉眼。荆柯两眼发直。太子丹与阿三Yeah!荆柯：Great man, both born and die for his motherland.I am not the guy who just wants money and beauty.What shall I do? Prince, just say it out.But this lady„„ 伟大的人,出生和死亡都为他的祖国。我不是那个人只是想要钱和美丽。我该做什么呢?王子,就说出来。但是这个女人„„ 太子丹：No problem.没问题。 Part three 挽着那女子，太子丹在后，阿三一手拿着地图，一手提头上。阿三：We have already reached Yishui River.我们已经达到沂水河。荆珂：Please just stop here.Goodbye.请在这里停车。再见。太子丹：Hero, Let me see you off a little further英雄,让我送你一些 荆珂：What a boring guy.If you walk a little further, then you will go to Qin instead of me 多么无聊的一场的家伙。如果你再走一段,然后你会代替我去秦 太子丹：Well.Goodbye.Hero.Here is the map and the head of Fan Yuqi, so as to get trust of the king 好。再见。英雄。这是地图和樊于期的头部,从而获得信任,尽显王者风范 荆珂 ：How can I express my feeling now? I don’t want to leave because I love you.Once I think

I will kill Yingzheng.I can’t help rushing into W.C.you known.I don’t want to go.I don’t want to go.我怎样才能表达我现在的感受吗?我不想离开,因为我爱你。只要想到我会杀了Yingzheng。我不能自己的冲进了厕所。我不想去。我不想去。

女子：Don’t worry.Do you still love me?别担心。你还爱着我吗?

荆珂：Sure.I love you just like the mouse likes the rice.I love you more than my own life, more than my wife, more than the whole world.You are the one I first kissed, and I hope you will be the last one.当然。我爱你,就像老鼠爱大米。我爱你胜过我的生命,超过我的妻子,超过整个世 界。你就是我的第一次接吻,我希望你将会是最后一个。女子：Well.If you are still loving me.You should not make me sad Stand up like a man.Don’

t be fearful.I will be right here waiting for you.好。如果你仍然爱我。你不应该让我伤心站起来像一个人。别无所畏惧。我将在这里等着你。

荆珂：You must wait for me.你必须等我。

女子努力挤出几滴眼泪，旁白”I will be right here waiting for you”(我将在这里等着你)响起

荆珂上船，渐渐远去，女子：Hey！You want to come back, use your pig head, if you come back, the assurance that I bought for you will have no use.Go to your doom.Never come back.嘿!你想回来,用你的猪头,如果你回来,我买的保险就没有用了。去你的末日。永远都不会回来了。       

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 一大臣跑在前，一大臣紧随其后，跑了一圈，便上气不接下气。大臣甲（掏出手机一看）：Hey, bad luck.I am late.The bonus of this month has been lost.嘿,坏运气。我来晚了。这个月的奖金已经失去。大臣乙：I am tired.I had been chatting on QQ until 1 o’ clock last night.我累了。我在QQ上聊天,直到昨晚1点钟。大臣乙（看了一下大臣甲）：Good.Good.Your skin is fine.好。好。你的皮肤很好 大臣甲：I use “ Da Bao” everyday.我用“大宝”每一天 大臣乙：I have heardthe emperor of Yan again give our king some good things.Be quick, to have a look。我的心的皇帝再给我们的王燕一些好东西。快点,看了一下。大臣甲：Come on 秦王上座，两个大臣各坐一边。卫兵丙：“Can we begin？” 秦王“begin” 卫兵丙：“Let the people of Yan Jingke come in”让人们燕国,荆轲进来 荆柯上。跪下，吓得直发抖。秦王：“Jingke.What’s wrong with you？”荆柯,你有什么不舒服吗? 荆柯：“Nothing.Nothing.May be there are lots of fleas on my body “.没有。没有。可能有许多跳蚤在我身上 秦王（不烦）：What’s the good things，quickly！”有什么好东西,快!荆柯献图，图穷匕首见，荆柯举刀刺秦，（旁白：Go Go Go Only Only响起）秦王摔倒，转身逃跑，其他人抱头趴在地上。两个人围着大臣兜圈，过了一会儿„„ 大臣甲喊道：“ King, drink the milk quickly!”（国王，快喝牛奶）扔了一奶壶，秦王接住，咂了一下，顿时，力大无比，立刻将荆柯打倒在地。秦王:Super rubbish, how dare you kill me?超级垃圾,你怎么敢杀我? 荆柯:I'm sorry I'm wrong But it is the prince of Yan told me to do that。Please forgive me!对不起,我错了,但燕国国王指使我。请您原谅我吧!秦王：You will never live again.What would you like to say?你将永远不会再活。你想说什么? 荆柯：My lovely lady，Once there was a truest love put before my eyes ,but I didn't cherish

it.Only after losing it.I found myself regretting.No pains in the world comes near this, if God Could give me another chance, I would say to the girl “I love you!“If there had to be a limit of time before the end of love.I hope it would be ten thousand years.我的可爱的女人,曾经有一份真诚的爱情放在我面前的眼睛,但是我没有珍惜。只有在失去它。我发现自己后悔了。世界上没有痛苦来到附近,如果上天能再给我一次机会,我想说的是,这个女孩说“我爱你!“如果有在这份爱上加上一个期限结束前的爱。我希望它会是一万年。

秦王（吼道）：Soldiers ,drag him out and put the pig head on the wall！士兵,拖出去并把这头猪的头挂在墙上！

第三篇：英语话剧剧本——荆轲刺秦王修改版

5-9人剧本（男版），短小搞笑

Roles: 太子丹；荆轲；母氏；谋士阿二，三；莫愁；旁白等 旁白(Aside)/介绍（Introduction）： Long long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways.Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”.But finally he failed.Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I

太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world?(画外音：It’s you, Prince Dan!太子丹高兴状)Thank u mirror!（面对观众）I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world.But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth.I am so scared.So what can I do?(向幕里大叫)Where are my ministers? 阿二 阿三: Honey, we are coming.太子丹：I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”!

阿二：Sure, honey!I have a good idea.We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作杀状）太子：Oh yeah~~~.What is the most expensive commodity in this century? 二十一世纪最需要的是什么（这句话要跟观众交流）阿二 阿三：Talent!人才！

太子丹：Great!Good idea!But who is the right candidate? 阿二：After screening I have one promising persons on hand.阿三：I have one too!太子丹：What are they? 阿二：His name is JinKe.阿三：Her name is LiMoChou，my lord!太子丹：but who should I choose ? 阿二：Tomorrow let them PK for the NO1 killer of the world.太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK? 阿二 阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐）荆轲 ：Are you Li mochou? 李莫愁：Yes.荆轲：OK.I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁：Are you challenging me? 荆轲 ：Off course!耸耸肩表示同意 李莫愁：Come on!。。。。。。。。Look，帅哥！

（李莫愁扭头，荆轲打到李莫愁）荆轲大笑

李莫愁痛苦状：What happened? Why？you are 使诈

荆轲: We don't need any reason to win a person.Don't we? Do we?（赢一个人需要理由么，不

需要么，需要么？）

李莫愁：Momma always said: “Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou.You never know what you're gonna get.” I got it, Momma is right.荆轲再次大笑

太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you? 荆柯：Fine, thank you, and you? 太子丹：Oh my God!Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”? 荆柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you? 荆柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife? 太子丹晕倒

荆柯：Hey, man, I’m kidding!

太子丹：Oh, I’m kidding too!（毕恭毕敬）May I have your name card, please? 荆轲从兜里掏出一卷纸，上面写着：

To be or not to be, that's a question.阿二：Hero，we need your help.荆柯：I am busy now!太子丹：You can get a lot of money.荆柯：I am very busy now!阿三：IC, ID, IQ card? 荆柯：I am very very busy now!阿二(手指上场的美女，激动状): Look!She is the most beautiful girl in the world.If you say O.K., she is yours.荆柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love!阿三：What? What’s the TCM?

荆柯： Hey, guy!You look so smart but why you didn’t know TCM? TCM is Traditional Chinese MM.太子丹：Ok!I will 忍痛割爱！母氏 come here!（《No matter》音乐起，荆轲先与母氏跳探戈，拥入怀中）

荆柯： You are so cute, I believe that I have fallen in love with you.That may be the love at first sight!(一见钟情)（将母氏甩出去!抛媚眼)太子丹：You want? Speak up if you want!Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I’m very glad, you still have to speak up.Take them and her!Do you really like? Really? 荆柯(诚恳状)Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you.Action Ш

荆珂挽着母氏，太子丹,阿三在后.阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River.荆珂：Just stop here, please.Farewell, my friends 太子丹：I will miss you, baby.（太子丹，阿二，三下。停顿。《泰坦尼克号》主题曲起 荆珂：Darling, I love you.母氏：I love you!You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救赎》）荆珂(流泪)：I love you more.In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you.。。音乐停(哪怕是世界末日我都会爱着你，选自《飘》)力拔山兮气盖世，时不利兮骓不适，骓不适兮可奈何，母姬，母姬，奈若何！母氏：Well.Be a man, just do it!I will be right here waiting for you.荆珂（欲走还留，执子之手又曰）：Sweetheart!You must do me this honor...promise me you will survive...that you will never give up...no matter what happens...no matter how hopeless...promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克号沉船时，Jack对Rose的倾诉）.母氏:“I promise.” 荆轲:“Never let go.“

母氏:”I promise.I will never let go, Jingke.I'll never let go."（《泰坦尼克号》的台词。）母氏努力挤出几滴眼泪，荆珂上船，渐渐远去（霸王别姬音乐起）第四幕：murdering(刺秦).一大臣跑在前，一大臣紧随其后，跑了一圈，便上气不接下气。

大臣甲（掏出手机一看）：Hey, bad luck.I am late.The bonus of this month has been lost.大臣乙：I am tired.I had been chatting on QQ until 1 o’ clock last night.大臣乙（看了一下大臣甲）：Good.Good.Your skin is fine.大臣甲：I use “ Da Bao” everyday.大臣乙：I have heart the emperor of Yan again give our king some good things.Be quick, to have a look.大臣甲：Come on 秦王上座，两个大臣各坐一边。卫兵甲：“Can we begin？” 秦王“begin”

卫兵甲：“Let the people of Yan Jingke come in” 秦王：“Jingke.What’s wrong with you？”

荆柯：“Nothing.Nothing.May be there are lots of fleas on my body “.秦王（不烦）：What’s the good things，quickly！”

荆柯献图，图穷匕首见，荆柯举刀刺秦，（旁白：Go Go Go Only Only响起）秦王摔倒，转身逃跑，其他人抱头趴在地上。

两个人围着大臣兜圈，过了一会儿……

大臣甲喊道：“Mr King, drink the milk quickly!”扔了一奶壶，秦王接住，咂了一下，顿时，力大无比，立刻将荆柯打倒在地。

秦王:Super rubbish, how dare you kill me? 荆柯:I'm sorry I'm wrong But the prince of Yan told me to。Please forgive me!秦王：You will never live again.What would you like to say?（《大话西游》主题曲响起）

荆柯：My lovely lady，Once there was a truest love put before my eyes ,but I didn't cherish it.Only after losing it.I found myself regretting.No pain in the world comes near this, if God could give me another chance, I would say to the girl “I love you!“If there had to be a limit of time

before the end of love.I hope it would be ten thousand years.秦王（吼道）：Soldiers carry out and put the pig head on the wall！

第五幕：Escape（逃跑）

二个卫兵拖着荆柯上，（手脚以被绑）将荆柯扔到一边。二人气喘吁吁，甲搜身。卫兵甲：Bad luck.He has no money.卫兵乙：Money?? You are joking!I have searched all his body, just two socks.卫兵甲:What?? Two socks? 卫兵乙:Nothing.Nothing.(回头)Too dangerous.卫兵甲:Put the socks out.卫兵乙L极不情愿，拿出了一双大小不一的袜子

卫兵甲看了看，比了比。将长的装进了自己兜里，短的扔给了卫兵乙。卫兵乙：Too dirty.(两人互看)Oh,no.It’s fair.荆柯（抬起头）：I will give you much more money if you set me free.二卫兵：Really? Where is the money? 荆柯指了指脚上的绳子。二卫兵会意，解开了绳子。

荆柯（站起来）：My brothers, I have a good idea.If you do it, you will get lots of money.二卫兵：Oh, please tell it to us!荆柯:You can tie another person instead of me to put to death.Only the king recognizes me but he won’t watch my death.So no one will find out the secret.二卫兵：Good idea！(竖指)荆柯去一边的树林里，拿出两袋钱，扔给二卫兵便大步而去。二卫兵正指着钱，忽路人出现。二卫兵（双目相视，大笑，同声）：Good！两人一把抓住路人

路人：What have I done? I haven’t done anything wrong.Oh, no no！!Have I crime? 二卫兵（异口同声）：Maybe.大笑.(Yesterday once more 起)剧情可自行改动，根据人数可将某些角色的台词化为一人！或一人多个角色！

第四篇：英语话剧剧本——荆轲刺秦王

4-5人剧本，短小搞笑

Roles: 太子丹；荆轲；荆轲妻；谋士阿三；莫愁；旁白 旁白(Aside)/介绍（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways.Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”.But finally he failed.Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I

太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world?(画外音：It’s you, Prince Dan!太子丹高兴状)Thank u mirror!（面对观众）I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world.But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth.I am so scared.So what can I do?(向幕里大叫)Where is my minister?

阿三(毕恭毕敬): Honey, I am coming.I have a good idea.We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作杀状）

太子：Oh yeah~~~.What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世纪最需要的是什么，人才！这句话要跟观众交流，最好由观众来回答，然后拍阿三肩膀，做赞许状）Good idea!But who is the right candidate? 阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand.One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe.Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK? 阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐）荆轲

Are you Li mochou? 李莫愁 Yes.荆轲

OK.I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁

Are you challenging me? 荆轲

Of course!耸耸肩表示同意 李莫愁 Come on!音乐起

两人冲上前来

“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，两刀砍死你啊。。” 李莫愁倒地 荆轲大笑

李莫愁痛苦状：What happened? Why aren’t you hurt?

荆轲: We don't need any reason to win a person.Don't we? Do we?（赢一个人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？）

李莫愁：Momma always said: “Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou.You never know what you're gonna get.” I got it, Momma is right.荆轲再次大笑

太子丹：（毕恭毕敬）May I have your name card, please? 荆轲从兜里掏出一卷纸，上面写着：

To be or not to be, that's a question.阿三：Hero，we need your help.荆柯：I am busy now!太子丹：You can get a lot of money.荆柯：I am very busy now!阿三(手指上场的美女，激动状): Look!She is the most beautiful girl in the world.If you say O.K., she is yours.荆柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love!阿三：What? What’s the TCM?

观众甲：TCM-Traditional Chinese MM.荆柯(诚恳状)If you give me a TCM, I will do anything for you.太子丹与阿三（撞胯，击掌）Yeah!

Action Ш（《大话西游》主题曲响起）（太子丹，阿三下。停顿。《泰坦尼克号》主题曲起，荆轲与妻子做Jack和rose在船头的经典造型，荆珂：Darling, I love you.妻子：I love you!You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救赎》）荆珂(流泪)：I love you more.In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you.(哪怕是世界末日我都会爱着你，选自《飘》)妻子：Well.Be a man, just do it!I will be right here waiting for you.荆珂（欲走还留，执子之手又曰）：Sweetheart!You must do me this honor...promise me you will survive...that you will never give up...no matter what happens...no matter how hopeless...promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克号沉船时，Jack对Rose的倾诉）.妻子:“I promise.” 荆轲:“Never let go.“

妻子:”I promise.I will never let go, Jack.I'll never let go."（荆轲的发音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克号》的台词。）荆珂上船，渐渐远去

旁白：Then Jingke was sent to Qin and finally killed by Yingzheng.The End

第五篇：英语话剧剧本——荆轲刺秦王

4-5人剧本，短小搞笑

Roles: 太子丹；荆轲；荆轲妻；谋士阿三；莫愁；旁白 旁白(Aside)/介绍（Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways.Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”.But finally he failed.Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth.Action I

太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）：Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world?(画外音：It’s you, Prince Dan!太子丹高兴状)Thank u mirror!（面对观众）I’m Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world.But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror told him the truth.I am so scared.So what can I do?(向幕里大叫)Where is my minister?

阿三(毕恭毕敬): Honey, I am coming.太子丹：I’ve told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”!

阿三：Sure, honey!I have a good idea.We can find a hero to kill YingZheng~~~（作杀状）太子：Oh yeah~~~.What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世纪最需要的是什么，人才！这句话要跟观众交流，最好由观众来回答，然后拍阿三肩膀，做赞许状）Good idea!But who is the right candidate? 阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand.One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe.Tomorrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world.太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK? 阿三：Yes.Action II（《十面埋伏》中刘德华&金成武决斗时的音乐）荆轲

Are you Li mochou? 李莫愁 Yes.荆轲

OK.I’m Jingke, you know, I will let you know I am the king of the killers’ world.李莫愁

Are you challenging me? 荆轲

Off course!耸耸肩表示同意 李莫愁 Come on!音乐起

两人冲上前来

“人在江湖漂啊，哪有不挨刀啊，一刀砍死你啊，两刀砍死你啊。。” 李莫愁倒地 荆轲大笑 李莫愁痛苦状：What happened? Why aren’t you hurt?

荆轲: We don't need any reason to win a person.Don't we? Do we?（赢一个人需要理由么，不需要么，需要么？）

李莫愁：Momma always said: “Life is like a box of chocolates, Mochou.You never know what you're gonna get.” I got it, Momma is right.荆轲再次大笑

太子丹上（抱拳）：How are you? 荆柯：Fine, thank you, and you? 太子丹：Oh my God!Could you give me an innovative answer to “How are you”? 荆柯：Sure!太子丹：How are you? 荆柯：Fine, thank you, and your wife? 太子丹晕倒

荆柯：Hey, man, I’m kidding!

太子丹：Oh, I’m kidding too!（毕恭毕敬）May I have your name card, please? 荆轲从兜里掏出一卷纸，上面写着：

To be or not to be, that's a question.阿三：Hero，we need your help.荆柯：I am busy now!太子丹：You can get a lot of money.荆柯：I am very busy now!阿三：IC, ID, IQ card? 荆柯：I am very very busy now!阿三(手指上场的美女，激动状): Look!She is the most beautiful girl in the world.If you say O.K., she is yours.荆柯（流口水）：I have to say she is a very sexy and beautiful girl, but TCM is my only love!阿三：What? What’s the TCM?

荆柯;Hey, guy!You look so smart but why you didn’t know TCM? Any of them can give you the answer.阿三：Excuse me? What’s the TCM?

观众甲：TCM-Traditional Chinese MM.太子丹：I must show you the trump card.Ladies and gentlemen, this is Lipton Slimming tea.It is a brand new product of Unilever China.荆柯（激动）：Slimming tea!I have dreamed of it for thousands of times.My wife always threatens to leave me if I couldn’t reduce my weight.阿三：You want? Speak up if you want!Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity, I’m very glad, you still have to speak up.Take it!Do you really like? Really?你不是真的想要吧？难道你真的想要吗……（《No matter》音乐起，荆轲先与阿三跳探戈，拥入怀中，又甩出去，阿三做呕吐状。然后荆轲与太子丹跳伦巴，最后太子丹摆一个女性化的造型，向后弯腰并抬其中一条腿，荆轲做调戏状。）

荆柯(诚恳状)Just tell me what should I do? I will do anything for you.太子丹与阿三（撞胯，击掌）Yeah!

Action Ш（《大话西游》主题曲响起）

荆珂挽着妻子，太子丹,阿三在后.阿三：Hero, we have already reached Yishui River.荆珂：Just stop here, please.Farewell, my friends 太子丹：I will miss you, baby.（太子丹，阿三下。停顿。《泰坦尼克号》主题曲起，荆轲与妻子做Jack和rose在船头的经典造型，忽然荆轲看到一个美女——此时一个中国古典美女经过，向荆轲抛媚眼，并抛下定情手绢。荆轲高兴的盯着美女看，妻子发觉不对，扭过头来。）荆珂（急忙收敛）：Darling, I love you.妻子：I love you!You mean more to me than anything in this whole world!（《肖申克的救赎》）荆珂(流泪)：I love you more.In spite of you and me and the whole silly world going to pieces around us, I love you.(哪怕是世界末日我都会爱着你，选自《飘》)妻子：Well.Be a man, just do it!I will be right here waiting for you.荆珂（欲走还留，执子之手又曰）：Sweetheart!You must do me this honor...promise me you will survive...that you will never give up...no matter what happens...no matter how hopeless...promise me now, and never let go of that promise（泰坦尼克号沉船时，Jack对Rose的倾诉）.妻子:“I promise.” 荆轲:“Never let go.“

妻子:”I promise.I will never let go, Jack.I'll never let go."（荆轲的发音和jack很像，所以加了一些《泰坦尼克号》的台词。）妻子努力挤出几滴眼泪，荆珂上船，渐渐远去

妻子：It’s a good day to die.Never come back.Never…… Never……

妻子(掏出手机拨号，阿三接手机)： Thank you very much.As soon as I get the life assurance $1000, 000, I will transfer half of it, $500,000 to your account.阿三：Okay okay!旁白：Then Jingke was sent to Qin and finally killed by Yingzheng.The End