2016年中考作文分析

第一篇：2016年中考作文分析

2016年河南省中招语文试卷作文题目解析

1、题目：我的青春里有——

2、材料：

画家费尽心力创作了一幅画，在即将完成时，不小心将一桶滴油墨滴在画上，他沮丧极了，想要放弃这幅画，冷静下来后，他反复变转角度看那个墨迹，随后，在墨迹上涂了几笔，墨迹变成了一只飞鸟，与整幅画完美融合。

点评题目一：我的青春里有——

这个作文题是很常规的记叙文，还是写人写事的文章，也是学生常写的话题，可以补充填上自己认为较容易写的内容。如补上“自信”、“坚强”等词语，有的考生往往填上一些消极、不健康的内容，给半命题作文带来了一些负面作用，自然也降低了作文的品位。如考生在横线上填了“打麻将”、“抽烟”、“喝酒”等词语，让人瞠目结舌，甚为困惑。因此，写作时不能凭一时的感情冲动，或是标新立异，填写上一些消极、不健康的内容，而应填写积极向上，反映青少年时代风貌的健康内容。

也不要把题目拟得过大，难以写出情真意切的佳作来。如果把题目补为《我的青春里有大自然》、《我的青春里有名著》，对于这样大的题目，文章容易写得空泛、笼统，难以写出真情实感。所以，在补题的时候尽量把题目具体化，贴近自己的生活实际。

点评题目二：材料作文

首先需要审题。从立意上看，我们认为以下几种立意属于准确地理解材料，应判切合题意，内容项在一档打分。

(一)人要从不利走向有利，就要依靠自己永不放弃的精神。

(二)人要从失误的阴影中走出来，就需要聪明过人的智慧、灵活变通地思维、高超绝妙的技艺。

(三)成功往往有其偶然性，但更有其必然性。

其中

（一）（二）两点可同时采用，也可从任意一个或几个角度立意。

以下几种立意属于较准确地理解材料，应判符合题意，内容项在二档打分。

(一)做人不能被失误打倒。

(二)要战胜困难才能成功。

(三)挫折不可怕，战胜挫折才能成功。

这几类立意只是抓住了材料的表面现象，而没有深入理解裁缝成功的根本原因，因此在内容只评为二类。

以下立意属于对材料的理解存在一点偏差，应判基本符合题意，内容项在三档打分。

(一)创新塑造成功。

(二)天生我材必有用。

其次是确定题材。个人认为这则材料作文写成议论文好写些。

相关材料：

一位裁缝在吸烟时不小心将一条高档裙子烧了一个窟窿这，致使其成了废品。这位裁缝为了挽回损失，凭借其高超的技艺，在裙子四周剪了许多窟窿，并精心饰以金边，然后，将其取名为“金边凤尾裙”。不但卖了好价钱，还一传十，十传百，使不少女士上门求购，生意十分红火。

第二篇：中考作文分析

九年级中考作文指导

典型例句 1.one +of + 形容词最高级+ 名词复数One of the biggest events in China in 2008 is that the earthquake happened in WenChuan.2.It's our duty to do sthIt's our duty to help them.3.As….as possibleWe shoud help them as much as possible.4.here be...Here are lots of things we can do.5.We shoud keep calm instead of being afraid.6.make +sb+ 形容词It makes many people homeless.7.too …..to They are too young to look after themselves

一、健康问题（热点）健康问题是中考常考的话题，出题形式多样，有必要下苦功掌握。典型例句 1.It is very important to keep healthy。2.How can we keep healthy?3.We can't go to sleep too late.We can't get up too late。

4.We should eat the food healthily。5.We should do more exercise。6.Last Tuesday I got a cold and had a pain in my head。

7.I didn't feel like eating anything。8.I decided to see the doctor。9.In the doctor's office, the doctor looks over me carefully。

10.The doctor asked me to take the medicine three times a day。

11.A few days later, I felt better.From then on I believe that keeping healthy is the most important thing in the world。例文

1、简要介绍一下如何才能保持健康，并展开想象，适当发挥。参考答案： All of us want to be healthy.First，we should get enough sleep during the night.We can go to bed early and get up early.Staying up late is bad for our health.Second, we must have the right kinds of food.We should eat more fruit and vegetables and less meat.We should drink a lot of water.We should have healthy eating habits.Third, we should do more exercise to build up our bodies.Finally, we should wash hands before meals and brush our teeth twice a day.If we don’t feel well, we should go to see the doctor at once.2.卫生健康饮食:健康一直是人们关注的问题我校要举行以“关爱健康”为题的主题班会,写一篇80字左右的演讲槁。保持健康的重要性，保持健康的方法，保持健康的结论，1.多吃水果蔬菜保持饮食平衡避免含糖高脂肪高的食物2.多锻炼健身强体;3.鄙弃不良习惯，(你的看法?)，How to stay our health /fit?范文 Dear boys and girls :

Here is my advice about how to keep health? Today many teenagers are unhealthy，because they do less exercise eat more junk food isn’t enough time to sleep.If we keep fit we must keep taking exercises every day.Eat lots of fruit and vegetables.Sleep for about 8 hours a night.Stay away from drugs.Early to bed early to get up.Breathe the fresh air in the open air.you’d better do more exercise such as playing ball games running swimming and jumping rope(绳子).Then you should pay attention to your diet or meals，Don’t eat too much meat and sugar but more vegetables and fruit.Third you need enough sleep or rest.Next，keep yourself happy.As people often say smiling makes younger.Last you mustn’t drink wine or

smoke.They are bad for your health.Keep happy every day.That is my advice.I hope you are healthy and enjoy your life.3、根据中英文提示，写出内容完整、意思连贯、符合逻辑的稿件。有写学生不爱吃学校的午饭，常到校外去吃他们所喜欢吃的食物。但有些食物并不利于他们的身体健康。请你准备一篇讨论稿，谈谈你的看法和建议。范文：We know that some of our students do not like eating lunch at school because the food isn’t delicious.So they often go out of school to buy something they like to eat.But I’m afraid it’s bad for their health to eat lunch outside because some of the food they buy isn’t healthy enough.In my opinion, if our schools want more students to be back and enjoy lunch inside, they should make the food more delicious, and also they should offer our students a larger choice of food as well.二、关于环境保护问题（热点）环境保护问题是中考热门话题，难度较大，必须掌握。典型句子 1.It’s our duty to save wate 2.As we know , water is very important to man,3.we can’t live without water.4.But some people don’t care about it.5.The amount of water which is suitable to drink is less and less.6.Many rivers and lakes are polluted.Something must be done to stop the pollution.7.It's our duty to protect our environment。

8.It is very important to take care of our environment

9.We shouldn’t throw litter on to the ground10.We should not spit in a public place11.We should plant more flowers and trees。

12.We must pick up some rubbish and throw it into a dustbin

13.If everyone makes contribution to protecting the environment, the world will become much more beautiful。14.Trees are very helpful and important for us.15.We should plant more and more trees in order to live better and more healthy in the future.It’s everyone’s duty to love and protect the environment.、6月5日(June 5)是世界环境保护日，我们周围的环境变得越来越糟糕，污染越来越严重„„。假如你是学生Jone.，你校要进行“如何保护我们的环境?”演讲比赛，要求：

1、举例说明环境存在的问题

2、如何保护好我们的环境，采取怎样的措施，举例说明，字数80左右。Dear headmasters,teachers,classmates and friends:

I’m very proud that I have chosen to speak to you all today, I’m a bit nervous as I’ve never made a speech before to so many people ,so please forgive me if it shows.As we all know,the environmemt around us is getting worse and worse.In some places we can’t see fish swimming in the river or trees on the hills.Some people even have no clean water to drink.So I think we must do something to protect the environment..But what can we do? How to protect our environmemt ?For example ,we can go to school on foot or by bike.we can use shopping basskets not plastic bags.when we go shopping and we can use both sides of the paper when we write.In a word ,if everyone pays more attention to our environment ,there will be

less pollution and our life will be better.“There is only one earth”,I hope everyone will protect our environment well.Thanks!

4、保护环境。从2008年6月1日起，国家将禁止商家免费提供塑料袋，掀起全国“拒塑”的环保运动。假如你是李华，准备以“What Can We Do for the Environment”为题，写一篇保护环境的英语演讲稿。参考作文：What Can We Do for the EnvironmentHello, everyone.I’m Li Hua.It’s nice to speak about what we can do for the environment, and I think each of us can do a little bit to help with this problem.The first thing we can do is to use cloth bags in stead of plastic bags when we go shopping.It helps to protect the environment.The second thing we can do is to reuse the old textbooks as possible as we can.We should also never forget to turn off the lights when we leave the classrooms in order to save energy.What’s more, it would be better if we walk or ride a bike to school.We should try our best reduce pollution and waste.In fact, even the simplest everyday activities can make a real difference to the environment.I believe we can make the world a better place to live in.Thank you for your listening!

5.环境问题：今天环境变得越来越糟糕,环境问题影响着人们的工作,学习,生活等,而我们的工作,生活,生产等又使环境污染越来越严重..,如何保护我们的环境?请以“ How to protect/save our environment/world? ”为题写一篇短文。提示:存在问题:1.水污染越来越严重2.砍伐森林严重3.大气污染严重 4.白色垃圾等。要求：如何改善/保护环境? 80字左右的。范文： How to protect/save our environment/world?

The environmental pollutionis worse and worse /more and more seriouslytoday.Water is polluted ,we have nocleanwater todrinkMany trees are cutting down, some animals is getting less and less.Somefactories is poring dirtyair in the sky , the populationis increasing faster and faster ,resources is getting less and less…etc.Not only does it affect our lives and health, it also has a greataffectionin thefuture.people's health has been greatly affected by air, noise and water pollution.Many people died of diseases.In order to live a better life, we need protect ourworld.We shouldn’t throw away rubbish everywhere.We want to recycle ,reduce ,reusethings.Don’t waste things ,This saves money and reduces pollution.Use things for as long as possible.We don’t useplastic bags.We must plant more trees and stop the people cutting them.We hopeour world is more andmore beautiful.6.为了保护地球有限的资源，我们应该采取什么措施呢？请根据下面的提示写一篇约80词的短文，短文开头已经给出。提示词；1.save water, the source of life , protect drinking water, stop polluting, make full use of it；2.save electricity, crucial, turn off, other electric machines；3.save forests, useful ,stop cutting down；4.recycle useful rubbish, save resources 参考作文：

Although the world develops much faster and better, the resources on the earth get fewer and fewer.In order to protect them, something must be done.Save water.Water is the source of life.No water, no life.So it’s very important for us to do so.Not only should we protect drinking water and stop polluting it, but also make full use of it.Save electricity.It is crucial.We can’t imagine what the life will be like without it.Everyone should do his best to save electricity.Don’t forget to turn off lights or other electric machines when we finish working.Save forests.They are useful.Please stop cutting them down and use recycled paper instead.Make our world a green one to live in.Recycle useful rubbish.Plenty of rubbish can be recycled like cans, paper, bottles, and so on.We can save resources in this way.三、语言学习,这是中考中的老话题，形式多样。典型例句 1.My favorite subject is English。2.More than three quarters of the information on the Internet is in English。3.It is used by travelers and business people all over the world。

4.China has joined the WTO and the Olympic Games will be held in China.English becomes more and more useful。

5.So English is very important and I like English very much。6.We have a lot of fun in the English class。

7.Our English teacher often makes us happy in the English class。

8.I hope I can go abroad one day, and then I can speak to foreigners in English。9.I like English and try my best to learn it。

例文Ellen看到大家都对自己的未来充满期待，感到特别高兴。为了鼓励大家学好英语，他准备出一期英语学习经验交流专刊。请根据以下问题和答案的提示并结合你的实际情况，以“My English Learning”为题写一篇80词左右的英文稿件，要求至少涉及其中的三个问题，并且不能出现你的真实姓名、校名和县名等。提示： When did you start learning English?(in „ /„years ago)How do you learn English?(listen carefully, study with a group, read English every day…)What is difficult to learn?(listening, grammar…)What other helpful ways do you know to learn English well?(watch English movies, sing English songs…)参考作文： English is one of my best subjects and I started learning English when I was ten years old.But at the very beginning, listening seemed a little difficult for me.So I have been doing a lot of listening practice, such as listening to tapes, watching English TV programs.And I found it really helped a lot.In fact, there are some more helpful ways to learn English well.For example, I enjoy singing English songs and I want to join an English club or find a pen pal from English-speaking countries.I believe that nothing is impossible if you put your heart into it.2、假设你叫李华，你的英国笔友Linda为了来中国参观奥运会而报名参加汉语培训班学习汉语。她最近写信向你询问学习外语的建议。请根据提示和你学习英语的体会给Linda写一封回信。注意:1．回信要包括全部要点；2．开头和结尾已给出,不计入总词数 3．字数60左右。参考作文： Dear Linda，I’m very glad that you’ll come to China to watch the Olympic Games.I know it isn’t

easy to learn a foreign language, but I have some ideas that may help.Firstly, it’s very important to listen to the teacher carefully in class and make some notes so that you can go over your lessons later.Secondly, try to catch every chance to practice speaking, both in and out of class.Don’t be afraid of making mistakes.Then try to listen and read more in Chinese.What’s more, you’d better plan your time well and study it regularly every day.Above all, you should be confident in yourself and don’t give up whenever you meet with difficulty.I’m sure you will succeed through your hard work.Best wishes and looking forward to meeting you in China.Yours,Li Hua

四、兴趣与爱好（热点）兴趣爱好是中考常考话题，1、介绍你的兴趣爱好My HobbyI am a 15-year-old student in junior Grade 3.Though I am occupied with my study, I would like to spend time on my hobbies, such as playing the piano, surfing the Internet.One of my favourite hobby is reading.Reading has been in my life for many years, since I began to learn characters.It can not only kill the time, but also, more important, help improve my comprehension ability.When reading, I can learn a lot.Reading Shakespear's works, I know how Hamlet looks like.Reading Scorates, I can see how great ancient Greek philosophers are.Reading Lu Xu, I come back to the old time of China.Reading really affect my life.2、我的爱好（My hobby）Choose one of your hobbies and write an article for the school magazine about it.Tell the magazine readers.•What exactly your hobby is;•When and how you became interested in this hobby;•Why you enjoy your hobby;•About your hopes and plans for the future.写作要求： 1.根据所提供的内容，适当拓展想象空间，灵活地将提供的信息体现在文章中。2.条理清楚，语句通顺，书写清晰、规范。3.词数60-80.My hobby is reading books When I was seven years old.I became interested in reading books.I like needing books because there are a lot of useful things in books.I can learn a lot of knowledge from books.Bookscan also teach me how to be a good person.Books even can solve many problems for me.I will read more good books to improve myself.五、写人记事篇 ,这是中考出项频率最高的话题，其特点是难度相对较小，学生都有话可写，但掌握一些基本句子和模仿范文对夺取高分非常必要。典型例句

1.His name is Jack。2.He was born in London in 1982。

3.He is 1.68 meters tall and weighs 52 kilos。4.He is 20 years old。5.He comes from England。6.He is a good ping-pong player。7.He is medium build。8.He has short hair。

9.He is outgoing.Every one likes to talk with him.He gets on well with us。

10.He teaches English very well.11.He works hard.He works in No.5 Middle School。12.He loves watching football games after work。13.He often helps me with my English。14.At the age of six, he began to play football

例文

1、假如你是李华，你从报纸上看到2008北京奥运会志愿者的招聘广告。请你用英文写封

简短的应聘信，介绍自己的情况（见下表）表示愿意为奥运会做一些工作，请组委会给予考虑，并能尽早予以答复，词数：80左右。姓名：李华，年龄： 16。简历 ： 我市某中学学生。爱好 ：绘画、体育、唱歌、演讲、英语口语。获奖情况 ：2007年12月获我市中学生英语演讲比赛一等奖 身体状况：健康。联系电话： 0594--1356666。提示词汇：1.志愿者voluteer2.作为work as3.答复reply to4.比赛contest

Sir/Madam,I read your ad.in the newspaper yesterday.I’m writing to tell you that I’d like to work as a volunteer for the 2008 Beijing Olympics.My name is Li Hua.I’m sixteen.I have many hobbies, such as drawing, sports, singing, speeches, and spoken English.I am proud that I won the first prize in our city’s English Speech Contest for Middle School Student in December, 2007.In fact I’m healthy and strong.If I am lucky enough to become a volunteer, I will try my best to do this job well.Please reply to me soon.My telephone number is 0594—1356666.Yours sincerely

Li Hua3.、回顾初中三年成长过程，你一定有很多感受，从学习，生活，爱好等方面作出自我评价(毕业 回顾评价)I have studied in my middle school for three years.I have learned a lot.I have learned not only how to make friends but also how to talk to others.I have many hobbies.I like sports.I often play basketball, football and volleyball with my friends.Football is my favorite.Of all my subjects, I do best in English and Chinese.But my math and physics are a little weak.I think I will try my best to learn them well.I hope I can study in No.1 High School.旅游和介绍地方篇（热点）中考高频率话题，出题形式灵活。典型例句

1.Last Sunday(Saturday,…),it was sunny(rainy, windy, foggy,)

2.I got up very early(late).After breakfast I went to „with my friends by bike 3.We enjoyed ourselves。4.We forgot the time.We didn't come back until 5 o'clock。5．Wefelt very tired, but we were happy6.I thought I would never forget this trip。7.Last summer, my parents and I went to Beijing for our holidays。8.We visited a lot of places of interest。9.We had a good time there。10.We bought a lot of things.The clothes here are good and cheap。

4、请你用英语为刘公岛写一篇题为Welcome to Liu Gong Island 的旅游宣传材料。要点： 刘公岛概况威海东部，岛长4.08km，宽1.5km, 面积：3.15km2, 距陆地船程20 分钟，花草树木覆盖，历史博物馆、动物园等景点，水、陆环岛游等活动 交通方式 ：（来威海）汽车、火车、飞机等，交通便利。浏览时间： 一天 ,要求：1.包括以上要点，但不拘泥于其顺序，适当使用描绘性语言，展示刘公岛魅力。2.词数100 词左右（已给出的开头、结尾不计入词数）。Welcome to Liu Gong Island

The summer vacation is coming.Where would you like to visit? Haven’t you decided?

Come to Liu Gong Island!Liu Gong Island is in the east of Weihai, which has an area of 3.15km2.It is 4.08 km long, 1.5km wide.It will take you 20 minutes to get the island from the travel port by ship.The history museum on the island is educational.The zoo is interesting to visit.And it is more interesting to travel around the island either on land or by boat.There are all kinds of trees and grass everywhere.It’s very easy to travel to Weihai.You can come by bus, by train, or by plane.You can spend a day happily on the island.It is a good place to visit.Visitors from all over the world come to visit it every year.Wish you a good trip.六、新生事物评价（热点），需要学生掌握方法，和基本句式，以做到考试时心中不乱。典型例句 1.Computer is becoming more and more important

2.we should make good use of it.3.It maybe get in the way of our study.4.We can do lots of things with it。5.It makes our life more easy

6.Nowadays mobile phones are becoming more and more popular among the middle school students.例文

1、网上购物Doing Shopping Online

With the help of the Internet, shopping is not a difficult job.Just click your mouse to choose the article you like, and the shopping is finished.You needn't step out of the room.It seems easy and quick.But there's always a trap online.If you are careless, it will bring you some trouble.You may find the color of the article is different from what you want, or the size is either too small or too big.If you want to be different, you'd better not buy clothes online.Once you put on the clothes you bought online and go out, you will find many people wear the same clothes in the street.2、关于中学生使用手机 赞成意见：1.现在是信息社会，手机是最快的信息交流工具之一。2.应充分利用好手机。如偶遇突发事故，可立即拨打手机求助。3.可在每天学习之余利用手机游戏放松一下自己。4.只要正确使用好手机，紧跟时间并无过错，追求时尚可以理解，但学习是首要任务。反对意见：1.学校已提供了公共电话，因此手机并不能带来更多的方便，而且花费较多。2.若课堂接听手机会影响上课。3.学生玩手机游戏或接发短信，将无法集中精力学习。注意：1.可适当增加细节和连接词，使文章通顺连贯；开头部分已给出，不计入总词数；2.词数：80左右；参考作文：

Nowadays mobile phones are becoming more and more popular among the middle school students.In my opinion, we can bring mobile phones to school.As we know, the 21st century is a modern age and full of information.A mobile phone is one of the quickest tools for us to exchange information.The mobile phone is a fashionable and useful invention, so we ought to make the best use of it.Suppose there’s a sudden accident, it is more convenient for us to dial for help immediately.There’re also some games in the mobile phone.We can relax ourselves by playing them when we’re tired of our studies.In my opinion, it’s not wrong to follow the fashion, but the most important thing is how to use the mobile phone in a right way.1.我的梦想是当一名医生(my dream is doctor)： I am an ordinary person, I have an ordinary dream: Is a doctor.Because doctor may let these experience personally the human which the indisposition suffers to get rid of the pain.May let the human change the health.At the same time, I believed that, will help others, own also to be able to obtain joyfully.Therefore, I hoped future I might be a doctor.2.以后十年内我的生活(MY LIFE IN TEN YEARS)In ten years,I think I 'll be a reporter.I wiil live in an apartement with my sister.Because I don't like living alone.And I can play with her inth aparement.So in ten years,I willba a good reporter.I will meet a lot of interesting and faous people and I willgo to another places on business.In ten years,i will have many different pets.Maybe I will keep a pet turtle.I think I will go shopping with my sister as long as I have time.And I will go to london on my vacation.So,my life in ten years will be better and better!

七、烦恼篇 这类作文难度较大，掌握基本句式，背诵范文非常必要。典型例句

1.I am sorry to hear that……2.you shoud learn to forget…… 3.you had better……4 you shoud learn to relax5.you can ask your teacher for help例文，假如你是Han Mei, 下面是一封你的笔友Alice 给你发来的e-mail,请你根据e-mail 的内容给她写一封回信，与她交流看法，并帮她排忧解难。提示词语：listen to, mother's love, care about, communicate with, get along with, smileDear Han Mei,I'm afraid I've got a big problem recently.My mother talks too much to me.She always tells me, “Be careful while crossing the street.” “Put on more clothes.” “Did you do a good job at school?” and so on.I'm annoyed(烦恼)。What shall I do?AliceDear Alice,As a teenager, I met the same problem as you.But now I can get along better with my mother.Here are some ideas for you.Your mother talks much, because she cares about you.Maybe it's not a good way, but it shows your mother's love.So I think you should listen to her.If your opinions are different from your mother's, you can communicate with her, and tell her what you are thinking about.If your mother doesn't take your advice, just keep silent and give her a smile.I hope what I say here can help you a lot.

第三篇：中考作文分析

作文库大全小升初 中考满分 高考满分 高考零分 2013广西南宁中考作文分析【真题点击】作文。（50分）亲爱的同学，十年后的你，会是啥样？能否成为最好的自己？去问问你的人生际遇，兴趣爱好，更要去问问你的青春志向，和你为之付出的青春汗水„„请从下面两道作文题中，任选一题，完成作文。题一：以“十年后，与最好的自己相遇”为题，写一篇作文。题二：以“致十年后的自己”为题，写一封信。要求：（1）文中不能出现真实的人名、校名和地名。写信一律称自己为“宁宁”。（2）除诗歌外，文体不限，字数在600字以上。（3）选择题二，要符合书信格式。【真题破解】2013年继续沿用了二选一的模式，但都是命题作文。这样的考题，一是考学生对人生的规划，二是考查学生的想像力，三是选材空间大。这个作文题是对未来的一种设计，紧扣“中国梦”，是对未来自己的期许，属于青春励志教育类。两个文题相似，但《十年后与最好的自己相遇》是站在未来的角度，去写一个未来的自己，而《致十年后的自己》则是站在现在的角度，写信给未来的自己，落脚点有所不同。如果审题不仔细，将前一个题目落在现在的自己要如何努力，很可能会写偏题。这两个作文题虽然让学生有话可说，但很容易写得散、写虚，真正写好也并不容易。尤其是《致十年后的自己》，写信便于抒情，但不易突出中心思想，并且要求按书信的格式，把自己称为“宁宁”，如果学生写信的格式不对，也会被扣分。总之这个文题就是要学生大胆想像，漫无边际，可以联系生活，也可以借助事物，表达情感。甭管是奇思还是异想，不管是不是合理，只要能自圆其说即可。写给十年后的自己李兴海李兴海：你好！这个书面问候，使我想了很久。我不知道自己是该写展信佳呢，还是该写hello，直到深夜躺在床上，才忽然决定用“你好”这个传统而又老套的礼貌用语。我之所以用这个老套的词语，无非是想看看，此刻的你是否还如我现在一般桀骜叛逆，敢于摒弃一切老套的封建词句。我的文学老师说，当你看到这封信时，你一定会捧腹大笑，继而禁不住热泪盈眶。我想，他是错的，毕竟，我们还没那么矫情。你知道吗？我有多渴望长大。现在才凌晨一点钟，母亲就来催了三次，问我明天还想不想上学。你看，我的生活就是这样，不但一塌糊涂，还总是被家长和老师们所禁锢。你现在还喜欢看书写字吗？还是不是每次写作文都要把后半部分一直扩展到试卷背面？数学成绩是不是依旧烂得惨不忍睹？还敢不敢在大街上唱歌？还会不会无视学校规定，自己给自己放假？这些问题，其实都不是我最想要问的。我最想知道的答案，就是现在你有没有结婚，以及结婚的对象是不是冉冰洁？你不知道我有多喜欢冉冰洁，但我想，她一定不会喜欢我。我现在那么矮，那么丑，成绩那么差，除非有一天我长高了，变帅了，成为一名优秀的作家了，她才有可能接受我。我给她写了一封情书，但迟迟没有邮寄出去。我生怕这封热情洋溢的信件，会让我爱情 友情两者同失。因此，我想问问十年后的你，那封信，此刻去了哪里？它有没有帮你博得冉冰洁的倾慕？还有啊，要是你真没和冉冰洁结婚的话，就不用给我回信了。天知道，我收到这个消息之后会干出什么傻事儿来。前几天我还和我的死党发誓呢，要是我娶不到冉冰洁的话，下半辈子就给他做牛做马。如果你现在还有和这个死党联系的话，趁早断了吧，免得他哪日心血来潮忽然想起这个誓言，并且执意要你兑现。你有没有去普罗旺斯？千万别告诉我，十年后的你尚且没有去过普罗旺斯。那是我现在最大最大的梦想。听说，那里有全世界最广袤的薰衣草种植基地，每逢春夏，便会漫山遍野地绽开紫色的薰衣草，无边无际，把天上的每一只昆虫都熏染得浑身附带着浓烈的香气。还有，我要告诉你一个秘密。在学校背后的西山上面，有一棵千年子母树，子母树的旁边有一块巨大的望山石，我把这些年写的日记都埋在了望山石的脚下，如果你还能找到它们的话，就当我送给你的礼物吧。最后，我想问你一个问题。长大后的你，真的幸福吗？快乐吗？ 【得分点透视】1.捕捉细节，才思敏捷。全文取材于自己的真实生活，从身边具体的事件写起，妙趣横生，才华横溢。比如问未来的自己初恋是否成功，情书到哪里去了，有没有去过普罗旺斯等，显得才思机智，幽默风趣。2.真情实感，言之有物。在与未来的自己对话时，作者没有泛泛而谈，而是把那个未

来的自己当作多年未见的老朋友，仿佛他就坐在自己对面，作者像久别重逢一样地与之交流，侃侃而谈，从称呼，到想像中对方收到信的情景，到一连串的个人问题，描写细致入微，生动有趣。有一天，我走在一条幽静的小路上，当我正在为还有太多的作业没有完成而烦恼时，一股无形的力量把我向后吸了过去。我连连倒退三步，赶忙抓住路边的一棵小树，怎奈那力量实在太强了，我渐渐感到力不从心。只听“咔嚓”一声，小树被折断了，断了的树枝重重的敲在了我的头上，我顿时眼前一黑，便失去了知觉。不知过了多久，我终于醒来了。我发现自己躺在了一条马路上，一名报童正对着我笑。“要买报吗？”报童问我。“买。”我便掏钱买了一份报纸，一看报上的时间，我不禁吓了一跳——2009年12月25日，我顿时懵了。难道我穿越时空了，来到了2019年的世界？再看一眼报纸，让我更为吃惊。“伟大的科学家何涵春首次开启了时空隧道，并解开了恐龙之谜”。何涵春？这不是我的名字吗》难道十年后的我成了科学家？种种疑问顿时涌上心头。强烈的好奇心驱使我去找这位与我同名同姓的伟大人物。经过一番努力，我们终于见面了。在他了解了我的情况后，急忙跑下来迎接，还抱着我说：“你就是十年前的我呀！我正想着去十年前接你呢，谁料到你会掉进时空黑洞啊！你现在要好好学习，刻苦钻研，长大后才能成为像我这样伟大的科学家。”听着他对我的期望，再回过头看看自己对学习的态度——作业不认真写，还老是偷懒，我感到羞愧万分，当即立志要成为一名伟大的科学家。之后，我还参观了他的实验室。啊！真是太漂亮了，科学用具应有尽有。看着那富丽堂皇的实验室，我越来越想当一名科学家了。最后，他把我送回了家。到家后，我认真的完成了作业，并努力地向科学家一步步迈进！遇见十年后的自己我是一个爱做梦的人，在心理课堂的引导下，我正畅游于那个脱离现实的世界里。如果遇见了十年后的自己„„我会和“他”一起沿田野散步，迎着沁人的花香、草香„„享受着凉爽的清风，向“自己”追问着“自己”。“在未来对我过得好吗？生活怎么样，有考上一所名牌大学吗？有没有一位善良、美丽的妻子„„”我想把这十年内可能发生的事情全部问了个遍。他看着我：“也许我来是为了满足你的好奇心，其实不然，我是来告诉你，未来的路坎坷却又宽阔。当你失望时，其实就能看见希望。要相信自己，要幸福快乐，不要气馁，做一个有灵魂、有思想的人。另外，我也想来休息一下，放松 放松。”我和他又沉默地走在这田野间，迎着微风，闻着清香。„„我是个爱幻想的人。如果遇见十年后的自己，我会询问梦想是否会成功；如果遇见十年后的自己，我会仔细端详“自己”的面容；如果遇见十年后的自己，我会什么也不说，只和他静静散步于田野间„„我的梦想，不需要十年后自己的告知，只要从这一刻起，脚踏实地的去实现“它”——我的人生，我的梦想！致十年后的我时光匆匆而过，孩童时的童真就这样度过，当初那十五岁的小女生如今已长大 了，成熟了，懂事了。她学会了承担，她有了奋斗的目标，而这些，似乎就只在眨眼之间。嗨！十年后的我，初次对你写信，我的心情是无法用我那贫乏的语言来表达的，是很复杂的，有些兴奋，有期待，又有些害怕。我有好多好多的问题想问你，有许多许多的话语无法用语言来表达„„。十年后的我，你现在过的怎么样呢？幸福吗？你是否还坚持着十年前那成为漫画家，小说家的梦想？这个梦想在十年后有实现了吗？还是早已经将它遗忘了呢？只是有了一份平平凡凡的工作，过着平平淡淡的日子？更不会是在哪场考试中落榜，上不了大学而正不知如何是好的寻找工作，过着穷苦潦倒的生活呢？爸妈们还好吗？你有让他们过上好的生活，健健康康的吗？他们还如十年前这般的年轻与高大吗？还是已经是白发苍苍了呢？十年的时间，足以改变太多太多了，这十年间你可曾因为当初的某个决定而后悔过。因为当初的那次贪玩儿懊恼过？还是遇见了什么改变了你一生的事？对这些的答案我都十分的期待，可在这期待中同样隐藏着一份害怕与不安。害怕从你口中蹦不拿一件件不如意的事。十年前的你，对自己的未来充满了迷惑与困惑，虽然心中有个小小的理想，可对这个理想摇摆不定，有着冲向理想时的害

怕„。还记得吗？十年前你的梦想是成为个漫画家，小说家。十年前的你对这个理

想充满了渴望，却又害怕，害怕自己冲向这个理想后的失败。害怕作品没被选上后 的后悔„。我对未来的一切的一切充满了迷漫，就像船儿在海上，茫茫大雾中航行，找不着方向。我希

望这时候有个罗盘，来告诉我正确的方向，带着我在大雾中航行，直至找到出口，抵达终点。十年后的我，你能告诉我该怎么办吗？来当我的罗盘，指引我前进的方向。十年后的我，在如今，你回想起儿时那一件件在那时看起来很大的烦恼，如今是否觉得甚是渺小，想起十年前的某些举动，如今是否会觉得甚是好笑十年后的我，你可还记得我们在十年前定下的那个约定？如今，你可有再遇过当初的那些同学与老师？那些当初让你恨得牙痒痒的某个同学，某些事，现在回想起来是否会觉得风清云淡。时光飞逝，人生路漫漫„„。

你还好吗？十年后的我2013年4月15日叶儿随风飘落，黄色的栀子花缓缓落下，在空中飞荡，十年后的我，

第四篇：2016济南中考作文分析

2016年济南中考作文题目浅析

硝烟已尽，中考落幕。一场牵动几万家庭的考试大战在喧嚣中结束。本次中考，可谓“几家欢喜几家忧”。语文考试作文没有用考前样题中的“题目+开头”的形式，让不少同学舒了一口气。但《共度好时光》这个题目真的那么简单吗？今天我们来看一下。

1、《共度好时光》这个题目，是我们考前讲解的五大类题目中的“动宾短语”题目。这类题目在写作之前，首先要注意写作对象的确定：和谁/什么共度好时光？选材的方向不仅仅局限在写人上，我们备考的特长爱好、故乡、游历、小人物等文章都可以转化。这个“共度”的对象，可以说是没有太大的限制。

2、许多同学只是简单的一分析和谁共度之后，就开始将自己的备考作文套用。这是不对的。这篇文章的题目虽然简单，但是有潜在的限制。因为我们要关注“怎么样”共度？是写一个时间段的刻画？是写几个小画面连缀？还是写眼前引回忆再回忆......将共度的形式和意义写出来，是这篇文章与其他同学写出区别的一个主要的点。例如我们可以写自己的爱好（书法），这里可以写这样一个过程：初识之时兴趣盎然，开始一段美好时光——慢慢相知，时光都变成了氤氲着墨香的时光——深入了解，墨香不仅仅带来成就、荣誉，更让你的情怀得到升华，这美好的时光，必将成为你成长的美丽风景。

3、“好时光”的要求很明显，要形成一个完整的画面。但这里一定要注意，“好时光”明显不是一个简单的时间点，它是包含了时间、地点、人物的面的刻画。而且这里的“好时光”含义不要人为的变窄了——什么是好？感动、温暖是好，成长变化是好，温馨舒适是好。助人为乐是好，沉浸于宁静快乐是好，知错能改是好，陪伴相助是好，游览大好河山是好，轻抚琴弦是好，绿茵场上驰骋也是好......不要简单地把“好”等同于快乐温暖。否则选材撞车的可能性太大。

4、这里要统一一种认识：中考作文题目越是简单，得分区分度就越小。同水平的同学很难拉开档次。那么，完全围绕着考场优秀作文的标准写一篇优秀的作文就成了摆在同学们面前的一大难题。精益求精成了作文中考备考的一个重要的提升点。建议同学们，尤其是初三衔接的同学们仔细审视自己的文章，找到自己作文问题，做好文章修改、备考！

假期，阴老师和你相约！共同备考作文！明年中考，必胜！

老师

.06.20

阴2016

第五篇：2013济南中考作文分析

初一期末考试作文分析

一、中考作文分析《定格在记忆中的画面》

1、关键词分析：

（1）“定格”——这是一个限定，说明我们写作的事件在我们的记忆中影响深刻，就像相机的镜头拍摄照片一样清晰，一样难忘。同时，“定格”一词也从侧面表现出我们文中应该有对这个事件的细致刻画，只有细致，才能难以忘怀。

（2）“记忆”——这是对文体的一个提示，提示我们写的是一篇回忆性的文章，可以是记忆中的亲情、友谊、师生情、人间真情、自然美景后的感悟、一种寄托在某个事物中的回忆（月光）等。可以用“触景生情引出回忆”的方法开头，可以用题记开头，可以用“先声夺人”的声音开头。

（3）“画面”——很明显提醒我们写作中应该有画面的描写，即“环境+人物+抒情”，巧妙地运用修辞，将上述三者完美的融合在一起。既然是画面，那么我们展现的就应该是一个能够触动我们的事件，在这个事件中，如诗如画、让人行动的某个场景深深的触动了我们的心灵。在这里，不要忘记感情的变化，一篇没有情感及其变化过程的文章，不能成为一篇好的考场作文，多层次、多角度、多次出现心理活动的描写，才能写出真正的在脑海中记忆深刻的画面。

2、选材的新角度

（1）可以写一件家庭生活中的小事，凸显亲情：今年中考的特殊性，它是在端午节当天开始考试，那么，我们是不是可以将端午节早上出门时母亲或者父亲特定的一个画面写出来呢，比如那《悠悠的粽香》，比如那为我祈福的艾草（以前从未插过艾草的母亲，今年却插了艾草，我并不喜欢它的味道，直到出门时，才从母亲口中得知她的目的，母亲那温馨的眼神，定格在了我的脑海之中），比如那一丝不苟的、虔诚的为车子机上绿丝带的父亲„„（待补充）

（2）可以写校园生活，凸显友情、师生情或者美好的回忆：前几天，高中的孩子聚会，将我们几个老师请去，一块聊天，一块回忆，一块拍照，一天的时间在快乐中匆匆而过，那种对自己美好过去的怀念与追忆，让人心中禁不住泛起层层的涟漪，这个温馨而炫丽的画面，在我脑海中久久挥之不去，你的记忆中，有没有这种已经分离的师生相聚的画面呢？也许是《黑板上的记忆》、《几分愧疚在心头》等校园故事的再现；也许是你在操场上、运动场上永远无法忘记的一抹身影（那个陪着你跑到终点的人）等等。

（3）可以写日常生活中的普通人，写出人与人之间的温馨：可以写这样一个画面，早上下楼，楼下的这在整理杂物的阿婆向我高声问候，走到小区门口，传达大叔一边开门一边向我微笑，走出小区，早早出摊的阿姨也为我祝福，三个人物，三个画面，定格在脑海之中，朴素的话语，真挚的情感，让我深深的感动。（或者三种微笑）

（4）可以写在游历或者平常看到的难忘的自然景观：那在流淌的途中，面对峭壁选择了傲然耸立的瀑布；那在绝壁之上、贫瘠的土壤之中，毅然成长的松树；那在乡村的田野，遍地开放的无名的野花；那长白山顶峰，遮挡了美景的迷雾等等。

3、文章布局上的方法

（1）写人记事，关键是方法要到位，比如欲扬先抑，比如倒序插叙，比如触景生情，比如伏笔铺垫，比如前后对比，比如侧面的衬托，比如联想比喻，比如一波三折，比如多次再现，比如过渡衔接，比如单独成段，比如多次扣题，比如首尾呼应，比如借物喻人等等。

（2）要想写出难忘，必须对让你难忘的点写的淋漓精致，那么文中就应该有一段或以上细致的刻画或者描写。